EyeAlone Posted April 9, 2010 Posted April 9, 2010 Here's my story: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t226973/ It's been 5 days of NC and it's getting worse and worse. Last night I had my first dream of him post-breakup and now I just want to crumble. I've been keeping myself very busy with school and going to the gym, but it's not working. I'm not at peace with the breakup anymore. I just want him to come back. My mom keeps telling me the same old thing: you will heal and one day you'll find a guy that sincerely loves and appreciates you. Those are lies. Some people never get over their exes. Some people stay single and lonely for the rest of their lives. How do I know that I'm not one of those people??
shadowplay Posted April 9, 2010 Posted April 9, 2010 Here's my story: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t226973/ It's been 5 days of NC and it's getting worse and worse. Last night I had my first dream of him post-breakup and now I just want to crumble. I've been keeping myself very busy with school and going to the gym, but it's not working. I'm not at peace with the breakup anymore. I just want him to come back. My mom keeps telling me the same old thing: you will heal and one day you'll find a guy that sincerely loves and appreciates you. Those are lies. Some people never get over their exes. Some people stay single and lonely for the rest of their lives. How do I know that I'm not one of those people?? Wow, I could have written this. It's been 36 hours since he dumped me, and I feel like I don't see any end in sight to the pain.
GrayClouds Posted April 9, 2010 Posted April 9, 2010 Here's my story: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t226973/ It's been 5 days of NC and it's getting worse and worse. Last night I had my first dream of him post-breakup and now I just want to crumble. I've been keeping myself very busy with school and going to the gym, but it's not working. I'm not at peace with the breakup anymore. I just want him to come back. My mom keeps telling me the same old thing: you will heal and one day you'll find a guy that sincerely loves and appreciates you. Those are lies. Some people never get over their exes. Some people stay single and lonely for the rest of their lives. How do I know that I'm not one of those people?? First it has only been one day, it feels worst because your going through withdraw symptoms. Give yourself time. In fact much of what your feeling at this point is body chemistry reacting to the break up, it is the same as what happens during the fight or flight response. Be kind to yourself, allow yourself to feel bad for a bit. That is ok, you are grieving. Second, yes some never get over their EX but those people are do not allow themselves to heal. You can do things to assure that you heal tath you do. Start journalism your feelings, make sure you eat good food at regular periods, get outside and walk or run, hit a gym, hang around with people who care for you and can remind you how great you are. It does get easier. Your not alone in what your feeling.
Author EyeAlone Posted April 13, 2010 Author Posted April 13, 2010 God damn. So maybe I was actually improving but he called me the other day. I didn't answer but he left a voicemail saying that he was checking in with me to see how I was doing and that he missed our conversations that we used to have. WTF HOW SELFISH. Ugh I'm sorry but that really, really hurt and angered me. I'm mad that he tried to contact me because he should know that I don't want to talk to him. I even told him that we shouldn't talk. He knows that I'm sad but he's just calling to fulfill his selfish needs. Ugh it's been a few days since I cried and now it's starting up all over again. Just the fact that he broke NC opened up a bunch of wounds.
cdt76 Posted April 13, 2010 Posted April 13, 2010 The wounds are not closed or healed. They are open and fresh and very tender. Knowing this, you know what makes you hurt. You know he contacted you out of selfishness and to "check in on you" to make sure you were ok. But he doesn't care for you like you want him to. You know this because he broke your love. Understand what you need. You need to heal and hearing from his doesn't allow you to. Don't listen to his messages anymore. Don't call him. We are here for you and specifically my thoughts and prayers are with you.
Author EyeAlone Posted April 13, 2010 Author Posted April 13, 2010 Thanks cdt. I appreciate the thoughts and prayers! I deleted his messages so I won't be tempted to listen to them. I threw away everything in my apartment that reminded me of him. I'm trying to get rid of any of his influences so I can heal. But I'm so angry!!! I just want to punch him. And I'm so tired of crying!! I want to run out of tears so I can't cry anymore...
cdt76 Posted April 13, 2010 Posted April 13, 2010 Believe me, I know anger. I know anger so well, it almost consumed me. The crying will not stop anytime soon. I was told some advice recently that I too have been trying to do. "Embrace the wounds". This means that you should accept that you loved him and all the things he made you feel. YOUR feelings were true and sincere and so is your hurt. Know that you don't want him, but you want the idea of him. Clearing out old memories from your mind/house/computer is a good start. The memories will come and go and linger. Just be patient with yourself. Give yourself the time to accept your hurt and heal. It's hard to accept but you can do it if you want to. I'm still trying.
Author EyeAlone Posted April 15, 2010 Author Posted April 15, 2010 I just want to say that it hurts and angers me when one of my coworkers decides to share with me that she will be engaged soon. Pardon me for not leaping for joy! Sigh this will be a long 30 hour shift. . Hopefully I won't cry anymore in the library. I really hate my life right now.
Author EyeAlone Posted April 22, 2010 Author Posted April 22, 2010 This is so annoying. I check my email multiple times a day to see if he's emailed me. He was sending me breadcrumbs last week via email and the last I heard from him was Saturday. Although I was practicing NC, I'm still sad This is so hard!
dreamer0123 Posted April 23, 2010 Posted April 23, 2010 Summary of the day: I need a hug. **HUG** We all know how you are feeling... hang in there.. stay strong.. we are all here for you !!
Recommended Posts