Ilovecake Posted April 9, 2010 Posted April 9, 2010 Just wondering how important is it to you that your significant other share the same interests as you? Obviously you have to share some stuff but how much? Give you an example. I'm very much into hard rock music and going to rock shows I don't think I could date someone who isn't into that since it's such a big part of my social scene. My ex was also into the same music as me, as a matter of fact every guy I ever dated was/is. We planned out vacations around going to concerts and spend most of our free time listening to music. I would say he's even more fanatical about it than me. The girl he is marrying isn't into music at all. I still run into him at shows all the time but I only saw her with him once and she pretty much spent most of the night outside smoking cigarettes. I was just discussing this with my friend and wondering how they found a way around sharing such an important part of his life. Just curious how others feel about the subject?
Lakeside_runner Posted April 9, 2010 Posted April 9, 2010 I'm very active physically and I can't imagine dating somebody who's not. Ideal match? A runner or better yet - a triathlete! On the other end of the stick - if she'd enjoy art shows etc. we wouldn't be a good match...
yah Posted April 9, 2010 Posted April 9, 2010 (edited) As far as hobbies, its not that important that we have a lot in common. Sense of humor, similar goals and down-to-earth personality is what I look for. My SO share some similar music taste (i.e. rock) but I'm mostly very mainstream. Heck, I love Britney Spears and Lady GaGa. He takes me to all the indy rock bands around town. 90% of the time the music sucks but I always go for the atmosphere, drinks and to be with him so I still find it fun. I enjoy watching the performance over listening to the band screaming into the mic. With enough drinks, all the bands start to sound alike anyway... Also, I wanted to add that when SO and I first met, he hated theatre. Today he asked me to go with him again because it was so fun when I brought him to one last time. I think common interests can be gained. Edited April 9, 2010 by yah
Crazy Magnet Posted April 9, 2010 Posted April 9, 2010 I like to have some common interest so that we have things to bond over, but I mostly prefer diverse hobbies. That way I get to learn about new things and I get to teach someone about new things. In the process of a relationship that is balanced like that, I usually end up with 1 or 2 really fun new things I like to do in life.
Els Posted April 9, 2010 Posted April 9, 2010 He doesn't need to share ALL of them, but he'd definitely need to have some similar ones. Otherwise what are you gonna do during your time together? Sure, cuddling and sex and romantic dinners is good, but if that's all you do, wouldn't it be slightly sad?
cooldudeinberlin Posted April 9, 2010 Posted April 9, 2010 its good to have things like a similar sense of humor, some shared interest at how you approach things, common foundations in goals, directions, etc. But doesnt mean necessarily having same interest in hobbies... in fact, a stronger relationship is one that doesnt... people need their own time, their own space, their own friends.... much more healthy... However, to be open to new things (or new to you) and be able to appreciate the other's interest, even if not fully engaged in them, is also very key... support and encouragement are strong characteristics of a successful relationship.
Author Ilovecake Posted April 9, 2010 Author Posted April 9, 2010 All very awesome answers. Thanks guys. You’ve given me much perspective. My friends all tell me as far as dating goes I really need to step outside of the box I’ve chosen all my previous partners from.
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