tkgirl Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 Personality-wise: Wit. Intelligence combined a sense of humour, and mischief. But emphasis on politeness and courageousness. Women may not be delicate otherworldly creatures who can't hear the words "dick" or "balls", but one should obey the set boundaries when not yet completely familiar/comfortable with another person. Physical appearance: Nice hands and a good voice. Take my word for it. And bonus tip to any male: just wear a white shirt. Dress shirt, t-shirt, sweater- whatever it may be, just know that every man looks his absolute best in a white shirt. I actually prefer black shirts on guys myself... and as far as music goes... if he can appreciate Jack White's genius as much as I do that's a big plus!
Eeyore79 Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 I tend to notice guys who are confident, who have an attractive walk and good posture, a nice voice and a fun vibe about them. If a guy is wearing something that stands out, I usually notice that too, because he doesn't blend into the sea of guys who are all wearing the same thing. If he has a nice hat, a cool tshirt, or something else eyecatching, I might even strike up a conversation with him about it.
SouthernSunshine Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 Humor! I like a funny guy. I love Dane Cook! Aside from that, they have to be intelligent, good in bed, and have a career.
TheBigQuestion Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 I'm into black shirts myself (dress shirts, t-shirts, etc). Is this a mistake?
SomewhatExperienced Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 I love Dane Cook! I thought you said you liked funny guys?
MrNate Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 Personality-wise: Wit. Intelligence combined a sense of humour, and mischief. But emphasis on politeness and courageousness. Women may not be delicate otherworldly creatures who can't hear the words "dick" or "balls", but one should obey the set boundaries when not yet completely familiar/comfortable with another person. Physical appearance: Nice hands and a good voice. Take my word for it. And bonus tip to any male: just wear a white shirt. Dress shirt, t-shirt, sweater- whatever it may be, just know that every man looks his absolute best in a white shirt. lol we would definitely get along
MrNate Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 Humor! I like a funny guy. I love Dane Cook! Aside from that, they have to be intelligent, good in bed, and have a career. Why do you tease us with your profile picture?
zebracolors Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 Humor! I like a funny guy. I love Dane Cook! Aside from that, they have to be intelligent, good in bed, and have a career. IMO, Dane Cook is funny, except I would not want a guy who constantly says jokes that poke fun at women all the time. It would get old after a while. Don't get me wrong if a guy has me giggling, I love it. I admit women do some pretty weird or messed up things sometimes, and I can laugh at it because usually its true. But if he did that alot I would suspect he has some underlaying issues about respecting women, possibly. Other then that I would agree with everything S. Sunshine says, except the career part. I don't view that as criteria for me to have fun with a guy.
sagetalk Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 Humor! I like a funny guy. I love Dane Cook! Aside from that, they have to be intelligent, good in bed, and have a career. Madam, your avatar makes me proud to be southern born. If that isn't you, then thanks for the memories anyway .
Mutant Debutante Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 I thought you said you liked funny guys? hee hee hee hee ZING! No offense SS to each their own but in my opinion Dane Cook = d-bag. I prefer guys who dress a little dark, a little offbeat, although there's nothing wrong with a plain white shirt.
SouthernSunshine Posted April 21, 2010 Posted April 21, 2010 IMO, Dane Cook is funny, except I would not want a guy who constantly says jokes that poke fun at women all the time. It would get old after a while. Don't get me wrong if a guy has me giggling, I love it. I admit women do some pretty weird or messed up things sometimes, and I can laugh at it because usually its true. But if he did that alot I would suspect he has some underlaying issues about respecting women, possibly. Well, I don't find his jokes about women offensive. Madam, your avatar makes me proud to be southern born. If that isn't you, then thanks for the memories anyway:). It's me.. thanks. No offense SS to each their own but in my opinion Dane Cook = d-bag. No offense taken! I don't expect everyone to agree with me. I think DC is a D-bag too when he praises Obama.
SaintDragon Posted April 21, 2010 Posted April 21, 2010 I think the main thing about a man that woman like and make them think "I want that guy" is his nature to be a natural, friendly person and a guy that walks around proud and tall with a smile or a handshake when he meets someone new. A guy that DOES NOT slouch or thinks everything sucks. I also think if the woman sees the man doing something cool or that has a passion for something helps to sell that man to the woman's heart. And of course looks... That man has to have that edge, that face that goes with his heart.
sagetalk Posted April 21, 2010 Posted April 21, 2010 I'm a guy, so from that prospective I can say what I have found to be the most attractive things women have told me they like. Boldness would have be number 1. A timid guy is never going to get the girl unless he just gets lottery type odds. Timid is wimpy and wimpy is not hot to women. Also, never over analyze early in a relationship, let her do that. It will help your confidence which will make her even more attracted to you. Never be afraid to tell a girl you like her, want to ask her out, or to tell her you think she looks great (respectfully). She may blow you off, but then again, she may giggle and give you the time of your life. You never know until you try. It's hard to do (takes guts), but women love that stuff. They hate being lonely and when you ask them out, in their mind, you are acting attractive because you don't want them to be alone (you want them to be with you).
