EyesOpened Posted April 26, 2010 Posted April 26, 2010 So as some of you remember, I ended things with my MM about a month ago. I logically knew it was over, (mainly on his end) and had felt it for a while, and was able to convince myself to stifle my feelings as best as I could enough to make it a bit easier to walk away with some of my dignity intact. However my issue is I still have to have contact with him. Thankfully only via email or phone, however still contact. The owners of my business have a contract with him that he and I put into place. Of course I pushed for this contract for selfish reasons, so I could see him more often. At the time this happened, I was asked if this "personal relationship" would ever affect the working relationship - I was an idiot and said "of course not, I'm a professional" Ok - well I LIED! It is making me physically ANGRY and ILL to see his emails, and to be actually doing work for him. My stomach literally turns when I get an email from him. I know it will be "all business" which is what it always is, but that's such a sham to me. It's like the last year and a half we spent together just dissapeared. That the love is just gone, and he's moving on so easily like it's not a big deal. I'm all of a sudden the rejected one - when I'M the one that made the decision to end things in the first place. Bottom line is I was barely strong enough to end things, and now the longer it is I have to deal with him, the harder this is becoming for me. My insecurity is rearing it's ugly head. Seeing how easily he is moving on is making me SO angry, and I just want that anger gone so I can move on. NC would make it easier because I wouldn't have to be reminded how easy it is for him to walk. And how hard it was for me... If anyone has any suggestions on how to deal with this situation - please, I welcome them! EO
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