Is she using my Dad for his money?

[LuckyCharm]

My step mom has always been kind of a weird person but only yesterday when DH and I were talking about her we started connection the pieces to the puzzle, just some weird things she's done over the past 2 years of knowing her.

 

Just some back around on my Dad; he and my mom divorced and she tried to take all his money, he almost lost his house and every 2 years she would take him back to court to get more child support money out of him.

My Dad has told me he never wants to marry again cause he's afraid the same thing will happen again.

My Dad owns is own house, has property in another state and has half a million in the bank. (and my step mom knows that).

 

The only reason DH and I figured this out was because she's not very nice to my DH anymore, and she's started saying some things to me that just don't feel right.

 

Let's call my step mom Viki.

My Dad and Viki aren't married yet but plan to. They have already been a couple before but broke up once, then they didn't speak to each other for a year.

 

Then I came back into my Dad's life and Viki started talking to him again and started getting close to his mom.

 

Before my DH and I arrived to the States to go live with my Dad my Grandma couldn't take care of her self so she came to live with my Dad and Viki always came around his house to visit his mom and my Dad just couldn't care for her.

He could care for her cause he said she thinks only about her self.

 

So Viki was trying to change herself by getting closer to me and DH buying us gifts and such and then around Christmas of 08 they got back together.

 

I'll give you guys a list of why I think she might be marrying him for his money but first I need to mention the fact that my Dad wanted to sell DH and I his house for really cheap so we can make a profit out of it.

also around March my Dad was mad at me to he left a printed paper on the table for me to "find" how much he's leaving me and my brother in his will.

 

Now he's are some things that just look strange and why I think Viki might have other intentions marrying him over than love, we think she's doing it in a slow and smart way to get control over my Dad:

 

* Didn't talk for a year to my Dad till he got back in contact with me.

 

* Always came around his house to visit his Mom.

 

*Tried getting really close to me by buying me pregnancy clothes.

 

*Pretty much just announced she'll be with me in the delivery room without asking.

 

*Always came around after my Daughter Alex was born.

 

* Dad stopped sharing things with DH and I once they got back together.

 

* Around the end of march she was thinking about moving in with my Dad in the next month or 2, and around that time he asked us to leave his house.

 

*in Jan. Dad told me that Barbie is in big debt (about $200,000 - $400,000!) and that he made sure that if anything happens to him all his money goes to her and i get the house. (which was all the money that would go to my Brother and I he suddenly gave it all to her.

 

* They now seem in a hurry to sell the house and I told my Dad that I want to buy his house when I have enough money he said "Well, if it's still there."

 

* Dad doesn't use his computer and talked a while back about getting rid of it, so DH last week asked if he can buy his computer and he said "I'll have to talk to Barbie about it." (she has her own laptop).

 

* When we went to Dad's house again he didn't mention anything about the computer, and DH saw the Barbie put one of her computer game next to my Dad's computer as if marking her territory (I've always seen her playing computer games on her laptop).

 

About the computer, it's my Dad's, he bought it with his money and she has her laptop and maybe uses the computer once a month, so why does he have to ask her? it kind of feels as if she has alot of control over his actions.

 

About his will, I don't care about his money. I turned down my Grandma when she asked me if I wanted her house cause I'm not greedy and I know other family members need it more than i do. I'd rather see his money go to both of my Aunts who really do need the money.

 

Viki is a BIG $$ spender and she knows a women her age isn't gonna get out of that kind of debt for years.

So basically DH and i think she might be trying to pressure my Dad into marriage cause even though he left her all his money I could still take her to court if something happens to my Dad so she won't get his money.

And I think Viki wanted him to sell the house now more than ever so I won't get his house so my Dad will make a good profit selling the house. meaning more money in the bank for her.

 

So if you put it together you got this:

They sell the current house

They build a house on my Dad's property

If something happens to my Dad she gets all his money.

And if they do get married she will legally get his new house.

 

or she might after some times of marriage divorce my Dad and take all his money just like my mom did to him and at this point of his life he can't start all over again and my Dad will just be too heart broken to recover.

 

I'm really afraid for my Dad I hope I'm wrong but there's just too much Viki does that just doesn't seem in place.

 

I know I can't tell this to my Dad, cause everything I tell him he tells her and if I'm wrong it will cause alot of heart ache and problems in the family.

