Author OpenGL Posted April 30, 2010 Author Posted April 30, 2010 If you stay in shape and become at least somewhat financially and/or professionally successful, your prospects can improve dramatically by the time you are in your 30s if you can remain positive and avoid becoming bitter. I am 34 and attract better women in their 20s now than I did when I was 25 for some reason. Women have this obsession with "confidence" and the older you get, the less you will care what other people think about you and the more "confident" you seem. When you are younger and don't know how you are supposed to behave around women, it can make you seem as though you are not confident when in reality you are really just inexperienced. I hope this is actually true, I'm mid 20's and I'm already making close to six figures and in extremely good shape. The only downside is that I am very short and I'm afraid that no matter how successful I am in my 30's I can't compensate for it. And I refuse to date fat chicks.
Author OpenGL Posted April 30, 2010 Author Posted April 30, 2010 something he wishes he could change, and he can! It is all within his power! Sorry, false.
espec10001 Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 Sorry, false. Only if you believe it to be! The mind has many hidden powers.
carhill Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 OP, you might be chagrined to hear that the slumber is alive and well for many women in their 40's and beyond. Some never 'grow up' and some, having married at a quite young age, are now experiencing their second 'youth', with the 'wild' they never had before. The good news is, at my age, it's now pretty easy to spot and avoid. No harm, no dead animals. Plenty of meat for them to be wild with, thank God. You think there's an aspect of yourself which impels your failure with women. There is. You're thinking it. You've created your own reality. I lived this, so I know. The power isn't in change, rather in acceptance. Good luck
Author OpenGL Posted April 30, 2010 Author Posted April 30, 2010 Only if you believe it to be! The mind has many hidden powers. You can't change your genetics with your mind.
espec10001 Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 You can't change your genetics with your mind. You say you are short. When the mind focuses on things, such as height, it intensifies, and the man becomes more conscious of it, and it becomes a larger and larger 'issue' that bars him from his powers. If you train the mind to forget it, it is no longer an issue. How you perceive yourself is often very close to how others view you. Focus on your strengths and watch them amplify and overshadow your shortcomings (no pun intended). This is the hidden force!
Author OpenGL Posted April 30, 2010 Author Posted April 30, 2010 You say you are short. When the mind focuses on things, such as height, it intensifies, and the man becomes more conscious of it, and it becomes a larger and larger 'issue' that bars him from his powers. If you train the mind to forget it, it is no longer an issue. How you perceive yourself is often very close to how others view you. Focus on your strengths and watch them amplify and overshadow your shortcomings (no pun intended). This is the hidden force! Sorry, false. I don't care at all that I'm short. Believe or not, I actually rather be my height (5'7) than 6'2. The problem isn't me at all, it's women. No matter how much I like myself (and I do), I can't control how women feel about me. They don't even know me. They either find me attractive or they don't, period. This is intensified online as the woman in the blog stated. You can be the most confident guy in the world, but she will look at your stats and won't even consider giving you the time of day. You don't exist.
espec10001 Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 Sorry, false. I don't care at all that I'm short. Believe or not, I actually rather be my height (5'7) than 6'2. The problem isn't me at all, it's women. No matter how much I like myself (and I do), I can't control how women feel about me. They don't even know me. They either find me attractive or they don't, period. This is intensified online as the woman in the blog stated. You can be the most confident guy in the world, but she will look at your stats and won't even consider giving you the time of day. You don't exist. You exist, outside any woman's opinion of you. The problem is placing too much value in a woman's opinion. They don't know you, so why should you care what they feel about you or think about you? I'm not talking about being a jerk, I'm talking about being firm and steady with who you are and that no woman can change that, no matter how stunningly beautiful or sweet she is. Once you stop caring what women think of you it'll become much easier. But that comes with experience like the previous poster said.
