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Why do i always end up in awkward silences?


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Posted

Hi im 15 and I am dont know what to talk about with girls. I am a shy person normally even with other guys and I have decided it is time i started socialising more with girls. Whenever I talk to new people especially girls I always end up in an awkward silence. I just dont know what to talk about. The advice i always get is to talk about what i am interested in but im not really interested in that much. Especially stuff that would interest other people. Please help

Posted
The advice i always get is to talk about what i am interested in

 

That is terrible advice. You never talk about yourself, always talk about them. Get really good at simply asking questions to move a conversation along. Everybody's favorite subject is themselves, so all you have to do is ask questions and they'll do all the talking.

Posted

It's great that you are looking to start doing this. At that age, I was starting to mingle more. What I found helpful was taking up a competitive sport. I spoke to girls there and other guys and had heaps of fun in a social environment. Also, do find some interests, whether it be music, sports, art ,a subject, whatever it is, it's always good to have interests. Not so that you can only talk about them if people want to get to know you better but so that you build your confidence up.

 

I agree with Rorsch. Ask questions about other people and really listen to what they way. Show genuine interest. A good way is to ask and to also offer a bit of information. Generally, someone would ask you questions in return to get to know you and to keep the conversation going.

 

An important thing is to not let those awkward silences get to you. I've been in situations before that the other person just doesn't offer much to talk about and once I see that I am the only one trying to have a conversation, it makes me uncomfortable. But, some people are just like that. Awkward silences happen. Take the time to keep talking and to keep going. There are always positives even in what seems to be a pitfall and any little improvement is a step forward.

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