 

Do you guys think I might be right or am I just being paranoid?

Edited April 5, 2010 by LuckyCharm

[aerogurl87]

Well I ain't saying she's a gold digger, but.... the evidence speaks for itself.

[rhod123]

Yes.. Definitely. She is plucking the money from your father tree. so you should put your words carefully in-front of your father because he has fallen madly with her.

[LuckyCharm]

Thanks guys for the reply!

Since then My DH and I have tried to ignore the signs about Vikki just in case we are wrong but on May 8th we visited and Vikki kept on showing my Daughter Alex all kinds of crap on youtube and DH went to take Alex and did it kind of rude but then realized he mad a mistake so he went to Vikki and explained that he just doesn't want Alex watching too much tv. Vikki acted like she understood but then a few days latter my Dad came over to our house and lectured DH out side telling him how hurtful he was to Vikki and that Vikki was crying all evening in the bathroom (big lie! Vikki was on the computer all the time with the door open) and that if he can't apologize to Vikki he's no longer welcome to be in his house.

 

DH called Vikki up right away and tried to apologize but Vikki answered rudely saying "I can't talk right now I'm busy shopping." o_0

 

DH tried calling my Dad up and leaving a message asking my Dad to give him a call back when he can but so far he hasn't called back and Vikki didn't call back to say anything like maybe she's accepted DH's apology...

 

The Drama Vikki is creating is so hurtful I have decided We're not doing to visit my Dad anymore, he can come here if he wants to see us.

[carhill]

Pre-nup

 

My best friend took care of a similar type situation with a carefully planned and executed trust with his lawyer and yours truly as co-trustees. Everyone wins.

 

If ever there was a poster child for estate planning, this is it. Make that appointment with a lawyer today.

 

 

Edited to add, yes, no doubt, she's a Hoover... deluxe model:)

[Eeyore79]

My Dad and Viki aren't married yet but plan to. They have already been a couple before but broke up once, then they didn't speak to each other for a year.

I don't see a problem with this. They got together, they broke up for a year, then they got back together. So what?

 

Then I came back into my Dad's life and Viki started talking to him again and started getting close to his mom.

So you think she only came back into his life because you were around? What possible difference could it make to her if you were around or not? And call me crazy, but if I love someone I'm friendly towards his mother!

 

Before my DH and I arrived to the States to go live with my Dad my Grandma couldn't take care of her self so she came to live with my Dad and Viki always came around his house to visit his mom and my Dad just couldn't care for her.

Erm... so this woman came to visit her boyfriend's elderly mother... I still fail to see anything wrong with this.

 

So Viki was trying to change herself by getting closer to me and DH buying us gifts and such and then around Christmas of 08 they got back together.

OMG, you mean she was actually being nice to the daughter of the man she was interested in? Call the cops!

 

* Didn't talk for a year to my Dad till he got back in contact with me.

 

* Always came around his house to visit his Mom.

 

*Tried getting really close to me by buying me pregnancy clothes.

 

*Pretty much just announced she'll be with me in the delivery room without asking.

 

*Always came around after my Daughter Alex was born.

Sorry, but these all sound like normal things for someone to do. She got back together with her ex, was friendly towards his mother and kind to his daughter... I don't really see what the problem is?

 

* Dad stopped sharing things with DH and I once they got back together.

So previously he confided in you, but then he found a partner and started sharing things with her instead. Um.. still failing to see the problem here, sorry... I would expect a man to confide in his partner instead of his daughter.

 

* Around the end of march she was thinking about moving in with my Dad in the next month or 2, and around that time he asked us to leave his house.

It seems perfectly reasonable that your Dad would want you to get out there and stand on your own two feet, so he can move his girlfriend in and get on with his own life.

 

*in Jan. Dad told me that Barbie is in big debt (about $200,000 - $400,000!) and that he made sure that if anything happens to him all his money goes to her and i get the house. (which was all the money that would go to my Brother and I he suddenly gave it all to her.

Ahh, so this is the crux of the matter, isn't it? Previously your Dad was going to sell you his house cheap, so you could make a profit on it, but now he has his own ideas about what he wants to do with his house and his money, and you don't like it.

