rivermagic Posted April 17, 2010 Posted April 17, 2010 So this is the deal, I dumped my boyfriend 2 weeks ago. We were in a fight, and I got so mad I told him to make arrangements to get his things. He then said "he tried to make things work, he only came back the last time because I was pregnant with his child." He said he would get his things when he got back from his work. About a week later he came back to tell me that he would not be picking his stuff up for another two days. He did not show up at all. In fact a day after he was supposed to get his things he was around the area driving around. About 5 days after that he showed up a little happier this time, it was kind of a fake happy. He explained the reason why he did not pick up his stuff was, because he was working. He told me where he had been during the time he was gone. He said he would get his mom's truck and get his things in a few days. I told him I would not be here on the day he was getting his things. He then asked where I was going. I told him. I volunteered to leave the keys for him. He said ok, and I will leave the money on the table that I owe you. He then said that he would try to get it as soon as he can. Due to the fact that he didn't know how much of a hurry I was in to get it out. He then asked how I was doing....also what I had been up to. Then he left. Yesterday I sent him a message about how where we would not be together, and I would add him to facebook to tag him in pictures once the baby is born, so that he can see him. He then writes back, No,,i wanna be there i dont wanna just see pic of it. I dont understand how he can tell me "he really does love me, even though sometimes he dont show it" then all of a sudden tell me he was only with me for the baby. Does this guy want to get back with me?
TooMuchPride Posted April 17, 2010 Posted April 17, 2010 WOAHHH first off the afcebook baby tagging thing WAS A BIG MISTAKE. its obvious you still love this guy cause ur in this forum , its been 2 weeks , the best thing you could haave done was go contact if not possible little contact , then if he missed you he would have tried to get your attention somehow, its his baby ofcourse he would want to be there, that doesnt mean he misses you thought , unless he is dangerous you should let him be their id tell you to go no contact and you would soon see him ask you to work it out by saying something like "for the babys sake" , but after the facebook tagging statement idk , the fact that he has not come for his stuff may be a sign he isnt ready to let go if he didnt have a valid reason , but if there is a child involved just sit him down and have a serious rational conversation about it.
2sunny Posted April 17, 2010 Posted April 17, 2010 place his things on the doorstep and tell him if he doesn't pick them up by the end of the day - you will donate them to charity. that's it. simple. easy solution.
LoveLace Posted April 17, 2010 Posted April 17, 2010 I agree with 2Sunny, but let him be a part of the child's life, for real, not on FB. You can be 2 civil parents that are not a couple anymore. Not saying that's easy, but it does take work to make that work. It seems better for everyone involved. I would take what he said personally, even if he didn't mean it at the time or just saying it to hack you off, that's not a statement to play around with, and a person who uses a phrase like that weather they mean it or not, is not someone you want to be with anyhow.
2sunny Posted April 17, 2010 Posted April 17, 2010 and it doesn't matter if he misses you or not - that is beside the point. you train someone in how you will or will not be treated. since you said "pick up your things" and he disregarded you - he now understands that your word means nothing - and he doesn't need to do things that you ask him to do. since he hasn't picked them up - simply place his things at the curb. give him the afternoon to swing by and get them. if he doesn't - it is free reign for anyone that needs the stuff more than he does. action. if he's unwilling to make the effort - someone who is willing to pick it up will come by and make the effort to pick it up. strangers are very grateful for free stuff.
Woggle Posted April 17, 2010 Posted April 17, 2010 I am sorry about your situation. I read your old posts and it is clear that you still have feelings for this guy but you don't tell a guy to get out and then expect everything to be okay afterwards. Never bring up a seperation with a man unless you truly mean it.
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