EthanH Posted April 24, 2010 Posted April 24, 2010 Not sure if this is a common thing on here, at least I haven't seen a post like this before... I want to ask about the advice I should give my friends whose 'relationship' is a mess. I will post what I think, let me know... He is 20, she is 19. They have been together on and off (mostly on) for just under 2 years. We are all at the same college together. They have both hooked up with other people, although not officially together at the time, it was in a time when they were in limbo. It seems to me like everytime one of them wants to be with the other, the other gets doubts. He is probably worse, he goes out, partys hard, and gets a lot of attention from girls. He did cheat on her, but they are so confused as to what they 'are', that it is always seen by both of them as borderline. She is probably no better, she dresses in a way which attracts plenty of male attention. They are both young, but they clearly have something special, as they have always got back together. And when they have broken up, the odd thing is that I have always felt that both of them ultimately wanted to be with each other. They just play too many games. The problem is, and I think this is the main issue...she is going away on a year abroad in June, and when she comes back next year, he will move away to start the next stage of his studies... they are like passing ships in the night and I think that is on their mind the whole time. The reason to be faithful is diluted by the fact that they know there is no legs in the relationship. He said to me that he wouldn't even consider anyone else if she was staying here next year. They have just told each other they would be faithful to each other in the time they have left together in the same town, but to me, it all seems a little pointless...but I also know that if they give up, they are just going to spend their time thinking, wishing, hoping about each other. I told her to just be honest with her, he should care about her enough, if any of their relationship meant anything, he should deal with the reality of the situation.
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