Eb0ny Posted April 17, 2010 Posted April 17, 2010 So hey everyone. I've been lurking here, reading the threads and finally plucked up the courage to ask a question. I'm not normally one to ask for advice, but I am actually really stuck here, and going a little crazy. Sorry if this is long, and thanks for bearing with me! So last year I was in a relationship with this guy for about 3 months. He turned out to be a complete prick, and treated me really badly (e.g. he basically used me for money and lifts) and I haven't spoken to him since December. We left on ok terms, but not friends or anything. I haven't dated since then, but I ran into his friend recently at college. His friend I always suspected had a little thing for me. He would always compliment me and pay lots of attention to me, i.e. tell me I looked nice and compare to his previous girlfriends and say how I was much better. He actually was a LOT nicer than my boyfriend, who never said anything nice to me. But of course nothing happened... So anyway it is now 5 months later and I ran into this friend. We caught up, and talked for like an hour. He briefly mentioned my ex and says he doesn't see him often, and that he heard about what happened with us and that he's a real idiot. Then we ran into each other a couple more times and he invited me to a party at his house. I went, hoping something would happen, but it didn't... and he kept telling people how he met me (through my ex) to the point where I actually asked him not to tell the story, as I really didn't think it was necessary. He said that my ex was nice and he had a lot of respect for him, something that really suprised me. I said, well you obviously don't know what happened with us, and he said he didn't but he is glad he didn't. I might add he said this when he was quite drunk, but we all know that's when the truth comes out. Anyway, I just find it really weird, because this guy used to pay me a lot of attention, but at the party it almost seemed like he didn't even know me. I know it's hard when you're the host of something, but he barely spoke to me the entire night. He's always complaining that he can't get a girl, and he knows I'm single. I'm just really confused by the entire thing. I was so sure he liked me... So, my questions are: 1) Is going out with your friend's ex girlfriend a "no go" zone? Is this why all of a sudden he's acting weird? Like I said they don't talk anymore and they're not great friends. 2) Why did this guy always pay attention to me and suddenly doesn't when he can actually have me? 3) Is it worth pursuing this guy? I haven't seen him since the party, but I'm always looking out for him (I'm a bit of a stalker I think lol) I don't know what to do/say if I see him next. I've never made a move on a guy before... Thanks for your help!
Agent Thomas Posted April 17, 2010 Posted April 17, 2010 Generally yes you should stay away from a friends ex. The better friends you are with a person, the further you should stay away from their ex. I would never screw over my two best friends by getting with their gf's. As for why your ex's friend is acting this way now... there are many possible reasons. Who knows what has changed in his mind since when he was hitting on you a lot. It could be anything. It's worth giving it a shot. You should just talk to him a bit next time you see him and ask if he'd wanna get a drink sometime. If he says no, then it's most likely just cuz he's your ex's friend. Doesn't mean anything is wrong with you. Give it a shot, it's all you can do
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