Roach Posted April 28, 2010 Posted April 28, 2010 My moods seem to be on a roller coaster lately. Back story: Last August I lost my job and shortly after my wife left me(for the 5th time). She returned home a week later and we agreed to work on the issues in our marriage. The first few weeks seemed like a big improvement, but she started to care less and less each day. I think the only reason she came back was that I felt I would get a job soon and she thought she could get alimony(she hasn't had a job in years). It got to the point where we never touched each other and were barely speaking, the only thing we shared was moments with our 2 year old son. About 2 months ago I started the conversation about what was going badly and she basically summed it up with the fact that she didn't care about our relationship and didn't want to be married if it meant she had to put in effort. We(mostly her) decided it was finally time to get divorced. She has since moved out of the house and we have a parenting plan in place(that gives me the majority of the parenting time), which she is bitter about. Where I am today: We have lawyers and will be having to make a permanent parenting plan next month, which might get ugly. I want him during the week with her having him on weekends, she wants 50/50. We're not yelling at each other, but often argue. It seems like life is great as long as I'm busy doing something, but as soon as I'm idle I realize just how alone I feel. I have a great family supporting me and amazing friends, but I can't hang out with them all the time. Part of what makes it hard is that I have a ton of free time while being unemployed. I also still care greatly for my wife, if she hadn't taken the easy way out I'd still want to be married to her. I miss having a person thats on the same wave length as me and I really miss hugs and cuddling in bed. I'm ready to date, since our marriage has pretty much been over for a year, but I have to keep myself from moving too fast since I'm at a point in my life where I want to be married and live with another person, not just hang out with them once or twice a week. To those of you that have been separated for sometime, how long did it take for to get used to being alone?
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