TerryW Posted April 9, 2010 Posted April 9, 2010 Hey guys! I've been gone since January because I needed a break from all the pain. Update on us--Things are going so much better. We have instituded the Friday night @ 9 talk. We discuss our feelings and books (about the ordeal) The latest one is "How Can I Forgive You" (recommended) It makes me feel a whole lot better when he reads the books that I recommend. Like he's really trying to get it. Every now and then an twinge of pain will get me. We talk about it and I know it makes him feel terrible about what he did. He has really been doing the hard work required to make us "US" again. Having to look at himself and his actions has been very humbling for him. Every one in a while I think I'm being naive again to believe he's changed. He's doing everything right but that old fear comes back. Me--I doing great. Still looking good (read haven't regained any weight) In fact I altered a 2x sweater yesterday to fit my size 14 body. I also decided to go back to college to become a CPA. Online classes for the summer (kids) and then full time this fall. My question is "How or When did you know if everything was going to be okay?" Not to let my guard down completely but red alert is starting to drain me. What does it take to start believing in him again? I want to so badly but I'm afraid I'll be deceived again. Have a great day.
BlueeyedJonesy Posted April 9, 2010 Posted April 9, 2010 Terry, I am in the same boat as you right now..I feel like I'm on the right path..sometimes when things get "too good" the bad pessimistic side of me takes over..today is a bad day, I opened his email..which I haven't done in so long even tho he gave me the permission to do so whenever I feel its necessary. I feel like eventually it will go away but today my thoughts say otherwise. Things are amazing..yesterday was his bday and we had an amazing meal..compliments of yours truly..
broken12 Posted April 9, 2010 Posted April 9, 2010 Hi Terry. You're a fair bit further down the line than me - D day for me was only 1 month ago. It's so good to hear some more positive stories. I don't know if we'll EVER really believe in them again. My only hope at this stage is that I'll believe in him more next year than I do now, and more than that the year after. But no, I don't believe it will ever be total. Wishing you and blueeyedjonesy way more good days than bad.
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