Lakeside_runner Posted April 5, 2010 Posted April 5, 2010 I was out this weekend, hosting prospective graduate students for our department (math) and I don't know how but at some point dating become the topic of our conversation. Some people were very opinionated about the intellectual abilities of their potential partners and this went way beyond 'being able to keep up a conversation' or 'being passionate and somehow knowledgeable about something'... Several people said - they could not date anyone who does not understand calculus! I don't know... to me this is kind of weird but I've other expectations (which probably can be encountered more often in nature...). Anyways, my question is: what was the weirdest prerequisite you've encountered?
melodymatters Posted April 5, 2010 Posted April 5, 2010 Thats hilarious ! I suspect the longer the laundry lists get, the more lonely people we will encounter ! One of the happiest match ups I've seen have been my attorney friend, and her biker/carpenter boyfriend. She wasn't trying to prove anything to her peers and appreciated a strong, common sense man who could match HER emotionally, not her CV ! I'm currently not dating after being widowed and having a few other things on my plate that I'd like to do first, but my dating age range ? 28-58. Education - Who cares if you can support yourself and we can have interesting conversations Looks- we have to appreciate each others obviously, but no " Must be 5'10" or above. My silliest rejection was a guy from online dating. I wrote him and sent some pics, he wrote back, LOVED the pics,and we had some pleasant e-mails, but had not yet progressed to the phone or making plans ( this was a LONG time ago) Suddenly, after being told how beautiful my pics were and stimulating my letters were, he "realized" I was too short ! I was, and have been 5'2. it was right there on my profile, but apparently he missed that and wrote back that he could only see himself with someone between 5'7 - 5'10 ! Good luck to those with such stringent criteria !
aerogurl87 Posted April 5, 2010 Posted April 5, 2010 I think the weirdest preresiquite I've known was my ex boyfriend's preresiquite of must love to play Second Life (it's an online game) because apparently that's a deal breaker to him, lol. My list is pretty short. Guy must be able to hold a decent conversation, have at least one thing he's passionate about (even if I don't fully understand it), be able to support himself or working towards being able to like myself, not bad to look at, loyal, my height or taller, and a romantic like myself. If a guy has those qualities then we are good to go.
threebyfate Posted April 5, 2010 Posted April 5, 2010 *hides laundry list created prior to meeting H.*
BobSacamento Posted April 5, 2010 Posted April 5, 2010 Not knowing calc LOL. That is severly limiting your dating pool. That I feel is just a defense mechanisim in terms of rejection. They want to use that to make them feel superior in case of rejection. I will say this - if I find out the person I'm dating is attending tea part rallies, that's a deal breaker.
Stockalone Posted April 5, 2010 Posted April 5, 2010 I don't know... to me this is kind of weird but I've other expectations (which probably can be encountered more often in nature...). Anyways, my question is: what was the weirdest prerequisite you've encountered? Thats hilarious ! I suspect the longer the laundry lists get, the more lonely people we will encounter ! I agree with you. The pickier you are, the smaller your dating pool gets. However, even a short list of requirements can rule out plenty of people. My laundry list certainly rules out plenty of women. *hides laundry list created prior to meeting H.* As if your h. didn't meet the important requirements.
Disillusioned Posted April 5, 2010 Posted April 5, 2010 Believe it or not, even I once had a gf! She and I broke up because I didn't share her appreciation of loud music, smoking pot, and driving under the influence. So, maybe you could say her prerequisite was love of hedonism. My prerequisite... hmm, I won't date any woman who's always getting into trouble with the law.
threebyfate Posted April 6, 2010 Posted April 6, 2010 As if your h. didn't meet the important requirements.He's exceeded all the important ones!
ADF Posted April 6, 2010 Posted April 6, 2010 The weirdest prerequisite I ever heard was a woman who said a man could never, ever wear white socks. A man who wore white socks was an utterly clueless dolt, in her view. I don't still don't get that one.
Author Lakeside_runner Posted April 6, 2010 Author Posted April 6, 2010 Not knowing calc LOL. That is severly limiting your dating pool. That I feel is just a defense mechanisim in terms of rejection. They want to use that to make them feel superior in case of rejection. There is some truth to that... + when I was listening to that the only word I could think of is 'inbreeding'
USMCHokie Posted April 6, 2010 Posted April 6, 2010 Only one prerequisite for me: Must be willing to date an Asian.