GrayClouds Posted April 21, 2010 Posted April 21, 2010 (edited) I like a funny guy. I love Dane Cook! . That statement is an oxymoron..... Well, I don't find his jokes about women offensive. . But him being called a comedian is offensive. http://www.misanthropytoday.com/why-dane-cook-sucks-and-is-unfunny/ Edited April 21, 2010 by GrayClouds
JohnP82 Posted April 21, 2010 Posted April 21, 2010 If the bands 'The Mars Volta' or 'At the Drive-In' mean anything positive to him. What about Sparta?
SouthernSunshine Posted April 21, 2010 Posted April 21, 2010 That statement is an oxymoron..... That was friggin funny! :lmao:
threebyfate Posted April 21, 2010 Posted April 21, 2010 Think Goldilocks and the Three Bears. "This porridge is too hot" "This porridge is too cold" "This porridge is just right!" Men are like bowls of porridge, a composite of oatmeal and other ingredients. Different women prefer oatmeal with milk, cream, brown sugar, processed sugar, eggs, etc. Each man has his own form of attractiveness since each woman will want something different. There are men who have relative universally appealing qualities but they're rare.
PJKino Posted April 21, 2010 Posted April 21, 2010 What gives you the impression of confidence? If you are meeting a guy for the first time how does he show confidence? Confidence a vague term and is just womenspeak fluff.. Good looking guy="confident" to them
USMCHokie Posted April 21, 2010 Posted April 21, 2010 Confidence a vague term and is just womenspeak fluff.. Good looking guy="confident" to them Ah, yes, I totally agree. The chain looks like this: Good looking --> attention from women --> confidence...
Stung Posted April 21, 2010 Posted April 21, 2010 Confidence a vague term and is just womenspeak fluff.. Good looking guy="confident" to them The OP asked for characteristics besides looks. Obviously, looks are important to some people, in varying degree, but looks and confidence are still separate qualities. Most women would like a man who has BOTH qualities, ideally. And it is frequent that good looks do go hand-in-hand with some degree of confidence, as the world does tend to reward and reinforce the importance of beauty in both sexes. However I believe there are several people IRL and on this board who can attest that good looks alone don't make up for inability to approach people, read interpersonal signals--and among more discerning folk, they don't make up for deficit of character, either.
PJKino Posted April 21, 2010 Posted April 21, 2010 (edited) The OP asked for characteristics besides looks. Obviously, looks are important to some people, in varying degree, but looks and confidence are still separate qualities. \qualities, ideally. And it is frequent that good looks do go hand-in-hand with some degree of confidence, as the world does tend to reward and reinforce the importance of beauty in both sexes. However I believe there are several people IRL and on this board who can attest that good looks alone don't make up for inability to approach people, read interpersonal signals--and among more discerning folk, they don't make up for deficit of character, either. But when first meeting or just looking at somebody the idea you can tell right away how much confidence a person has or doesnt have is impsosible to judge..Evne somebody who at firts is smooth with women can be a mess inside The confidence thing at first glance is fluff for wow hes hot Edited April 21, 2010 by PJKino
Stung Posted April 21, 2010 Posted April 21, 2010 But when first meeting or just looking at somebody the idea you can tell right away how much confidence a person has or doesnt have is impsosible to judge..Evne somebody who at firts is smooth with women can be a mess inside The confidence thing at first glance is fluff for wow hes hot Of course women can't peer into a man's soul with X-ray vision--unless we've got some pretty powerful glasses we have to go by outward cues we interpret as confidence. Usually these are things like how he carries himself, how directly he looks at us and others, his general bearing and mannerisms, whether he meets our smiles or fades nervous and flustered into the shadows, whether he seems at ease interacting with others, if he approaches or not. These are all elements of personal charisma. If a man looks away from eye contact, is flustered when somebody laughs near him, refuses to dance, can't catch the bartender's eye, etc.--a lot of women will interpret this as a lack of confidence. Later, as they get to know a man better, they might be surprised by what they find, but that is true of every aspect of anyone's character. Looks can certainly play into the confidence dynamic in complex ways, but it's a gross oversimplification to claim one is just a sock puppet of the other, and kind of insulting to dismissively insist that women as a whole can't, or won't, tell the difference between the two. I know I for one am comfortable with visually identifying men as hot, and admitting that physical attractiveness is a plus in a partner. But I'm drawn to a plain/average man with a certain pull to his charisma and an easy, confident way of carrying himself over a physically perfect chiseled man who is awkward, can't establish eye-contact, gets flustered or sullen in social interaction, etc.