Author OpenGL Posted April 30, 2010 Author Posted April 30, 2010 You exist, outside any woman's opinion of you. The problem is placing too much value in a woman's opinion. They don't know you, so why should you care what they feel about you or think about you? I'm not talking about being a jerk, I'm talking about being firm and steady with who you are and that no woman can change that, no matter how stunningly beautiful or sweet she is. Once you stop caring what women think of you it'll become much easier. But that comes with experience like the previous poster said. Actually, I already don't care, at all. Not caring doesn't really change anything though. Being deeply concerned and not caring results in the same thing; me being unwanted and alone.
espec10001 Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 Actually, I already don't care, at all. Not caring doesn't really change anything though. Being deeply concerned and not caring results in the same thing; me being unwanted and alone. Do you have hobbies? Something you can show off to a lady? A talent? Something that sets you apart from the crowd?
AD1980 Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 Do you have hobbies? Something you can show off to a lady? A talent? Something that sets you apart from the crowd? Wy do Men have to have a huge skill or talent to attratc an average women? All women need is a vagina and to be somewhat decent looking and nice.. Men have to jump through hoops to get noticed like some monkeys..
Author OpenGL Posted April 30, 2010 Author Posted April 30, 2010 Do you have hobbies? Something you can show off to a lady? A talent? Something that sets you apart from the crowd? Lots of hobbies, all of them male centric like most other guys. As for talents, such as singing and dancing and such, no, but then again how many guys are good singers? Very very few. My gift was intellect which is of no value in the dating world. Actually it's most likely a net negative. And there's a lot of things that sets me apart from other men. It's just that none of them are valuable assets to women.
Author OpenGL Posted April 30, 2010 Author Posted April 30, 2010 Men have to jump through hoops to get noticed like some monkeys.. Yup and jumping through hoops likely yields no results unless you are good looking, which in that case you don't need to jump through hoops anyway
espec10001 Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 Wy do Men have to have a huge skill or talent to attratc an average women? All women need is a vagina and to be somewhat decent looking and nice.. Men have to jump through hoops to get noticed like some monkeys.. It's not developing the skill or talent for the purpose of attract a woman. It's the doing that is the enriching part. Attracting a woman is just a by-product of a skill or talent, success or victory. Think about it, women attract men by looking pretty, so how are men supposed to attract women? By displaying skill or talent, it gets attention, and women are attracted to men who receive a lot of attention for talents. And also, keep in mind that it takes many, many failures before you can declare success. Just because 100 women shoot you down does not mean that the 101st will!
Phantom9309 Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 Lots of hobbies, all of them male centric like most other guys. As for talents, such as singing and dancing and such, no, but then again how many guys are good singers? Very very few. My gift was intellect which is of no value in the dating world. Actually it's most likely a net negative. And there's a lot of things that sets me apart from other men. It's just that none of them are valuable assets to women. If you say your talent is intellect then I believe you should be able to rationalize the failure in your structure of thinking. As for the height thing, I'm 5'5 and believe myself to have more confidence than you when it comes to women. Get rid of your negative thinking and you'll notice that women will act differently around you.
espec10001 Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 Lots of hobbies, all of them male centric like most other guys. As for talents, such as singing and dancing and such, no, but then again how many guys are good singers? Very very few. My gift was intellect which is of no value in the dating world. Actually it's most likely a net negative. And there's a lot of things that sets me apart from other men. It's just that none of them are valuable assets to women. It's your mind-set! You believe that they are not valuable assets to women, so they aren't. Sort of like a self fulfilling prophecy, isn't it? Surely if you have intellect you can see how it is your mind that is causing you to believe that women don't value you.
Author OpenGL Posted April 30, 2010 Author Posted April 30, 2010 If you say your talent is intellect then I believe you should be able to rationalize the failure in your structure of thinking. As for the height thing, I'm 5'5 and believe myself to have more confidence than you when it comes to women. Get rid of your negative thinking and you'll notice that women will act differently around you. What makes you think I'm not confident?
