Woggle Posted April 29, 2010 Posted April 29, 2010 Attracting women is the easy part but too many men see a cute body and a nice smile and assume that a woman is worthy relationship material which is clearly not the case. Men need to learn what red flags to look for and what signs a woman gives that she might be a future cheater or a future walkaway wife or in general will betray a man. We also need to learn what are the signs of a good partner and what traits a woman who is commitment material has. There are so many books on picking up women but I see none on choosing the right woman.
USMCHokie Posted April 29, 2010 Posted April 29, 2010 I think life experience is what teaches us this lesson...something that no book can provide...every person has to receive their shares of burns and heartbreaks before they realize what it is they are looking for...and more importantly, realize what it is they aren't looking for...
Author Woggle Posted April 29, 2010 Author Posted April 29, 2010 I think life experience is what teaches us this lesson...something that no book can provide...every person has to receive their shares of burns and heartbreaks before they realize what it is they are looking for...and more importantly, realize what it is they aren't looking for... Most of us do learn the hard way but one of us should write a book for the younger generation so they don't make the same mistakes we did.
sumdude Posted April 29, 2010 Posted April 29, 2010 I agree to a point. But the tough part is the right woman for one man won't be the right woman for another. Also that somewhere there is always a leap of faith. However.. I have a few pointers which I earned the hard way! - If the majority of your friends and/or family think something is amiss with her/him? Believe them - If they admit do doing something bad to someone else in the past don't be surprised if they do it to you eventually. Could be far down the line... - You have three centers. The brain, the groin and the gut. All should agree but the gut has veto powers!
A O Posted April 29, 2010 Posted April 29, 2010 Attracting women is the easy part but too many men see a cute body and a nice smile and assume that a woman is worthy relationship material which is clearly not the case. Indeed, and women have a habit of letting personality cloud their judgment every bit as much as men let looks cloud theirs. Bottom line though is that your advice is true for us 'all'. .
OpenGL Posted April 29, 2010 Posted April 29, 2010 I really think you mischaracterize the type of women most men go after. For some reason women on this forum think men go after model types and those are the women they are rejecting them. Avergre men do go after average bookstore/coffee shop type women all the time and they reject average men on a daily basis. I think most of us are not even attracted to the typical club whores.
Dblock10 Posted April 29, 2010 Posted April 29, 2010 i see what your saying woggle but its like driving a car, you could read for a long time but until you get into a car and start to try and drive it, you'll never get it right
Dblock10 Posted April 29, 2010 Posted April 29, 2010 see i can identify women who are not right for me, but its that that makes me want them more. knowing they are not right lol.. i need a lesson on how to stop that...
hopesndreams Posted April 29, 2010 Posted April 29, 2010 Where's the book on choosing the right man? Don't see that anywhere either.
OpenGL Posted April 29, 2010 Posted April 29, 2010 Where's the book on choosing the right man? Don't see that anywhere either. You don't need a book, you just need to open your guys and throw the laundry list in the garbage.
hopesndreams Posted April 29, 2010 Posted April 29, 2010 Hahaha, I don't have a laundry list. Do you assume all women have one? I'll tell you something, the man's laundry list, is very long.
sagetalk Posted April 29, 2010 Posted April 29, 2010 - If the majority of your friends and/or family think something is amiss with her/him? Believe them There's a big one right there.
OpenGL Posted April 29, 2010 Posted April 29, 2010 Hahaha, I don't have a laundry list. Do you assume all women have one? I'll tell you something, the man's laundry list, is very long. That's a load of baloney. A man's laundry list is VERY short. In fact, here is what most 20-something laundry list looks like: 1. Not Obese 2. No kids Here is what 30-something's laundry list looks like: 1. Not Obese
sagetalk Posted April 29, 2010 Posted April 29, 2010 That's a load of baloney. A man's laundry list is VERY short. In fact, here is what most 20-something laundry list looks like: 1. Not Obese 2. No kids Yep that's pretty much it. Few other things, but I'd be attracted to her just from that. As sad as it sounds, finding just those two things is not easy . Most of the girls out there don't even try, it's really sad.
