Agent Thomas Posted April 17, 2010 Posted April 17, 2010 (edited) Or do I? My gf has never given me a reason to not trust her. Her ex hounds her every now and then to try to get back with her though. He tells her he loves her still, etc. And they were together for years. She told him no, though, and that she loved me. Secondly, theres this guy who texts her all the time. Like all day. She thought they were just friends but I knew he was texting her too much. Well he tells her he likes her. She tells him sorry let's just be friends. It pisses me off because he knew she had a bf. I am not upset with her nor do I not trust her. But I want to break the bones of these guys. I seriously have urges to literally get violent and break them. What should I do? How do I just not care? Edited April 17, 2010 by Agent Thomas
ADF Posted April 17, 2010 Posted April 17, 2010 What you should do is explain to your GF what every man already knows--i.e that men, especially young men, almost never go out of their way to befriend women unless they are attracted to them. Almost never. Your GF should understand that any man who makes a special effort to spend time with her most likely has an agenda. If she says "no" to him, and he is mature enough to let it go, great. If not, she might have to cut him off. If she doesn't, he will interpret her willingness to stay in touch with him as a sign of interest. Your GF has done nothing wrong. She has been pursued lately by a couple of men who had a very poor sense of boundaries. It sounds like she handled it as well as she could. The guys were jerks. You can't go through life punching every jerk that you come across. Let her handle it. It sounds like she's dealing with them just fine.
PandorasBox Posted April 17, 2010 Posted April 17, 2010 Its good you reconize your beef is with these other guys and not with her. It would be different if she was responding to them in a different way of course. I say let it go. There is no reason for violence at all, it solves nothing. I understand you're upset with these guys and the things they are doing and saying. She has told them no and that she loved you. I would just concentrate on that.
Bryanp Posted April 17, 2010 Posted April 17, 2010 If the roles were reversed would your girlfriend be accepting to having your ex constantly hound you asking to come back and you constantly being texted by another woman who says how much she likes you? What is wrong with this picture?
sally4sara Posted April 17, 2010 Posted April 17, 2010 I do get that you feel these fellas are disrespecting you. I agree they are. Unless this emotion manifests within you over things that do not involve blatant attempts by outside parties, I wouldn't just write you off as a jealous person. One thing you need to remember is these guys don't know you to have a sense of honor about your position in things. And there are plenty of people out there that could support someone's belief that a person being in a relationship doesn't necessarily mean it is an obstacle to their agenda. It feels personal to you, but in their eyes and because they don't know you, it isn't necessarily a personal offense. Try to just be happy you have a partner that sets interested fellows straight and not let it bother you on such a personal level. The simple fact that your partner DOES set them straight means she is a desirable commodity in the dating world and you have what others want. If she wasn't this way, you'd be dealing with it less, getting cheated on, or dropped for someone else.
Author Agent Thomas Posted April 17, 2010 Author Posted April 17, 2010 Thank you all for your replies, they have brought me insight as well as resolve in this situation. As for you bryan, you said: If the roles were reversed would your girlfriend be accepting to having your ex constantly hound you asking to come back and you constantly being texted by another woman who says how much she likes you? What is wrong with this picture? She is jealous too. But one day she said "I need to not be jealous. I need to trust you. Because I have guy friends too, and I just expect you to trust me because I know I'd never do anything with any of them"
dazed1989 Posted April 17, 2010 Posted April 17, 2010 I too have problems with this, but I'd be appreciative of the fact that she tells them she has a man. She definitely sounds like she deals with the issue well. I have a girlfriend who expects me to pound every guy who hits on her, she'll never do anything about it herself. Be thankful she isn't like that!
Author Agent Thomas Posted April 17, 2010 Author Posted April 17, 2010 I too have problems with this, but I'd be appreciative of the fact that she tells them she has a man. She definitely sounds like she deals with the issue well. I have a girlfriend who expects me to pound every guy who hits on her, she'll never do anything about it herself. Be thankful she isn't like that! Lmfao feel free to trade. I have deep anger issues and love proving my manhood to myself by being evil and threatening. At least your girl gives you a chance to tell these guys to F off. I can't tell that jackass who likes her, a single thing! Cuz she strictly sees him as a friend and doesn't understand why I want to own his life.
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