Author OpenGL Posted April 30, 2010 Author Posted April 30, 2010 It's your mind-set! You believe that they are not valuable assets to women, so they aren't. Sort of like a self fulfilling prophecy, isn't it? Surely if you have intellect you can see how it is your mind that is causing you to believe that women don't value you. Sorry that is just pie-in-the-sky BS. I'm a realist. Not a pessimist, a realist. I see reality. The reality is the blog I linked in the OP, straight from a woman's mouth. I have the mind-set of reality, not a self fulfilling prophecy.
AD1980 Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 It's not developing the skill or talent for the purpose of attract a woman. It's the doing that is the enriching part. Attracting a woman is just a by-product of a skill or talent, success or victory. Think about it, women attract men by looking pretty, so how are men supposed to attract women? By displaying skill or talent, it gets attention, and women are attracted to men who receive a lot of attention for talents. And also, keep in mind that it takes many, many failures before you can declare success. Just because 100 women shoot you down does not mean that the 101st will! You act like looks mean nothing to women when it comes to a Man..
Phantom9309 Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 Sorry that is just pie-in-the-sky BS. I'm a realist. Not a pessimist, a realist. I see reality. The reality is the blog I linked in the OP, straight from a woman's mouth. I have the mind-set of reality, not a self fulfilling prophecy. Reality is something which no one person can define indefinitely because it will ultimately vary from person to person. Sure there is a structure to how things exist and we have to live in it. Does it mean that it can't be changed? Those who truely have confidence will except that they must walk the road less traveled. Without really going into explanation, I'll say one more thing. Structure creates systems and eventually systems create structure.
espec10001 Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 Sorry that is just pie-in-the-sky BS. I'm a realist. Not a pessimist, a realist. I see reality. The reality is the blog I linked in the OP, straight from a woman's mouth. I have the mind-set of reality, not a self fulfilling prophecy. Then you must not have the intellect that you claim you have. Otherwise you would understand that you CAN eliminate useless and weak thoughts and replace them with consistent and positive thinking. Intellect is the ability of the mind to focus and translate thoughts into action. Positive thoughts translate to positive action, and vise-versa.
espec10001 Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 You act like looks mean nothing to women when it comes to a Man.. They don't mean as much as you think. The main attribute that attracts women is confidence. How is confidence born in man? 4 steps. 1. His will, in his mind. An ultimate goal, when he can declare success. This is the spark within him. 2. His understanding that flows from his will throughout his thought process, his will directing his thoughts towards the specific goal. 3. His breathing. Slow and steady, rhythmic breathing. He must remain calm and steady in the face of many trials towards his will (failure). 4. Action in the outside world that tends to this original will. So, lets say your goal is to get a girlfriend. That is the will. Next, eliminate any and all thoughts that are in opposition or obstruct this will. Next, learn to control your breathing. Finally, when all of these are in place, it manifests itself in action, and action is the world in which women see you.
tincanman99 Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 Frankly I think online dating is a huge waste of time for men. Been there and done it. First I think there is huge numbers of men versus women. No matter how they slice it. Average women get huge numbers of responses. Its like applying for jobs online where they use software nowadays to scan for keywords. If you dont have the keywords they dont talk to you, end of story. Its the same with online dating. Because its so cut and dry how do you stand out from the other 1000 guys that contact her? It lets women be even more fussy than they normally are. I think you are better off going outside and hitting yourself with a rock till you pass out . No point doing either.
phineas Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 I think you are better off going outside and hitting yourself with a rock till you pass out . No point doing either. Actually you might have better luck getting a woman's attention this way. LOL!
sagetalk Posted April 30, 2010 Posted April 30, 2010 But of course the ol' 'be friends with her and just see how it goes' method is too ancient and unprofitable, eh? Why spend a month getting to know a woman when you could possibly immediately arrange a 'date' without getting to know her much... and maybe even score? I like the friends approach better, but it only seems to work if she has no other good options. If she does, it's usually "We should just be friends" and off to have sex with the guy who wanted to date her.
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