OpenGL Posted April 29, 2010 Posted April 29, 2010 Yep that's pretty much it. Few other things, but I'd be attracted to her just from that. As sad as it sounds, finding just those two things is not easy . Most of the girls out there don't even try, it's really sad. I would suspect at least 50% of women age 24-30 are either obese, have kids, or both.
fantasy2000 Posted April 29, 2010 Posted April 29, 2010 Despite all the changes in the role of women over that last 20 years, work, career etc.. I truly believe that most men are still looking for a "Stepford Wife". A traditional woman who will be loyal, cook and clean and not cause him a lot of stress. Call me old fashioned but men have not changed a lot when it comes to this. Men can disagree with me if they want. Women working outside the home has become an economic necessity for many families but I think that many women would prefer to be home spending time with their children at least during those formative years. Men see a pretty face and a cute body of course but tell me honestly do you think a Paris Hilton type is what he really wants for a wife? He wants someone to take over some of the roles his mother did. When it gets down to reality he wants a wife at home looking after things who will be there for him when he needs her and not off at the clubs with the girls. Certainly not high maintenance and demanding. Thats the cute girl.
hopesndreams Posted April 29, 2010 Posted April 29, 2010 Despite all the changes in the role of women over that last 20 years, work, career etc.. I truly believe that most men are still looking for a "Stepford Wife". A traditional woman who will be loyal, cook and clean and not cause him a lot of stress. Call me old fashioned but men have not changed a lot when it comes to this. Men can disagree with me if they want. Women working outside the home has become an economic necessity for many families but I think that many women would prefer to be home spending time with their children at least during those formative years. Men see a pretty face and a cute body of course but tell me honestly do you think a Paris Hilton type is what he really wants for a wife? He wants someone to take over some of the roles his mother did. When it gets down to reality he wants a wife at home looking after things who will be there for him when he needs her and not off at the clubs with the girls. Certainly not high maintenance and demanding. Thats the cute girl. Yes, men are looking for new mummies if they are looking for long term. That's the sad reality. Preferably one that isn't obese or already has kids.
fantasy2000 Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 Men see a pretty face and a cute body of course but tell me honestly do you think a Paris Hilton type is what he really wants for a wife? But he does like to look at her and maybe hang out with her or visit her at the strip bar. However, he does not want to cater to her. No man can love her as much as she loves herself.
Stung Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 That's a load of baloney. A man's laundry list is VERY short. In fact, here is what most 20-something laundry list looks like: 1. Not Obese 2. No kids Here is what 30-something's laundry list looks like: 1. Not Obese Woman A isn't obese and has no kids. She has a low-paying job she's looking forward to quitting the second she gets her hooks in a man. She has a mountain of credit card debt. She has a lot of ex-boyfriends hanging around who call her cell phone in the middle of the night. She hates giving blowjobs. She hates your dog. She drinks like a fish until she's falling-down-drunk in public almost every weekend. She is controlling and humorless and never gets your references...any, perhaps all of the above. Woman B isn't obese and has no kids. She has a job she genuinely likes and is good at. She is bright and sweet and witty and gets all your weird jokes. She is fiscally responsible and personally loyal, with a lot of integrity. She is sexually adventurous and generous with a high libido. She has reasonable and appropriate boundaries with her exes, who never hang around stressing you out. She is kind to your dog and takes it for walks when you're feeling ill. She knows her limit and doesn't drink to excess. She's even-tempered and fun to be around. I guess OpenGL would be just as happy to date either A or B as they are interchangeable to him, both meeting his only criteria for a longterm mate. As for Woggle's OP, I can't say I really disagree. There are a lot of ugly people in pretty packaging and both sexes are better off when they learn to be discerning about what's under the wrapper.
