This Hurts Posted April 19, 2010 Posted April 19, 2010 This is such a weird feeling. I've been feeling this way at least faintly since the breakup, but sometimes it gets worst. I feel like I'm just walking through a dream or something odd like that, especially in the mornings and during class sometimes. Anybody else feel this way? If you have before but don't anymore, when did you feel it and how did you make it stop? I see my counselor/therapist for the first time tomorrow, so hopefully I'll get a little help out of that. I just really hope I don't have some sort of depersonalization disorder or anything along those lines. Phew.
Odyssey Posted April 19, 2010 Posted April 19, 2010 yeah...i think all of us have felt it sometimes. For me, it was like i was just going through the motions day after day. numb. mindless. like some zombie. It lingered during the early few months of nc. I can't remember when it disappeared though. (you're not alone).
skydiveaddict Posted April 19, 2010 Posted April 19, 2010 Yes I have felt that way too. Kind of like you're looking at yourself through another person's eyes. I bet it's from the stress you are enduring
bluz73 Posted April 19, 2010 Posted April 19, 2010 Yes I have felt that way too. Kind of like you're looking at yourself through another person's eyes. I bet it's from the stress you are enduring honey I feel like this everyday, its been 6 months, I am so stressed cause I hate living in the same town as him and his teenybopper. I wake up sometimes in a panic wondering if this is real, did i just waste my time for this idiot and then realize itsover I have to keep moving on
skydiveaddict Posted April 19, 2010 Posted April 19, 2010 honey I feel like this everyday, its been 6 months, I am so stressed cause I hate living in the same town as him and his teenybopper. I wake up sometimes in a panic wondering if this is real, did i just waste my time for this idiot and then realize itsover I have to keep moving on Hey I believe you. It's almost like PTSD. Constant stress that wears you down mentally and physically as well.
onewillburn Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 It's a common feeling, I think. Especially if you were really close (or even dependent, in a way) with your significant other. I once described this feeling as akin to being dropped onto a foreign planet where I knew nobody and felt no connection with anything. A lot of my friends had moved away, ex broke up with me, etc. It was a very trying time for me but I can tell you that if you're smart about letting yourself heal and learning the right things about what you did wrong and what the other person did wrong, you will come out a much stronger person. I truly believe that with adversity comes strength in character (for most people anyway). Are you into any kind of art? Reading, listening to and playing music, and watching movies really helped me get through the loneliness. Hang in there, either way.
Author This Hurts Posted April 20, 2010 Author Posted April 20, 2010 yeah...i think all of us have felt it sometimes. For me, it was like i was just going through the motions day after day. numb. mindless. like some zombie. It lingered during the early few months of nc. I can't remember when it disappeared though. (you're not alone). I actually have gone through this before. Last year while my ex was going through a manic episode and we stopped talking for a couple of months, that's exactly how it felt—just going through the motions day after day, like thoughtless routines. This time is different, though. It's more intense, sometimes I feel like I'm really dreaming. Scary stuff! Now that you don't feel it anymore, what are your days like? Might sound like a dumb question, but last year she never gave me time to get over that stage since she eventually came back, so I don't know how one feels once the "dream-like state" subsides. If it doesn't feel like mindless living, are the days filled with more purpose? Yes I have felt that way too. Kind of like you're looking at yourself through another person's eyes. I bet it's from the stress you are enduring It probably is the stress. I'm probably stressing myself out more than I should. People go through stresses like "What's my ex doing? Who are they with? Do they still love me?" or "I'm so sad. I'm so lonely. I wish somebody loved me." well I go through those plus constant dwelling on my past and future. It's ridiculous. i think WAY too much and it doesn't do me good. I'll try to resolve that in therapy, though. honey I feel like this everyday, its been 6 months, I am so stressed cause I hate living in the same town as him and his teenybopper. I wake up sometimes in a panic wondering if this is real, did i just waste my time for this idiot and then realize itsover I have to keep moving on I know how you feel. It hits me almost every morning... "Is this really happening?" But it hasn't even been a month for me, yet, and things are a lot better compared to the first few days, which were complete and utter AGONY. Have you seen a therapist? I've heard they help a lot. Like I said, my first appointment isn't until tomorrow, but everybody says they help and maybe you should look into it, too. Hey I believe you. It's almost like PTSD. Constant stress that wears you down mentally and physically as well. This might sound dumb, but for a little bit I actually thought I had a slight PTSD. This b*tch (for lack of a better word) really did f*ck with my mind. She didn't hit me or anything like that, but the emotional distress she made me go through was terrible. She drained me everyday but I loved her and I was so dedicated to stay by her side despite her disorder, that I stayed. This might be a bit too exaggerating, but sometimes I wonder if she really traumatized me in one way or another with the way she treated me and the things she did or said.
