shadowplay Posted April 13, 2010 Posted April 13, 2010 that's all. I'm a rotten person. I'm totally weak and unworthy. It doesn't matter how much I love somebody. They will just use, abuse or betray me, because I'm weak.
quankanne Posted April 13, 2010 Posted April 13, 2010 everyone is worthy of love. We just need to be a bit smarter about who we share the gift with *hugs* quank
Woggle Posted April 13, 2010 Posted April 13, 2010 Yes you do. You just got involved with a baby who does not know what the hell he wants. Don't blame yourself.
Author shadowplay Posted April 13, 2010 Author Posted April 13, 2010 Yes you do. You just got involved with a baby who does not know what the hell he wants. Don't blame yourself. I thought you said his reasons were justified? Your thread about talking to other people in a happy relationship about how they can go on when there is so much misery got to me, because that's how I feel now. I mean I totally, totally trusted this guy and he just pulled a 180 on me. It just goes to show that you can never fully trust somebody, and you don't ever know what they're like until things get hard.
Woggle Posted April 13, 2010 Posted April 13, 2010 I thought you said his reasons were justified? Your thread about talking to other people in a happy relationship about how they can go on when there is so much misery got to me, because that's how I feel now. I mean I totally, totally trusted this guy and he just pulled a 180 on me. It just goes to show that you can never fully trust somebody, and you don't ever know what they're like until things get hard. If I look at it objectively I can actually see both sides but that does not mean you don't deserve love.
Author shadowplay Posted April 13, 2010 Author Posted April 13, 2010 If I look at it objectively I can actually see both sides but that does not mean you don't deserve love. I just can't get over how somebody you totally trust can rip your heart out and not care.
skydiveaddict Posted April 13, 2010 Posted April 13, 2010 I just can't get over how somebody you totally trust can rip your heart out and not care. I must agree. same thing happened to me
USMCHokie Posted April 13, 2010 Posted April 13, 2010 I just can't get over how somebody you totally trust can rip your heart out and not care. And this is often one of the toughest things to deal with...
jlr Posted April 13, 2010 Posted April 13, 2010 I feel this way sometimes too. And then someone I love, a friend, or family member, snaps me out of it. We all are capable of being loved and loving. True love is waiting for us. For some us though, it just takes longer to happen. Hang in there.
quankanne Posted April 13, 2010 Posted April 13, 2010 simple: You realize that they never truly gave love ... just a very convincing facsimile of it. your comment about not knowing someone until you have a hard experience together is so true. Same thing about not really knowing them unless you've traveled together for a few days ... because it's those times when their true nature comes out ... I wish I could reassure you that at some point in the future you're going to look at all this and smile, knowing that God or the fates or some higher power was looking after you and got you out of a relationship that wasn't going meant for you, but I understand how we've got to grieve these things first. however, I will say this: Every failed "love" relationship you experience brings you one step closer to the love you're ultimately meant to have. Even when you think you can't breathe because it hurts so much, and you're telling yourself you're unworthy of love.
Author shadowplay Posted April 13, 2010 Author Posted April 13, 2010 And this is often one of the toughest things to deal with... and then deny you the opportunity to express your pain. It makes you wonder how many people would turn on you give the chance.
quankanne Posted April 13, 2010 Posted April 13, 2010 a decent person wouldn't. a selfish shxt would ...
marlena Posted April 13, 2010 Posted April 13, 2010 It has nothing to do with worth. Some find love, some don't. Some who find it are worthless losers while others who never do are exceptional people. Your worth as a person is not measured by another person's love. It's measured by the love you have for yourself, for who you are, your accomplishments, talents, and virtues. This guy was too "little" for you, Shadow. Really, he was.
twhisperer Posted April 13, 2010 Posted April 13, 2010 OP haven't you seen the scene in HJNTIY when the little boy pushes the girl down and then laughs at her, meanwhile she has tears swelling in her eyes in bewilderment? .............................feel better sweetie.
deux ex machina Posted April 13, 2010 Posted April 13, 2010 It hurts to see you hurting. What happened would make anyone feel shocked, bewildered, and at a loss. You're not weak. You're human. It's okay if things don't feel okay for a while. Be gentle with yourself right now.
CollectiveVelvet Posted April 13, 2010 Posted April 13, 2010 I thought you said his reasons were justified? Your thread about talking to other people in a happy relationship about how they can go on when there is so much misery got to me, because that's how I feel now. I mean I totally, totally trusted this guy and he just pulled a 180 on me. It just goes to show that you can never fully trust somebody, and you don't ever know what they're like until things get hard. I think it's time to chat about what love and trust is in a romantic relationship. Your self-value should not ever be given over to another person. You should offer trust and time and attention when it is warranted but it sounds like perhaps you wrap your whole identity into a relationship. What is it that you are offering? What is it that you are giving? What are you expecting in return? Honestly, you aren't in any shape to engage in a new relationship at this point and methinks it is time to do some evaluation of the way the romantic world works in your mind.
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