thoughts on relationships

[jmo28]

I was at a wedding this past weekend of a law school friend. He met his wife our last year of law school when she was a senior at the undergraduate level of the same school. They met in a class last semester around March. Within a month they were inseperable and she moved for him to SF where they lived together for 5 years and just got married. Its a true love story and she was saying during the vows at the wedding that she just knew that he was the one. They just felt so comfortable to each other so quickly.

 

As you may know, I thought I had this with someone recently before she probably freaked and never told me why. But, seeing my friend's experience has made me think that all of this "game" stuff we talk about on here: "am i pushing him away" or "when should i call her back" etc...really shouldn't happen. When we meet the right one, it really just should be easy and effortless. Perhaps I'm living in a dream world, but someone once told me that the games really just prolong what was going to happen anyway. There really shouldn't be a need for them.

Anyway just my thoughts. Feel free to criticize/comment.

[quankanne]

it really just should be easy and effortless

 

ideally, yes, but people come with baggage. And some folks are much more adept at handling their own baggage than others. And some folks think game-playing is important to a relationship (for whatever reasons).

 

never cared for that, whether when it was when I was dating or even now, as a married woman watching divorced friends looking for their match. It just gets annoying to see!

[Knittress]

Keeping a relationship strong is neither easy nor effortless. But as far as that initial interest and basic compatibility... yeah, best not to fake that - THAT part should be a natural extension of two people who ought to get along... getting along.

 

Also, the 'games work due to baggage' argument... really now, do you WANT those people?