tigressA Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 Woman A isn't obese and has no kids. She has a low-paying job she's looking forward to quitting the second she gets her hooks in a man. She has a mountain of credit card debt. She has a lot of ex-boyfriends hanging around who call her cell phone in the middle of the night. She hates giving blowjobs. She hates your dog. She drinks like a fish until she's falling-down-drunk in public almost every weekend. She is controlling and humorless and never gets your references...any, perhaps all of the above. Woman B isn't obese and has no kids. She has a job she genuinely likes and is good at. She is bright and sweet and witty and gets all your weird jokes. She is fiscally responsible and personally loyal, with a lot of integrity. She is sexually adventurous and generous with a high libido. She has reasonable and appropriate boundaries with her exes, who never hang around stressing you out. She is kind to your dog and takes it for walks when you're feeling ill. She knows her limit and doesn't drink to excess. She's even-tempered and fun to be around. I guess OpenGL would be just as happy to date either A or B as they are interchangeable to him, both meeting his only criteria for a longterm mate. As for Woggle's OP, I can't say I really disagree. There are a lot of ugly people in pretty packaging and both sexes are better off when they learn to be discerning about what's under the wrapper. Quoted for truth.
sagetalk Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 Yes, men are looking for new mummies if they are looking for long term. That's the sad reality. Preferably one that isn't obese or already has kids. New mommy's LOL, you sound a little bit bitter. I have a mom and she is awesome. I want a wife not a mom, but I do want my future kids to have a great mom. Just because a woman is good at cooking or wants to stay home and raise kids does not mean she is any less than a career women. The only way the women's movement is a step forward for women is if it offers them a choice. If it demands they get a job and don't cook or clean, then it's a step backwards in my opinion. Women should be free to do what they want, and not be looked down on if they choose the more traditional path. I personally think those traditional kind of girls are awesome .
Author Woggle Posted April 30, 2010 Author Posted April 30, 2010 I would not touch Paris Hilton with a ten foot pole but that does not mean I want a stepford wife. I actually want an equal relationship. That being said most women still want an Alpha provider and want a man to play a traditional role and if that is the case why shouldn't she play her role as well? If a woman expects me to pay for everything and take the main leadership role then why shouldn't I expect her to cook, clean and play the traditional female roles? Women can get mad at this but if so then they should expecting men to play our roles. Equality goes both ways.
Crazy Magnet Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 I would not touch Paris Hilton with a ten foot pole but that does not mean I want a stepford wife. I actually want an equal relationship. That being said most women still want an Alpha provider and want a man to play a traditional role and if that is the case why shouldn't she play her role as well? If a woman expects me to pay for everything and take the main leadership role then why shouldn't I expect her to cook, clean and play the traditional female roles? Women can get mad at this but if so then they should expecting men to play our roles. Equality goes both ways. In my dream world I'll end up with a stay at home dad. I have no qualms about taking over the role of provider and have always been upfront about the fact that I plan to have a fairly high powered career throughout life. A couple of guy's haven't been able to let go of their own alpha/man role tendencies and still expected me to sacrifice my career to follow their mediocre paying jobs and stay home and cook and clean, but some have openly admitted they would gladly allow me to pursue my career and wouldn't mind being a stay at home dad. I can be domestic if I really want to, but I'm much better suited to a career/money earning role.
espec10001 Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 I want to know exactly what set off this whole feminist "we're better than men" attitude among women. What was it about having everything provided for you by a man that was so bad? All you had to do was remain loyal, trustworthy, and raise the children. Women, in all their understanding and striving towards something, have gotten in the way of men and what they need to do. You will never put out the fire that is the heart of man. And I know that's what you want, you want to steal men's burning passion, take away his pride. Yes, women want to feel what it's like to burn wild with passion! But while women are 1/2 of the equation, they can bring us to the next stages of our evolution as the Men, they cannot comprehend the stages themselves. They are the path between them!
tkgirl Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 I want to know exactly what set off this whole feminist "we're better than men" attitude among women. What was it about having everything provided for you by a man that was so bad? All you had to do was remain loyal, trustworthy, and raise the children. Women, in all their understanding and striving towards something, have gotten in the way of men and what they need to do. You will never put out the fire that is the heart of man. And I know that's what you want, you want to steal men's burning passion, take away his pride. Yes, women want to feel what it's like to burn wild with passion! But while women are 1/2 of the equation, they can bring us to the next stages of our evolution as the Men, they cannot comprehend the stages themselves. They are the path between them! who ever said we were better than men? and as far as all the other BS... really? this has to be one of the most ignorant posts I've ever read here on LS... get out from under your rock dude...
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