ilikegirls Posted April 25, 2010 Posted April 25, 2010 we have been going out for about 4 months now.. our relationship has been really good. occasionally we bump heads, but nothing big. and we are taking everything really slow...im not rushing anything at all, i only do things with her consent, to make sure we both are ready. i have a few questions: when we first started going out we kissed w/ tongue... but now whenever we kiss/makeout.. we only suck on each others lips & when i try to slip my tongue in she rejects it... why is this??? i dont get it? also she loves me playing/feeling her butt, i actually gave her a hickey on one cheek. she lets me feel up her shirt.. and a little while after she let me see, now she lets me kiss her breasts, and play with the nipple with my tongue. etc etc but one time when we were cuddling, we both feel asleep... and i guess i slipped my hand done her pants(the front) i didnt do anything, just my hand was just resting on her pubic area, i guess. and when i woke up she was mad at me for it. (after i apologized, and told her i did in unknowingly.. she didnt really care much) but why would she let me do all those other things and not that?
ADF Posted April 25, 2010 Posted April 25, 2010 Taking it slow sounds like a good idea in theory. But in reality, it is usually a mistake. The reason is that most women who are even remotely attractive--i.e. who are witty, charming, good-looking, whatever--are usually being persued by multiple men at any given time. A man who moves too slowly is simply going to be pushed aside by one who is more aggressive. That said, she is giving you some VERY mixed signals. However, it sounds like you are giving her mixed signals as well. Be more assertive. Stop taking everything so slow. She has shown she has an interest in you. She may well be frustrated by the slow pace you are setting.
Author ilikegirls Posted April 25, 2010 Author Posted April 25, 2010 ^you didnt answer my questions though And how can i be more assertive, if im not allowed(by her) to go any further.. i dont want to force her, or do things that shes not ok with?
ADF Posted April 25, 2010 Posted April 25, 2010 ^you didnt answer my questions though And how can i be more assertive, if im not allowed(by her) to go any further.. i dont want to force her, or do things that shes not ok with? I meant assertive in the sense that you need to make clear what your wants and needs are, and ask her to lay out what she wants and needs as well. It sounds like you are trying to sort this situation out without confronting it directly, like you're trying to intuit what she is thinking. That's probably not the best way to go in your situation.
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