kristinabopp Posted April 27, 2010 Posted April 27, 2010 i have a problem about my family, specially to my mom. she is controlling me and making me feel guilty about everything i do!i cant take it anymore, i really get stressed about this and i dont know what to do. all i want is to move out again once i saved enough money and go to school. this morning shes like telling me to take a program for some computer stuff so that i can work in an office. *in my mind im like, i dont like working in an office, im comfortable working in my job, i dont want to sit 8hours a day!* and i have my own plans for my future. ive been out of school for almost 4years because she made me work when i got here in US! my dream is to GRADUATE too!not just to work the whole time and earn money!i have a dream too i dont just dream to just work my entire life and not have an educational background. i have been stressing about this since i came back here in california, and i just burst out crying thinking that i should have never came back to live with them if she is going to control me again. she cant even support me financially, she tells me that i cant go to a university because were not rich!im like, ok theres financial aid and loans! all i need is her support for me to be able to be successful in life but if she cant give that support to me and just lock me inside of our apartment and just work and go home then ill just move out when i have enough money. it makes me depressed everything i think of my situation. i cant help but cry. last month i got into a fight with her, because shes to pushy about stuff and about money, but everytime she says crap i just kept quiet but last month i literally shouted and started crying and telling her i have my own like and i dont like it when people tells me what to do and what not!!*by shouting* i never thought ill act that way, but it feels good in the end because i cant just keep quiet. and then she respond me back by shouting and said *just finish the lease contract of the apartment and you can go!* i felt more happy coz she said that, but now, shes like controlling me again. what if she forgot that she said that? i want to move out so badly! and start going to school! but it seems like she wants to take back what she said! anyone here related to my situation? im 20 turning 21 this september. i need some support here..
Peaceful Guy Posted April 27, 2010 Posted April 27, 2010 anyone here related to my situation? im 20 turning 21 this september. i need some support here.. my god yes, i can! im sorry. it sucks. its not forever..
Peaceful Guy Posted April 28, 2010 Posted April 28, 2010 im sorry no one else had responded! i think that something to keep in mind is that you get to make the decisions about what happens next in your life. i know that it feels very real when a parent says you can or cannot do something, but ultimately you'll need to make decisions for yourself. they have ideas about what is best for you.. and in their mind it REALLY is what is best. but its your life.. and you need to be the one calling the shots, even if only to learn from your mistakes. you're smart, young, and you've got a good idea of something you want to do. i say go for it!
KikiW Posted April 29, 2010 Posted April 29, 2010 I'm sorry, I am not in the situation and my mom doesn't sound much like your mom, but you have my sympathy and support! And PG is right, it won't last forever. Listen to your mom's advice, but make your own decisions. Some decisions may not be the best, but you are allowed to make mistakes in life. Hopefully your mom will grow to accept who you are and help you be the best YOU possible.
Author kristinabopp Posted April 30, 2010 Author Posted April 30, 2010 thank u peaceful guy. i know, its just that its hard.i cant stop thinking about it. it just makes me depressed.
Peaceful Guy Posted May 1, 2010 Posted May 1, 2010 tonight is saturday.. unless you've got work on the weekends, its a great night to exercise your independance! just be safe!!!!
Author kristinabopp Posted May 1, 2010 Author Posted May 1, 2010 weell.. unfortunately, im working this weekend. but im off on monday! sad thing is, i dont go out because i dont have friends here, mostly my friends are in DC. whatever. i have a laptop anyways, and i can sleep during that time.
TwinkletOes26 Posted May 1, 2010 Posted May 1, 2010 Youre def not alone....my mother is controlling as well. Just recently she demanded I stay home instead of going to spend the weekend with my friend that I had planned in advanced. Her excuse for her rude behavior is always her depression....before that it was her "hormones".....best thing I can tell you is try your best to get out. She will never change and will always think that shes doing the "right" thing.
Peaceful Guy Posted May 8, 2010 Posted May 8, 2010 Just recently she demanded I stay home instead of going to spend the weekend with my friend that I had planned in advanced. awww, that sucks! did she find pot in your sleeping bag?? :laugh: im just kidding.. that must have been extremely frustrating!!!
Peaceful Guy Posted May 8, 2010 Posted May 8, 2010 weell.. unfortunately, im working this weekend. but im off on monday! sad thing is, i dont go out because i dont have friends here, mostly my friends are in DC. whatever. i have a laptop anyways, and i can sleep during that time. so.. any updates?? same old? at the least.. im not sure where you are exactly.. but could you get out to an internet cafe or something? poetry reading??
Peaceful Guy Posted May 8, 2010 Posted May 8, 2010 you might not meet anybody but just to get out of the house for a bit.. also, you might make a friend or two as well!