 

* They now seem in a hurry to sell the house and I told my Dad that I want to buy his house when I have enough money he said "Well, if it's still there."

Sorry, but it's his house and he can sell it if he wants to. Maybe he wants the money for something else... he wants to spend it on enjoying life with his partner instead of giving it all to you.

 

* Dad doesn't use his computer and talked a while back about getting rid of it, so DH last week asked if he can buy his computer and he said "I'll have to talk to Barbie about it." (she has her own laptop).

He could have any number of reasons for wanting to consult her. Maybe she uses the computer sometimes. It's perfectly normal for couples to discuss financial issues and have a discussion before selling something.

 

* When we went to Dad's house again he didn't mention anything about the computer, and DH saw the Barbie put one of her computer game next to my Dad's computer as if marking her territory (I've always seen her playing computer games on her laptop).

Oh come on, really? She put her computer game next to the computer? So what?

 

About the computer, it's my Dad's, he bought it with his money and she has her laptop and maybe uses the computer once a month, so why does he have to ask her? it kind of feels as if she has alot of control over his actions.

Couples discuss things. They are a couple. If she uses the computer, it seems perfectly reasonable to talk to her about selling it.

 

So if you put it together you got this:

They sell the current house

They build a house on my Dad's property

If something happens to my Dad she gets all his money.

And if they do get married she will legally get his new house.

Do you really think your Dad would leave every penny to her? He could easily leave some of it to you if he wanted to. If he doesn't leave it to you, I guess he doesn't want you to have it.

 

or she might after some times of marriage divorce my Dad and take all his money just like my mom did to him and at this point of his life he can't start all over again and my Dad will just be too heart broken to recover.

He's a big boy, if he wants to marry her it's up to him. There's always a risk of divorce, and it's his decision if he wants to take that risk.

 

Sorry, but this just sounds like sour grapes because your Dad has taken charge of his own life and isn't leaving every penny to you any more. He's met a woman and wants her to be his wife, and he wants to make sure she's provided for after he's gone. You thought he was going to hand over his house to you on the cheap, and leave everything to you when he dies, so you're obviously displeased at this turn of events. But your Dad is an adult, and if he wants to marry a woman and provide for her, and take care of her after his death, then it's his right to do so. Maybe she is a gold digger, and maybe not... but that's his problem and you can't interfere with his relationship. You may not like it, but unless you want to create problems it might be best just to say nothing. I actually feel kind of sorry for the woman... she tried her best to be kind to you, gave you gifts, helped you with your new baby, was kind to your grandma, and now you're accusing her of being a gold digger just because your Dad prefers to spend his money on her than on you.

[LucreziaBorgia]

You will definitely want to go see a lawyer. She not only attempting to cut you out financially, but emotionally as well.

[alphamale]

Do you guys think I might be right or am I just being paranoid?

no, she's a gold digger

[pureinheart]

Hi LC,

 

Whether your right or wrong, your dad might resent you if you interfere...also a house and 500k isn't really that much money...IMO not enough to marry/use a person for...if she were seasoned con artist she would go for much more...sure it "sounds" like a lot of money, but in the big picture, no.

 

I'd say to let it go if you can as your dad will do what he wants anyway...I really hope everything works out...

[pureinheart]

I don't see a problem with this. They got together, they broke up for a year, then they got back together. So what?

 

 

So you think she only came back into his life because you were around? What possible difference could it make to her if you were around or not? And call me crazy, but if I love someone I'm friendly towards his mother!

 

 

Erm... so this woman came to visit her boyfriend's elderly mother... I still fail to see anything wrong with this.

 

 

OMG, you mean she was actually being nice to the daughter of the man she was interested in? Call the cops!

 

 

Sorry, but these all sound like normal things for someone to do. She got back together with her ex, was friendly towards his mother and kind to his daughter... I don't really see what the problem is?

 

 

So previously he confided in you, but then he found a partner and started sharing things with her instead. Um.. still failing to see the problem here, sorry... I would expect a man to confide in his partner instead of his daughter.

 

 

It seems perfectly reasonable that your Dad would want you to get out there and stand on your own two feet, so he can move his girlfriend in and get on with his own life.

 

 

Ahh, so this is the crux of the matter, isn't it? Previously your Dad was going to sell you his house cheap, so you could make a profit on it, but now he has his own ideas about what he wants to do with his house and his money, and you don't like it.

