NABDP Posted April 15, 2010 Posted April 15, 2010 Having the lows today and hating myself for it! The basic story (no full thread here), dated a girl for 4 years, was engaged the last 1, 2 months from the wedding she started disappearing and texting with another guy. Stopped short of learning more to protect myself but once she stopped spending the night here at the house every night I asked her to move out. All this while, she kept telling me that I was wrong, obviously not the full story but that she was NOT with someone else (though a close mutual friend of hers told me otherwise). After she moved out, and into her own place (I originally thought with OM, now I know otherwise) I set up an online dating profile (too soon I realize). She discovered and got angry about this then apologized. A few days later, I was searching and up popped HER profile. This made me think, why would she be online here if she was starting a new R with the OM? She wouldn't. I texted her to ask, why are you on the site? Her reply was, the same reason you are, I guess. I wrote back: Oh, I thought you were with OM. She responded: I have been telling you all along that's not the case. Today I went back to the dating site again and search and she was again ONLINE - I am sure she is getting lots of offers for dates as she is gorgeous. Why does that bother me so much? I guess that's just something I have to work on. The other thing is that it's now very clear to me she is not involved with OM -- And that's the whole reason I kicked her out to begin with. I mean at least if she is broken up with OM that gives us the opportunity to talk, right? I want to at least do that, and get closure, but now I am in NC, and don't want to break that. There are questions I really want to ask, things I'd like to know...But I feel like I'd be such a weakling for asking. I mean this whole thing started because I thought she was seeing this other guy, now it turns out I might have been wrong? I mean there was definite evidence of deceit for sure which is tough to get over but I never really told her, get away from the OM and we can talk. I just told her to leave. What do I do? I'd look like a weak fool if I contacted first, wouldn't I? I feel like I need some sort of closure on this, to know what really happened in her own words and honestly hear what I did to lead her down that path, in order to improve myself at least for my next R. I never even got the chance to have that talk. Is it too late or now that she and OM are not together is it a chance I have to get this?
U2RockZz Posted April 15, 2010 Posted April 15, 2010 you said ,you had a proof...that is all you need my friend..one shot is more than enough, i guess
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