student1990 Posted April 25, 2010 Posted April 25, 2010 (edited) Hi there. i have posted on these forum recently and thought id update everyone with my situation and see where i take it from here. Broke up Last Sunday, didnt really contact too much, saw each other once or twice but in a group situation. Spoke last night to clear up things at my end as during the break up, my mind was racing so i didnt take it all in The be all and end all of it is she changed her view on me over the 3 weeks we were apart, i became possessive and didnt see a chance of a future together. I accept this break up of our old relationship. today is a new day, i feel happy despite being told there wasn't a chance of us getting back together at her end. I plan to do my own thing, go and enjoy my life, learn how to play guitar, enjoy the world cup coming up and doing my work experience this summer. I wont see her much in these final weeks of university and i wont see her at all over the 4 month gap of summer. I love her still and i do miss her sometimes but i do feel like i can defiantly live without her and life is good without her, its just that tiny bit sweeter with her in it? Is this a good thing for me to feel? But i was wondering what everyones thoughts of a future for us? It clearly wouldnt be the same. I accept she is hurt now and at this current time we dont have a future together but after a long break of nearly 5 months, maybe chance to show her im not possessive then getting to spend months in the same place come september to build something, do you think theres a chance to start again, chance of a NEW relationship between us? Do you think she will shake that possessive image of me. she did say now she doesnt see me as a boyfriend, she doesn't see me as possesive now. Positive within a negative? not picking up where we left off,not rekindling the old one as that is broken now Im not holding out for hope now as i have been told clearly how she feels but i just wondered what everyone thought. Mike Edited April 25, 2010 by student1990
EthanH Posted April 25, 2010 Posted April 25, 2010 Hi, honestly, you have no idea how similar our situation are. So I so want to say you have a chance with her, and in many ways, I think there is a chance, but I think the point you need to focus on, is, it doesn't matter, if you are going to move on, you have to, have, have, have to accept that it is over. I cannot deal with that in my situation atm. My situation is made so much more difficult as she told me she knew it would be easier for her to cut me off and pretend that is what she wants. But she told me she knew that I knew that wasn't what she wanted... so that has messed my head up. Skype me on ethanhurlington...I think speaking about it would really help. And I know this is a forum, but our situations are so similar. I almost feel like it was me who wrote your post.
Author student1990 Posted April 25, 2010 Author Posted April 25, 2010 Hey man. Yeah i figured i cant be the only one in the world in this situation, despite every relationship being different. The thing that makes me think we have a chance was how and why the relationship ended. Not seeing each other was a major factor for her but the fact i changed into a possessive person in 3 weeks apart made her change her view on about me. Moving on and using the relationship to learn and grow as a person plus the fact the relationship didnt end in any nasty way could mean we fall in love again but as different people next time. As long as there is contact, there is hope. My own problem now is showing my Ex that i have moved on and grown from our old relationship if she is to consider a new one. I dont want that old relationship back it broke for reasons which i understand now. Do you guys think in time she could let go of the old me and see the new me? Any advice? All i can do now is move on from the old me in that relationship, grow and enjoy life and if i want who she is in september, have the enjoy prospect of starting the chase all over again! I dont use skype but i'll PM you if you want mate i dont mind.
EthanH Posted April 25, 2010 Posted April 25, 2010 hi, i haven't got the option to use pm as although i have been a member of her for around a month, i haven't been offered it yet. what do you think? Think it would help us both to talk about things...
Author student1990 Posted April 25, 2010 Author Posted April 25, 2010 Hey man i see. well post up an email address or something, i would make one to send you but i have to go out now, living the student lifestyle you see. Mike
Author student1990 Posted April 27, 2010 Author Posted April 27, 2010 Hey man. email me on [email protected] and we can chat about stuff if you want. Found a little ebook online that is helping me so much in getting over this initial painful stage into a stage of moving on and then giving me options if i feel i want to start something new with my ex. It isnt the same as those mind game ones which ive tried, works more on being honest and sincere in your approach. I think i have a good chance of getting myself in a position where i can get a second chance with her, if thats what i want in the end. I think you should go NC for bit, give her space for a few months and move on then see if you still want her in your life in that way after a little time and if she hasnt contacted you, restart contact.
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