 

 

Sorry, but it's his house and he can sell it if he wants to. Maybe he wants the money for something else... he wants to spend it on enjoying life with his partner instead of giving it all to you.

 

 

He could have any number of reasons for wanting to consult her. Maybe she uses the computer sometimes. It's perfectly normal for couples to discuss financial issues and have a discussion before selling something.

 

 

Oh come on, really? She put her computer game next to the computer? So what?

 

 

Couples discuss things. They are a couple. If she uses the computer, it seems perfectly reasonable to talk to her about selling it.

 

 

Do you really think your Dad would leave every penny to her? He could easily leave some of it to you if he wanted to. If he doesn't leave it to you, I guess he doesn't want you to have it.

 

 

He's a big boy, if he wants to marry her it's up to him. There's always a risk of divorce, and it's his decision if he wants to take that risk.

 

Sorry, but this just sounds like sour grapes because your Dad has taken charge of his own life and isn't leaving every penny to you any more. He's met a woman and wants her to be his wife, and he wants to make sure she's provided for after he's gone. You thought he was going to hand over his house to you on the cheap, and leave everything to you when he dies, so you're obviously displeased at this turn of events. But your Dad is an adult, and if he wants to marry a woman and provide for her, and take care of her after his death, then it's his right to do so. Maybe she is a gold digger, and maybe not... but that's his problem and you can't interfere with his relationship. You may not like it, but unless you want to create problems it might be best just to say nothing. I actually feel kind of sorry for the woman... she tried her best to be kind to you, gave you gifts, helped you with your new baby, was kind to your grandma, and now you're accusing her of being a gold digger just because your Dad prefers to spend his money on her than on you.

 

I totally agree...I stayed out of my parents business...they both re-married...it was theirs to do with as they pleased.

 

This is the problem I had with the last R I was in...(not saying this about you LC) his kids were too nosey and up in his businesss, and he in theirs.

[LuckyCharm]

I don't see a problem with this. They got together, they broke up for a year, then they got back together. So what?

 

 

So you think she only came back into his life because you were around? What possible difference could it make to her if you were around or not? And call me crazy, but if I love someone I'm friendly towards his mother!

 

 

Erm... so this woman came to visit her boyfriend's elderly mother... I still fail to see anything wrong with this.

 

 

OMG, you mean she was actually being nice to the daughter of the man she was interested in? Call the cops!

 

 

Sorry, but these all sound like normal things for someone to do. She got back together with her ex, was friendly towards his mother and kind to his daughter... I don't really see what the problem is?

 

 

So previously he confided in you, but then he found a partner and started sharing things with her instead. Um.. still failing to see the problem here, sorry... I would expect a man to confide in his partner instead of his daughter.

 

 

It seems perfectly reasonable that your Dad would want you to get out there and stand on your own two feet, so he can move his girlfriend in and get on with his own life.

 

 

Ahh, so this is the crux of the matter, isn't it? Previously your Dad was going to sell you his house cheap, so you could make a profit on it, but now he has his own ideas about what he wants to do with his house and his money, and you don't like it.

 

 

Sorry, but it's his house and he can sell it if he wants to. Maybe he wants the money for something else... he wants to spend it on enjoying life with his partner instead of giving it all to you.

 

 

He could have any number of reasons for wanting to consult her. Maybe she uses the computer sometimes. It's perfectly normal for couples to discuss financial issues and have a discussion before selling something.

 

 

Oh come on, really? She put her computer game next to the computer? So what?

 

 

Couples discuss things. They are a couple. If she uses the computer, it seems perfectly reasonable to talk to her about selling it.

 

 

Do you really think your Dad would leave every penny to her? He could easily leave some of it to you if he wanted to. If he doesn't leave it to you, I guess he doesn't want you to have it.

 

 

He's a big boy, if he wants to marry her it's up to him. There's always a risk of divorce, and it's his decision if he wants to take that risk.

