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guys... do you really know what you want?


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Posted

I just broke off relations with a girl I was seeing for three weeks and we both agreed within seconds of laying eyes on eachother we both knew what we wanted. Unfortunately, life doesn't work out the way planned sometimes and thats that.

Posted

yes i know what i want

Posted

On the flipside I can easily tell you what I definately DONT want.

Posted

I think in a lot of relationships, there is an imbalance -- one person likes the other more. So if a guy is telling you he only wants to be FWB, or he doesn't want a relationship, or he's not sure how he feels about you, LISTEN TO HIM. He is telling you that he will never be in a serious LT relationship with you. If that's okay, then stay. If not, you need to move on. Do not think that he will change his mind when he discovers how amazing you are, because he won't.

 

But sometimes a guy will tell you he's not ready for a serious relationship right now because he is swamped with work, traveling, just out of a relationship, etc., but he really likes you. Again, LISTEN TO HIM. He is telling you he really digs you, but it temporarily emotionally unavailable. So you need to decide whether he is worth waiting for. Pressuring him to give you what he knows he can't will just push him away. But if you wait a few months, then he might be available, so don't write him off too quickly.

 

That's my advice.

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Posted
yes i know what i want

 

of course you do alpha! ;)

 

On the flipside I can easily tell you what I definately DONT want.

 

well.. that's a start! and I can relate for sure...

but nickelback? really? I'm kidding... but my name would be "whitestripesfan" or rather just "jwfan" (jack white!)

 

I think in a lot of relationships, there is an imbalance -- one person likes the other more. So if a guy is telling you he only wants to be FWB, or he doesn't want a relationship, or he's not sure how he feels about you, LISTEN TO HIM. He is telling you that he will never be in a serious LT relationship with you. If that's okay, then stay. If not, you need to move on. Do not think that he will change his mind when he discovers how amazing you are, because he won't.

 

But sometimes a guy will tell you he's not ready for a serious relationship right now because he is swamped with work, traveling, just out of a relationship, etc., but he really likes you. Again, LISTEN TO HIM. He is telling you he really digs you, but it temporarily emotionally unavailable. So you need to decide whether he is worth waiting for. Pressuring him to give you what he knows he can't will just push him away. But if you wait a few months, then he might be available, so don't write him off too quickly.

 

That's my advice.

 

yeah, I know in my situation I definitely liked him more than he liked me... which is why I allowed him to come back into my life. I remember one night he said to me how he "tries not to get to close to anyone (meaning me) and that way no one gets hurt if it doesn't work out" I didn't know how to respond to that... but I remember crying after he left... I should have listened to him and walked right then... :( ah well, live and learn right?

Posted
because I think you do...

 

they say a guy knows within the first 5 minutes of meeting a girl... or maybe it's just a minute? :laugh: whether or not he wants to just sleep with her, or be friends, or make her his girlfriend... or none of the above! and I think women know this too... but for whatever reasons we refuse to accept it. For instance, we know deep down that the guy may just want sex but somehow we think we can turn it into a relationship. While the guy has already decided what he wants and most likely he is not going to change his mind.

 

I think if we can see how things really are and learn to cut our losses it would save us a lot of heartache down the road...

 

... or maybe I'm way off... thoughts?

 

I don't know about the other guys but I don't know WTF I want, lol.

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