Pleco Posted April 24, 2010 Posted April 24, 2010 Let me start this off by saying that I am NOT usually a materialistic person. I'm very simple, don't buy expensive clothes, don't care about expensive cars, and I think most materialistic things are a huge waste of time. BUT I have a few hobbies that I love. One of these hobbies is riding motorcycles. I've been into bikes for longer than I've known my SO. Right before I met him, I was in a near-fatal crash that (obviously) totaled my last bike. At the time he was scared of bikes and didn't want to get one. Fast forward to September of last year, we purchased a small bike together and fixed it up. I like this little bike but it's an older style and for the past year I've been really wanting to get a certain model bike (a new Ninja, for those who know anything about them). My boyfriend is graduating from college in a few weeks and is getting a large sum of money from his mother (roughly 30k). She has also set him up with a good job right out of college. As a graduation present to himself, he is buying (for himself) the bike that I want. I'm jealous, I'll be the first to admit it. I am in school right now and have been paying our rent and utilities by myself for 7 months. I've done this because he has been going to school for 2 nights/week in another town and his "college account" (money given to him by his family) has been paying for an apartment in that town so I didn't think he should have to pay for both. Because of this, I'm broke right now and can't afford to buy another bike. I would be able to afford it if I sold the old one we bought a while back, but he told me that if I sell that one that he'd want his half back (which I understand, it's fair). I know this all sounds SO effing materialistic. But this is really depressing me. My dream bike will be sitting in our garage in a few weeks/days and I won't be able to ride it. And I can't afford my own. It's like when I got him into Scuba diving recently (another hobby that I absolutely love, but he didn't when he met me). When I finally got him certified for his birthday, he loved it too and was telling me about how he was immediately going to get all these extra certifications that I can't afford to do with him right now. I'm really trying not to be jealous. I'm trying to be happy for him. I have barely mentioned this to him. But I am sick and tired of talking about his new future bike...about what color it's going to be...about the aftermarket exhaust he's going to put on it...about the cool graphics he's thinking about buying.... I feel like a jealous little kid!!!!!!!!!!!!! And I HATE IT
giotto Posted April 25, 2010 Posted April 25, 2010 can you ride his bike from time to time? Surely he would allow that?
Author Pleco Posted April 25, 2010 Author Posted April 25, 2010 can you ride his bike from time to time? Surely he would allow that? That's a definite NO. He wouldn't let me, and I wouldn't want to. Too big a risk, I'd never live it down if something were to happen. I'm just being dumb and childish. I wish I knew how to get over it.
giotto Posted April 25, 2010 Posted April 25, 2010 That's a definite NO. He wouldn't let me, and I wouldn't want to. Too big a risk, I'd never live it down if something were to happen. I'm just being dumb and childish. I wish I knew how to get over it. Well, it is childish... not much you wanting the bike, but the fact that you two don't seem to be prepared to share something which would give both of you great pleasure... if you cannot share at this level, what's going to happen in the future when you will have to face more serious and challenging issues? If I had a sports car, I would let my wife drive it... both of you are indeed too materialistic...
LucreziaBorgia Posted April 25, 2010 Posted April 25, 2010 So he lives with you, pays no rent or utilities (for either place), is getting 30K, he's getting handed a good job, is buying stuff for himself that he won't consider sharing with you? I'm not sure why you think you are the materialistic one. You are supporting a man who damn well should be helping you financially by paying some bills for the place he is living with you in. I'm not saying he should buy you stuff - but if he is Mr. Moneybags being handed a cushy job, there is no reason AT ALL you should be paying all of the rent and utilities if he lives with you. And if you sold your bike, he would insist on getting half back even though he doesn't really need it? I'm sorry, but this guy sounds really, really cheap and used to sponging off of people while getting things handed to him. I can't help but to wonder if you and he end up married, he will ask for a pre-nup.
Els Posted April 25, 2010 Posted April 25, 2010 He knows it's your dream bike and won't even let you borrow it sometimes? And it's sitting in YOUR garage, the bills for which YOU are paying!??! Uh, how are you the 'materialistic' one again?
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