USMCHokie Posted April 21, 2010 Posted April 21, 2010 Looks can certainly play into the confidence dynamic in complex ways, but it's a gross oversimplification to claim one is just a sock puppet of the other, and kind of insulting to dismissively insist that women as a whole can't, or won't, tell the difference between the two. I know I for one am comfortable with visually identifying men as hot, and admitting that physical attractiveness is a plus in a partner. But I'm drawn to a plain/average man with a certain pull to his charisma and an easy, confident way of carrying himself over a physically perfect chiseled man who is awkward, can't establish eye-contact, gets flustered or sullen in social interaction, etc. This has nothing to do with a woman's perception of a man's confidence...it has to do with a man's perception of himself and that perception's effect on his behavior and so-called "confidence." A staggering majority of people in modern society base their own worth on what others think of them. I doubt you can argue that attractive people generally get more attention and positive feedback from others. This attention and positive feedback will increase a man's self-worth and self-perception, thus making him feel more valuable, for lack of a better term, to others. This higher placed value will translate into more "confident" behavior, as the man has less fear of social rejection. So on a very basic, almost primal, level, looks can be a huge factor on a man's confidence. This is not to say that other factors may come into play...but the key to confidence is positive feedback from society...i.e., confidence breeds confidence...
PJKino Posted April 21, 2010 Posted April 21, 2010 Of course women can't peer into a man's soul with X-ray vision--unless we've got some pretty powerful glasses we have to go by outward cues we interpret as confidence. Usually these are things like how he carries himself, how directly he looks at us and others, his general bearing and mannerisms, whether he meets our smiles or fades nervous and flustered into the shadows, whether he seems at ease interacting with others, if he approaches or not. These are all elements of personal charisma. If a man looks away from eye contact, is flustered when somebody laughs near him, refuses to dance, can't catch the bartender's eye, etc.--a lot of women will interpret this as a lack of confidence. Later, as they get to know a man better, they might be surprised by what they find, but that is true of every aspect of anyone's character. Looks can certainly play into the confidence dynamic in complex ways, but it's a gross oversimplification to claim one is just a sock puppet of the other, and kind of insulting to dismissively insist that women as a whole can't, or won't, tell the difference between the two. I know I for one am comfortable with visually identifying men as hot, and admitting that physical attractiveness is a plus in a partner. But I'm drawn to a plain/average man with a certain pull to his charisma and an easy, confident way of carrying himself over a physically perfect chiseled man who is awkward, can't establish eye-contact, gets flustered or sullen in social interaction, etc. No im not saying women cant tell the difference bewteen confidence and looks im sayign its womenspeak meaning women dont want to come out and just say i liek him becasue hes so hot[which theres nothign worng with] if they say he has confidence it seems a little less shallow..
PJKino Posted April 21, 2010 Posted April 21, 2010 (edited) This has nothing to do with a woman's perception of a man's confidence...it has to do with a man's perception of himself and that perception's effect on his behavior and so-called "confidence." A staggering majority of people in modern society base their own worth on what others think of them. I doubt you can argue that attractive people generally get more attention and positive feedback from others. This attention and positive feedback will increase a man's self-worth and self-perception, thus making him feel more valuable, for lack of a better term, to others. This higher placed value will translate into more "confident" behavior, as the man has less fear of social rejection. So on a very basic, almost primal, level, looks can be a huge factor on a man's confidence. This is not to say that other factors may come into play...but the key to confidence is positive feedback from society...i.e., confidence breeds confidence... Great point.. Ive never had a women except a drunk one once who then acted like it was the worst decison of her life and she only did it becasue of the alcohol.. Ive heard women behind my back make comments about me not beign attractive.. How exactly am i supposed to have confidence with women? It would make no sense i have nothing but failure and negative feedback to go on.. Edited April 21, 2010 by PJKino
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