Author kristinabopp Posted May 8, 2010 Author Posted May 8, 2010 i live in sacramento california, and my place is completely like a dead town or dessert. i only go out when my mom is going out to the grocery.but besides that, i dont go out ever.i think its a good thing because i can save more money and spend more time here on my laptop? i dont like the people around here in my apartment, they are all weird. i think its better if i just stay home and just work to save enough money.im still confused.but at least love shack people are here!
Peaceful Guy Posted May 10, 2010 Posted May 10, 2010 i live in sacramento california, and my place is completely like a dead town or dessert. hmmm.. ive never seen sacramento. i would have assumed it was nice. i just looked it up on wiki.. lots of museums to visit!! i only go out when my mom is going out to the grocery.but besides that, i dont go out ever.i think its a good thing because i can save more money and spend more time here on my laptop? i just got that! i dont like the people around here in my apartment, they are all weird. jellyfish people?? no, i know what you mean. hey, check out this site -> http://www.meetup.com/ .. they have a bunch of stuff in my area.. let me look up sacramento.. here we go.. sacramento sufi meetup - "Meet other local people interested in the mystical tradition of Sufism." there was a couple other things too (), check it out! i think its better if i just stay home and just work to save enough money.im still confused.but at least love shack people are here! just keep smilin!
Shindig Posted May 12, 2010 Posted May 12, 2010 Maybe take up karate, hiking, desert landscape painting or something? It's not quite academic and not quite social which could take some pressure off you and give you an outlet.
Alex5535 Posted May 16, 2010 Posted May 16, 2010 Kristina, I'm so sorry, I wish I could do something for you. If I were in your situation before I met my savior, I would definitely kill myself. I remember when I hated my life so much because I had so many financial problems and I was all alone, no friends, no family... I started looking where I can buy potassium cyanide that would end my life instantly and painlessly, but I started crying so hard because I was scared that I would never see the sun light and the flowers ever again. Then I remembered that Jesus loves me, that he died for me so that I can have an eternal life in heaven with him, where he will wipe away all my tears and that there will be no more sadness, pain or evil. I realized that life is a precious gift from him, that cost him his innocent blood. How could I throw away such a precious gift? I started praying, asking Jesus to spare my life and to save me from my problems. I promised him that I would consecrate my life to him if he makes me happy, but he did so much more then I what asked for. I got baptized and became a member of the Seventh Day Adventist church, God gave me faithful friends and a beautiful wife who loves me so much, and we never fight because Jesus' love lives inside both of us, that alone makes our home a heaven on earth, so that even angels are not ashamed to live with us. I also promised my Lord that I would share my testimony with others who are suffering, so that maybe if they believe me then they would be saved and be happy. I swear to you that God is real and his sacrifice for your sake is priceless, no length or height can describe the magnitude of his precious love for you!!! That's what I read in the Bible: "Even if my father and mother abandon me, the LORD will hold me close." Psalm 27:10 Now find a Seventh Day Adventist church and ask them to give you bible studies, but do not go to some other church, because only Adventists take the bible as it is and who make no excuses before God's commandments. If you don't have one in proximity, then go visit this site and take those bible studies: http://www.bit.ly/aHK8Qe and http://www.AmazingFacts.com Also here is some music that will help you relax: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1xHRWCUBxaM
Peaceful Guy Posted May 20, 2010 Posted May 20, 2010 Kristina, I'm so sorry, I wish I could do something for you. If I were in your situation before I met my savior, I would definitely kill myself. I remember when I hated my life so much because I had so many financial problems and I was all alone, no friends, no family... I started looking where I can buy potassium cyanide that would end my life instantly and painlessly, but I started crying so hard because I was scared that I would never see the sun light and the flowers ever again. Then I remembered that Jesus loves me, that he died for me so that I can have an eternal life in heaven with him, where he will wipe away all my tears and that there will be no more sadness, pain or evil. I realized that life is a precious gift from him, that cost him his innocent blood. How could I throw away such a precious gift? I started praying, asking Jesus to spare my life and to save me from my problems. I promised him that I would consecrate my life to him if he makes me happy, but he did so much more then I what asked for. I got baptized and became a member of the Seventh Day Adventist church, God gave me faithful friends and a beautiful wife who loves me so much, and we never fight because Jesus' love lives inside both of us, that alone makes our home a heaven on earth, so that even angels are not ashamed to live with us. I also promised my Lord that I would share my testimony with others who are suffering, so that maybe if they believe me then they would be saved and be happy. I swear to you that God is real and his sacrifice for your sake is priceless, no length or height can describe the magnitude of his precious love for you!!! That's what I read in the Bible: "Even if my father and mother abandon me, the LORD will hold me close." Psalm 27:10 Now find a Seventh Day Adventist church and ask them to give you bible studies, but do not go to some other church, because only Adventists take the bible as it is and who make no excuses before God's commandments. If you don't have one in proximity, then go visit this site and take those bible studies: www.bit.ly/aHK8Qe and www.AmazingFacts.com Also here is some music that will help you relax: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1xHRWCUBxaM christ bot!
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