skydiveaddict Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 This might sound dumb, but for a little bit I actually thought I had a slight PTSD. This b*tch (for lack of a better word) really did f*ck with my mind. She didn't hit me or anything like that, but the emotional distress she made me go through was terrible. She drained me everyday but I loved her and I was so dedicated to stay by her side despite her disorder, that I stayed. This might be a bit too exaggerating, but sometimes I wonder if she really traumatized me in one way or another with the way she treated me and the things she did or said. Doesn't sound dumb to me at all
Author This Hurts Posted April 20, 2010 Author Posted April 20, 2010 It's a common feeling, I think. Especially if you were really close (or even dependent, in a way) with your significant other. I once described this feeling as akin to being dropped onto a foreign planet where I knew nobody and felt no connection with anything. A lot of my friends had moved away, ex broke up with me, etc. It was a very trying time for me but I can tell you that if you're smart about letting yourself heal and learning the right things about what you did wrong and what the other person did wrong, you will come out a much stronger person. I truly believe that with adversity comes strength in character (for most people anyway). Are you into any kind of art? Reading, listening to and playing music, and watching movies really helped me get through the loneliness. Hang in there, either way. Fantastic analogy. That's exactly what I feel like, actually. I feel like I'm living in another world and nothing is familiar. My home, my friends, my family, my school, my daily routine—everything is the same, but nothing feels the same. It's odd, really. And it pisses me off that she has so much control over my mindset, but like you said, I'm just hoping I'll come out of this a bigger and better person. I do like art. I love reading and I play a few instruments. It's hard to right now because for some reason (I really don't know WHY, my ex wasn't into music like this at all), it reminds me of my ex. But reading does get my mind off things if I concentrate on it. I like watching YouTube videos on things that interest me, too, like religious debates (lol). Movies, on the other hand, tend to depress me. One step at a time, though! Thank you for being encouraging, it really does help. Baby steps, baby steps...
bluz73 Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 Doesn't sound dumb to me at all i think i shall go skydiving, maybe that will help relieve my stress. I did something crazy today and got word to my ex's friend (i know he will tell him) That I have a bf and am engaged haha..its not true but i just wonder and even hope he chokes on the thought tonight!
SadKitty78 Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 This is such a weird feeling. I've been feeling this way at least faintly since the breakup, but sometimes it gets worst. I feel like I'm just walking through a dream or something odd like that, especially in the mornings and during class sometimes. Yes, when he broke up with me, and the subsequent days following the breakup, I've been feeling like I'm NOT in my body. I'm walking, going through the motions of my daily life, but I feel as if I'm almost observing myself. I think when the mind and emotions go through a traumatic experience, this seems to happen.
skydiveaddict Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 i think i shall go skydiving, maybe that will help relieve my stress. I did something crazy today and got word to my ex's friend (i know he will tell him) That I have a bf and am engaged haha..its not true but i just wonder and even hope he chokes on the thought tonight! HELL YEA you should go skydiving. No better stress relief on (or above) this planet. New any advice or have questions let me know
bluz73 Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 HELL YEA you should go skydiving. No better stress relief on (or above) this planet. New any advice or have questions let me know me and the ex did bungee jumping..i always wanted to do skydiving..i will one day. As for a question..my white lie i told bout having a new man and being engaged...Do you think it will bother him at all even thought he has a gf?