 

Sorry, but this just sounds like sour grapes because your Dad has taken charge of his own life and isn't leaving every penny to you any more. He's met a woman and wants her to be his wife, and he wants to make sure she's provided for after he's gone. You thought he was going to hand over his house to you on the cheap, and leave everything to you when he dies, so you're obviously displeased at this turn of events. But your Dad is an adult, and if he wants to marry a woman and provide for her, and take care of her after his death, then it's his right to do so. Maybe she is a gold digger, and maybe not... but that's his problem and you can't interfere with his relationship. You may not like it, but unless you want to create problems it might be best just to say nothing. I actually feel kind of sorry for the woman... she tried her best to be kind to you, gave you gifts, helped you with your new baby, was kind to your grandma, and now you're accusing her of being a gold digger just because your Dad prefers to spend his money on her than on you.

 

Eeyore, I understand that we all have our own opinions and we all see things differently.

If you read carefully you would see I don't care about getting my Dad's money and rather see it going to people like my Aunt who has no money to put her kids through college. it's about the drastic changes happening. I have never asked my Dad for money, not even a $1, I was cut out of his life for 18 years and all I wanted was my Dad back.

 

If she's really a truly good person and really loves my Dad and wants to be a part of our family then why is she treating my DH and I meanly?

 

Vikki went to visit my grandma when they already broke up and my Dad couldn't stand her being around cause all she could do was talk about herself and care about her self and that's why she drastically changed and you can only put on an act for so long.

 

Pureinheart, Thank you for your reply. it is my Dad's life and like you said I'm not interfering at all. your right about 500k not really being that much but that would be what she needs to cover her debt (my dad told me this). I have never been rude to Vikki and always respected them but now we come to a different situation if you saw my update today on how she made a big deal out of something so small and trust me she made it seem so bad my Dad won't even call us and listen to what we have to say.

Vikki knows how much my Dad missed me all these years my mom took me away from him and now it feels like she's just like my mom instead of growing up and saying to my Dad something like "Hey, you know what; let's be mature here it's not worth staying mad, why don't you give your daughter the one you haven't seen for 18 year a call...." but I doubt she'll say that cause it seems like she loves what she's created.

[Jilly Bean]

I don't see one shred of evidence of how she is gold-digging him.

 

Because she put a computer game on his larger computer? Because she's nice to his Mom?

 

Girl, either you love to start drama where none exists, or you have too much time on your hands.

 

Be happy that your Dad has a good woman in his life, and butt out of his affairs. He doesn't need you micromanaging his love life.

 

Overall, I think the real thrust of this is that you're jealous of their relationship, since you are coming late to the party in your Dads life. I get that - its natural for kids to want attention from a parent, even when they are older and probably more so for you since you were deprived of him growing up.

[LuckyCharm]

I don't see one shred of evidence of how she is gold-digging him.

 

Because she put a computer game on his larger computer? Because she's nice to his Mom?

 

Girl, either you love to start drama where none exists, or you have too much time on your hands.

 

Be happy that your Dad has a good woman in his life, and butt out of his affairs. He doesn't need you micromanaging his love life.

 

Overall, I think the real thrust of this is that you're jealous of their relationship, since you are coming late to the party in your Dads life. I get that - its natural for kids to want attention from a parent, even when they are older and probably more so for you since you were deprived of him growing up.

 

I don't love drama and that's why I'm not going over to their house anymore so I won't give Vikki a reason to stir things up.

Have you read my updates at all? I know my First post was only suspicions and I tried just to forget about it in case I was wrong but I don't think so.

If my DH and I really liked drama then DH would not have called Vikki up right away to apologize. For a whole year and a half Vikki had us fooled and there were times she was VERY rude to DH and I but we didn't stir up any drama we just forgave her cause that's what families do.

[Jilly Bean]

Yes, and I really don't see any evidence of how she's setting up your Dad. Sorry...

 

My parents are still married, so I can't fully appreciate your position, but I know if my folks were divorced, and one got involved with someone new, I'd be hyper-suspicious as well. But, please realize it's probably just your paranoia rather than anything genuinely founded.

[LuckyCharm]

Yes, and I really don't see any evidence of how she's setting up your Dad. Sorry...

 

My parents are still married, so I can't fully appreciate your position, but I know if my folks were divorced, and one got involved with someone new, I'd be hyper-suspicious as well. But, please realize it's probably just your paranoia rather than anything genuinely founded.

 

I have thought it was just me being paranoid cause at first I really liked Vikki and hopped that they would have gotten back together. but now with this new situation it's likely she is, my Dad isn't calling and that's not like him at all.