Engadget Posted April 6, 2010 Posted April 6, 2010 I don't really have any looks wise, but personality. She needs to be on my level intellectually, or else it doesn't work. I can't stand the hot-but-dumb-as-bricks girls, they just upset me. Or girls that only like music "they can dance to". Ughhh.
USMCHokie Posted April 6, 2010 Posted April 6, 2010 Do you think there's a difference between "willingness" and "desire"? Yes, absolutely. I'll take willingness...because I don't think desire actually exists for that particular characteristic...
Peter Attis Posted April 6, 2010 Posted April 6, 2010 One girl told me that in order to be with her, I must eat her ***hole. Luckily, I was more than willing to do that anyway, so we worked out just fine!
Citizen Erased Posted April 6, 2010 Posted April 6, 2010 One girl told me that in order to be with her, I must eat her ***hole. Luckily, I was more than willing to do that anyway, so we worked out just fine! Well that's this thread done! He must be rich. So good looking my friends all hate me. I love mummy's boys, aren't they divine! Must be prepared to give me one kid that I can proceeed to ignore in order to focus on yoga and drinking.
123BeachFan Posted April 6, 2010 Posted April 6, 2010 I know a guy who won't date a woman who has children younger than his. His reasoning is that when he's done raising his, he's done with children. I countered his logic, asking how he'd feel if a woman dumped him because HIS children were younger than hers. He looked dumfounded and said that women don't think that way. Hmmm. I know a gal who's holding out for a cowboy with a German accent. She's still single.
RobM Posted April 6, 2010 Posted April 6, 2010 I don't have any since I've been married forever and am not allowed to date, but I remember when we were shopping for a new house, the mrs had a long list of exactly what she wanted, then we'd walk into a house that had none of them and she'd look around and say "I love this one, let's buy it". So, my opinion is that our lists are only used to justify rejecting someone we just don't want because, um, we just don't want them. If it's someone that sparks those certain feelings in us, well, the list be damned.
Author Lakeside_runner Posted April 6, 2010 Author Posted April 6, 2010 So, my opinion is that our lists are only used to justify rejecting someone we just don't want because, um, we just don't want them. If it's someone that sparks those certain feelings in us, well, the list be damned. That's actually very interesting... I bet these guys whom I talked to over the weekend (being really overweight nerds) face a lot of rejection so your point of view would be well justified here.
Leia Posted April 6, 2010 Posted April 6, 2010 Well that's this thread done! He must be rich. So good looking my friends all hate me. I love mummy's boys, aren't they divine! Must be prepared to give me one kid that I can proceeed to ignore in order to focus on yoga and drinking. :lmao:
Stockalone Posted April 6, 2010 Posted April 6, 2010 That's actually very interesting... I bet these guys whom I talked to over the weekend (being really overweight nerds) face a lot of rejection so your point of view would be well justified here. It's certainly possible in some cases, but generally I would think that most people actually have a reason for having certain requirements on their laundry list. I never changed my mind about my deal breakers. They exist for a reason.
Stung Posted April 6, 2010 Posted April 6, 2010 Suddenly, after being told how beautiful my pics were and stimulating my letters were, he "realized" I was too short ! I was, and have been 5'2. it was right there on my profile, but apparently he missed that and wrote back that he could only see himself with someone between 5'7 - 5'10 ! Good luck to those with such stringent criteria ! Ha ha, I used to frequently hear that I was too tall. Sometimes I'd be sitting down and some man would be hitting on me, we'd be getting along pretty well when I would have to stand for some reason or other and his face would visibly fall when he realized I was taller than him. I am six feet and it seemed like my height was often an issue, with shorter males either made hopelessly insecure by it (I am crouching in my Jr. year prom pictures ) or responding to it like a challenge, making it pretty clear in the process that the main thing they liked me for was my height . A couple years after I met him I found out that my (two inches taller than myself) husband has some kind of personal theory about all short women being crazy, though, which is the first time I'd ever heard the reverse situation. My husband has a 40-year-old friend who refuses to date a woman who wouldn't let him play WoW at least 40 hours a week. Not terribly surprisingly this guy has been single the entire time I've known him.
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