monkeymaid Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 you know, i have been taking a daily invintory of my emotions morning and night and i actually remember the days i felt this way and the days i dont. you dont have any disorders. ...in fact, you are a normal healthy human being who fell in love and is in the throws of a breakup. its like getting tossed around in the ocean. ..it has no disregard for you or your feelings or your agenda. it just takes you and does with you what it likes. ...when you decide to relax through it, is when you actually weather a chance of survival. thats when you conserve oxygen and are able to notice the bubbles floating up. once you get your bearings, you just go up with the bubbles and take your first real deep breath in a LOOOOOOOOOOONG time! and let me tell you, that breath feels ****ing amazing!!!!!!!!!
skydiveaddict Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 me and the ex did bungee jumping..i always wanted to do skydiving..i will one day. As for a question..my white lie i told bout having a new man and being engaged...Do you think it will bother him at all even thought he has a gf? Yes I bet it would bother him
monkeymaid Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 this sounds kind of low. ...why would you do that? arent you better than that?
bluz73 Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 Yes I bet it would bother him i know it was stupid of me but i know its over and we wont ever get back together, i just wanted him to maybe feel a day a minute or an hour of my pain, if he does at all. He prob dont care and wont lose sleep over it, but i feel i been hit by a mack truck and need relief
bluz73 Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 this sounds kind of low. ...why would you do that? arent you better than that? was that comment made to me? if so i made a foolish choice to tell a huge white lie, just maybe to hear his reaction or have him lose sleep. Not that he will he got his gf, but it was a mistake i guess and i am better than that
onewillburn Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 was that comment made to me? if so i made a foolish choice to tell a huge white lie, just maybe to hear his reaction or have him lose sleep. Not that he will he got his gf, but it was a mistake i guess and i am better than that There's no such thing as a "huge" white lie. You told a straight out lie. No offense, but that was really immature and pointless and the truth will eventually come out. You really shouldn't be stooping to the point of trying to make your ex jealous. I'm not trying to make you feel bad, but you need to focus on actually moving on, not telling stories to make your ex "lose sleep".
bluz73 Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 There's no such thing as a "huge" white lie. You told a straight out lie. No offense, but that was really immature and pointless and the truth will eventually come out. You really shouldn't be stooping to the point of trying to make your ex jealous. I'm not trying to make you feel bad, but you need to focus on actually moving on, not telling stories to make your ex "lose sleep". It was a huge white lie and i messed up..but i hope within the next year i can find a guy who would marry me and make it true. I guess i had a bad day and wanted to piss him off. He is a blind idiot and i deserve better, i just hope tommorrow i feel better.
ann09 Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 The hardest part of breaking up is that life still goes on. Its almost surreal to feel so heartbroken but still expected to continue with every mundane task. Yes - detached from reality is a very real feeling. We're allowed plenty of grieving time when someone dies....but when a relationship dies you're expected to keep on going.
EthanH Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 I think it is a normal feeling. This is a time of great stress. I for one feel emotionally exhausted atm. I don't think I'm sleeping properly. I feel like the only way to get through atm is just to not think about things. So yeah, i feel like i'm walking around in a daze, i think that is natural.
stillafool Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 It was a huge white lie and i messed up..but i hope within the next year i can find a guy who would marry me and make it true. I guess i had a bad day and wanted to piss him off. He is a blind idiot and i deserve better, i just hope tommorrow i feel better. Whoa! Why do you want to be married so soon? You have to get over this guy first before you move to someone else. I think you should just concentrate on getting yourself together and heal.
stillafool Posted April 20, 2010 Posted April 20, 2010 was that comment made to me? if so i made a foolish choice to tell a huge white lie, just maybe to hear his reaction or have him lose sleep. Not that he will he got his gf, but it was a mistake i guess and i am better than that bluz really? Don't do these types of things. He is going to think the 18 year old is more mature than you. Just move on and leave them alone. You are far better than that.
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