 

Remember that Vikki might be working VERY carefully but getting close to all the family but she has done her home work and knows just what my mom did to my Dad.

 

I don't want to lose my relationship with my Dad, I sent him a text message and he still hasn't called so I will be calling him tomorrow and leaving a message if he doesn't answer.

 

and just if I'm wrong here, lets say I am, then why is Vikki being so rude to my DH and I always talking as if she's better than us and making my DH sound like such a bad person that my Dad would tell him he can't come over any more if he keeps on being rude to Vikki?

Maybe all the above I can ignore but what she's doing now is just really hurtful.

[Jilly Bean]

Probably because she knows you guys don't like her, and are trying to drive a wedge in her relationship with your Dad.

 

She is trying to have a R with your Dad, and knows you don't want it to progress. So, of course she is going to alienate you.

 

Ultimately, your Dad will choose her, if this passive/aggressive battle for his attention continues.

 

I know whenever I am on the outs with my Mom, and try to talk smack about her to my Dad, he won't have it, and rather than support me, even when I'm right - lol, he ALWAYS takes her side.

 

It's just the way relationships work, and honestly, how they should work. She should be your Dad's primary focus and relationship, as he is marrying her, and building a life with her. You are a grown, married woman, with a life of her own.

 

Back off a bit, and I'm sure you'll see them, and their marriage, in a new light.

[LuckyCharm]

Probably because she knows you guys don't like her, and are trying to drive a wedge in her relationship with your Dad.

 

She is trying to have a R with your Dad, and knows you don't want it to progress. So, of course she is going to alienate you.

 

Ultimately, your Dad will choose her, if this passive/aggressive battle for his attention continues.

 

I know whenever I am on the outs with my Mom, and try to talk smack about her to my Dad, he won't have it, and rather than support me, even when I'm right - lol, he ALWAYS takes her side.

 

It's just the way relationships work, and honestly, how they should work. She should be your Dad's primary focus and relationship, as he is marrying her, and building a life with her. You are a grown, married woman, with a life of her own.

 

Back off a bit, and I'm sure you'll see them, and their marriage, in a new light.

 

Jilly Bean, that's what I'm trying to tell you, I have never butted into his life or said anything wrong about Vikki to him, if anything all this time I have been nothing but nice to her.

She might suspect DH isn't much of a fan of her after what happened but she has been rude and mean to us for a long time now and I have always overlooked her rudeness.

 

it just doesn't seem to matter what I say any more but I do understand what your saying and trying to give me another point of view but there are alot of other things she's done I'm just not mentioning here cause I don't want this to be too long for every one to read.

[turnera]

I promise you, she knows EXACTLY how you feel about her. So does your dad. And he chooses HER. My dad married the Evil Witch of the West, and she literally ruined our lives, but he STILL chose her. We cut them out of our lives, just like you, and I hate myself every day for being that petty and lowering myself to her level. My daughter lost out on her only grandpa because I wanted to make a big deal out of it.

 

On his deathbed, he said that he knew we hated her, but he needed her. She took care of him, and that was all he wanted in life (and why he left my mom; she wouldn't quit her job to be his mommy).

 

It would be easier to believe you if you didn't keep bringing up the money. If you care nothing about the money or the house, then there's really nothing to make an issue out of, is there?

 

So just go back and accept her and let your kid(s) have their grandpa in their lives. Don't make the mistake I did.

[LuckyCharm]

I promise you, she knows EXACTLY how you feel about her. So does your dad. And he chooses HER. My dad married the Evil Witch of the West, and she literally ruined our lives, but he STILL chose her. We cut them out of our lives, just like you, and I hate myself every day for being that petty and lowering myself to her level. My daughter lost out on her only grandpa because I wanted to make a big deal out of it.

 

On his deathbed, he said that he knew we hated her, but he needed her. She took care of him, and that was all he wanted in life (and why he left my mom; she wouldn't quit her job to be his mommy).

 

It would be easier to believe you if you didn't keep bringing up the money. If you care nothing about the money or the house, then there's really nothing to make an issue out of, is there?

 

So just go back and accept her and let your kid(s) have their grandpa in their lives. Don't make the mistake I did.

