Author maria_patheticsoul Posted April 8, 2010 Author Posted April 8, 2010 I'm from a SE Asian country as well, I understand, especially with the conversion rates. But according to http://www.theschengenoffice.com/belgium_tourist_visa.html , it doesn't require much paperwork at all, and only 150 pounds. While 150 pounds is a lot when converted to your currency, he lives and works in Belgium, so it's only really pocket change for him. What is so wrong about him paying for that, especially if he wants you to come too? The reason I'm not immediately advising you to breakup is that, yes, him buying an apartment at your place and furnishing it is a definite sign of commitment. However, his LD contact is truly horrible. He is really like that when he was here and we needed to separate for two months there are really times that he will not communicate with me for days....then when he is not angry anymore he will call me...
Els Posted April 8, 2010 Posted April 8, 2010 If you refuse to visit him because you can't afford it even though he wants to pay for you, that just screams 'I'm not that interested in you, I don't really want to see you that much'. I'm sorry, but I can't help but see it that way. My bf has paid for my tickets to see him a few times, and I'm pretty sure it didn't affect his level of respect for me.
Els Posted April 8, 2010 Posted April 8, 2010 He is really like that when he was here and we needed to separate for two months there are really times that he will not communicate with me for days....then when he is not angry anymore he will call me... But this is just so WRONG as well. Gosh, maria... :/
Rollercoasterr Posted April 8, 2010 Posted April 8, 2010 Maria, do you think he respects you now? Everything he does screams NO. If he respected you, he'd email you or call you. Does he? Not really. My fiance has paid for my tickets in the past and that hasn't made him respect me any less.
Author maria_patheticsoul Posted April 8, 2010 Author Posted April 8, 2010 We were comfortable with that way when he was here...i know he will contact me anyway and he always do....he visited me few times before he went here and stayed for 6months....during those first few times he will just stay for a month or two then he comes back...no problem with our communication then...even the first two months after he went back to his country still no problem...he calls every two weeks we email everyday....he started acting strange only last march 9....he spent a lot on me already and him paying my expenses to go with him i think is too much already but i told him someday anyway we have plans of getting married
Author maria_patheticsoul Posted April 8, 2010 Author Posted April 8, 2010 Maria, do you think he respects you now? Everything he does screams NO. If he respected you, he'd email you or call you. Does he? Not really. My fiance has paid for my tickets in the past and that hasn't made him respect me any less. I guess in a way i have my faults also...if he doesn't respect me now i think i did something that pushed him to his limit he always says i challenge him always.
Author maria_patheticsoul Posted April 8, 2010 Author Posted April 8, 2010 If you refuse to visit him because you can't afford it even though he wants to pay for you, that just screams 'I'm not that interested in you, I don't really want to see you that much'. I'm sorry, but I can't help but see it that way. My bf has paid for my tickets to see him a few times, and I'm pretty sure it didn't affect his level of respect for me. I know he will not think about it that way if i always refuse to visit him...he knows that i understood all his faults after saying sorry so he knows that refusing to visit him is not the only way for me to show how much i love him
Rollercoasterr Posted April 8, 2010 Posted April 8, 2010 I honestly feel for you. I really do. Good luck with everything.
Author maria_patheticsoul Posted April 8, 2010 Author Posted April 8, 2010 I honestly feel for you. I really do. Good luck with everything. Thank you..posting here as to what i am feeling is somehow a relief...i dont really have a close friend whom i can share this with
zebracolors Posted April 8, 2010 Posted April 8, 2010 yeah seems like your priorities are backwards there? If you asked him right out if he would still respect you if he payed for your visit trip, what do you think he would say? If he really loves you I bet the answer would be yes. So how does not visiting him show that you love him? Are you happy with him only visiting you in your country maybe only whenever he can? Or sparce communication?
Author maria_patheticsoul Posted April 8, 2010 Author Posted April 8, 2010 yeah seems like your priorities are backwards there? If you asked him right out if he would still respect you if he payed for your visit trip, what do you think he would say? If he really loves you I bet the answer would be yes. So how does not visiting him show that you love him? Are you happy with him only visiting you in your country maybe only whenever he can? Or sparce communication? Eversince we started this realtionship i never mentioned of visiting him but he asked me first time i said no..then he stopped but i think it annoys him whenever someone asks him when is he taking me with him and will tell them "she doesn't like".There was no problem with that really he doesn't nag me about it..i told him someday i will go with him for a vacation and i said yes to him when he said that if something happens to one of his parents we should go.He wanted to live here for the rest of his life he said and he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me.It was planned that when he come back this year he will stay for good and i am very happy for that...i asked him up front what will be the arrangement if he will come if he will stay for 6months only he said no he will stay for good.
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