sphx26 Posted April 25, 2010 Posted April 25, 2010 I had an online long distance relationship with this girl and it ran for a good 7 months or so. Anyway, she found someone new and I had to find out about it from a friend. I found out myself and I am deeply hurt,I couldn't beleive she lied and cheated on me since we've always talked about how we are supposed to be "honest" with each other if someone finds a new interest there. She broke up with me about two months before she and this girl are officially together but as I've noticed, it had been going on way back around 4 or 5 months ago! After the breakup I tried to remain friends with her (I think because I was still shocked of what happened so I tried to hold on) but everytime I talk to her as a friend, I can't help but think how she lied to me and I was starring to hate myself for dealing with someone like her, thus, I told her I can't do the friendship thing anymore. (Although I really don't want to throw everything away and would like to be her friend). So I am doing the No contact thing for 4 days now, and I feel better,although it still hurts and I still cry every now and then. The only thing I'm thinking right now is we kinda ended in a good note, ironic as it seems to be. She says she understands I need time off and that she's hoping to hear from me in the future. Did she really mean this? and will it be right to be in contact with her in the future? if so, then what for? She was never a friend to start with, when we're on IM, I am always the one who initiates contact. So,is there reason for me to contact her in the future, after I forgive her (If I could) about what happened? Should I contact her first or should I wait for her to contact me?
CaliGuy Posted April 25, 2010 Posted April 25, 2010 You always stick with NC and move on. If they were really meant to be with you then it would be. Read my links for more info.
AriaIncognito Posted April 25, 2010 Posted April 25, 2010 I agree with Caliguy. I find that breaking NC, even when you KNOW there's no hope for you and the former love or you are pining for what was, is just torture for you. To this day I have an ex that I would love to be in contact with, but every time we've had contact, it always had me thinking about old times and how I wished things went differently. He's now married and whatnot and unless I reach out to him, I know I will never hear from him again. And that's how it should stay. Don't waste your time looking backward, gotta look forward, as painful and difficult as it will be.
Author sphx26 Posted April 26, 2010 Author Posted April 26, 2010 Yes, thank you for sharing your experiences. I plan to stay NC too, but still, a part of me says that I know you all said that I should forget about being friends but I really do not want to throw everything away,and since we ended on a good note, except for her cheating on me and lying about it. Arrrgh my head is so messed up right now..
USMCHokie Posted April 26, 2010 Posted April 26, 2010 Yes, thank you for sharing your experiences. I plan to stay NC too, but still, a part of me says that I know you all said that I should forget about being friends but I really do not want to throw everything away,and since we ended on a good note, except for her cheating on me and lying about it. Arrrgh my head is so messed up right now.. Then leave it on a good note and move on with your life. You're not throwing anything away. You're leaving your past in the past. Stay NC.
Author sphx26 Posted April 26, 2010 Author Posted April 26, 2010 Yeah I guess I ought to look after myself because no one else will..lol. I just wish this pain stops, I've tried everything to forget her: blocked her everywhere and evidence of her. I'm staying strong in my No Contact though,It's day 5.hehe
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