 

I'm not gonna cut off contact completely, my mom took me away from my dad and I would never do that to him again, that would just be pure evil. all I said was I don't wanna go over to his house any more but he can come over to visit us.

plus DH and I have been the ones calling my Dad, he's the one who hasn't been returning our calls.

 

I'm sure your right about Vikki know we don't like her. but this is very recently cause i would always call her up ask her how she is, this behavior of hers started long before I ever suspected her, it pretty much started right after she got back with my dad.

 

The reason I bring up the money is because everyone else makes me feel like I'm some scum bag that only really cares about money, truth is my mom is a sick in the head money lover and I'd never be any thing like her. now I'm sure can understand since you dad married again, not sure the reason you didn't like his wife but when one marriage fails and you get into a nother you just want to make sure it's really true love.

[turnera]

My Evil SM didn't like my DH for standing up to her, so she had a bunch of church ladies sign a letter she wrote to CPS saying he abused our daughter. CPS threw it out, but I knew she did it, and the CPS lady told us to sue her; we didn't, to keep peace in the family. But the rumor mill started; we eventually had to move out of our dream house, I lost my dream job, because by the time we moved the rumor had become that DH was a child molester and on the prowl; daughter got kicked out of organizations because no one would let their child associate with her; daughter lost all but one friend; a neighbor made it her job to warn everyone in the neighborhood about my DH, even though I told her the truth to her face; even teachers were telling her one friend's mother to not let her friend play with our daughter(!) and the school wouldn't do anything about it. And my dysfunctional family told me that I should apologize to HER for being mad at her! While she denied the whole thing the whole time - until my dad's death.

 

Oh, and every year (before this all happened), Evil SM would read her and my dad's will to the family so we'd know who was getting what. She started with me, my brother, my DH, and her; then she added her son (fine with me); then his wife; then his kid; then her long-lost illegitimate daughter; her husband; her kid; that daughter's new husband (after SM ran the first one off); son's new wife; HER son. And she took my DH out, because, in her words 'he has a great job and he doesn't need anything.'

 

In the end, I got my grandpa's watch.

 

So, I'm here to tell you, just back away and let it happen.

[LuckyCharm]

My Evil SM didn't like my DH for standing up to her, so she had a bunch of church ladies sign a letter she wrote to CPS saying he abused our daughter. CPS threw it out, but I knew she did it, and the CPS lady told us to sue her; we didn't, to keep peace in the family. But the rumor mill started; we eventually had to move out of our dream house, I lost my dream job, because by the time we moved the rumor had become that DH was a child molester and on the prowl; daughter got kicked out of organizations because no one would let their child associate with her; daughter lost all but one friend; a neighbor made it her job to warn everyone in the neighborhood about my DH, even though I told her the truth to her face; even teachers were telling her one friend's mother to not let her friend play with our daughter(!) and the school wouldn't do anything about it. And my dysfunctional family told me that I should apologize to HER for being mad at her! While she denied the whole thing the whole time - until my dad's death.

 

Oh, and every year (before this all happened), Evil SM would read her and my dad's will to the family so we'd know who was getting what. She started with me, my brother, my DH, and her; then she added her son (fine with me); then his wife; then his kid; then her long-lost illegitimate daughter; her husband; her kid; that daughter's new husband (after SM ran the first one off); son's new wife; HER son. And she took my DH out, because, in her words 'he has a great job and he doesn't need anything.'

 

In the end, I got my grandpa's watch.

 

So, I'm here to tell you, just back away and let it happen.

 

WOW what a horrible SM you had! so sorry you had to go through all that. did she admit after your fathers death that she lied?

 

Trust me I'm backing away, that's why I said I no longer want to go to their house, I don't want to give her another reason to stir up more drama just because I breathed or walked the wrong way...kwim?

If my Dad wants to see us he can come over and spend as much time as he wants with my daughter.

 

I haven't mentioned this before but my Dad has started asking me all kinds of questions about my mom (he told me before many times that he has forgiven her and just wants a quiet life) and said Vikki has been bringing up to him all these question. I won't say what questions she has been asking but they sound as if she's trying to stir up trouble from the past. thats why next time if my Dad asks me something about my mom I'm just gonna tell him to leave the past behind and not worry about what the heck my mom does with her life.