How do you know when it's time to end things?

[airuhkuh]

For the past month or so, my relationship has been really rocky, and mostly it's my fault. I need to talk to my boyfriend soon because we're right now we are not really together nor have we broken up.

 

My question is, how do you know when it's time to end it? When we talk about things, I get so upset and I cry. I know part of that is guilt at how I've been treating him lately and the crush I developed on a guy while on vacation. I really want to try dating other people, but he isn't going to allow that. If we break up, I won't see him again. I'm going to miss him terribly though. He's my best friend and the person I can always trust to talk to (except lately I haven't).

 

But at the same time, I almost wanted to meet someone else when I went on vacation. I want the excitement of dating someone new, but I don't know if that's just because we're going through a slump and I'm bored with this relationship. Sometimes I feel like he cares for me far more than I care for him. I can't figure it out!

[ADF]

In your case, the time to end it is now.

 

The truth here is simple. You want to dump you current BF so you can start seeing this other man. Dumping someone to be with someone else is a hurtful thing to do. It just is. It doesn't matter that you still care for your BF. It doesn't amtter that you don't want to hurt him. He is going to be utterly devasted, no matter what.

 

He may well end up hating you. Can you blame him? You can't have it both ways. You cannot dump someone for someone else AND expect the person you dumped to keep being your friend. That's ridiculous. If your current BF never wants to see you again for the rest of his life, if that is what he needs in order to get over this, you need to respect that.

[lisal0u]

From being in your boyfriends position please talk to him and be totally honest! Don't sugar coat it or try to make him feel better cos it actually makes it worse!

 

I was with my boyfriend 14 years and he left me and is now best friends with another woman, he swears they are just friends but I know he's lying! Please just be honest!

 

Seriously think about your decision too as there won't be any going back, it's unlikely the hurt you may cause cannot be fixed! You can't expect him to wait around while you play the field!

 

If you are thinking about other men that way then there is a major problem! You either have to decide to fix things TOGETHER if it's possible or be honest and walk away.

 

I wish I'd been given the chance to fix things but I haven't but I do deserve honesty and so does your boyfriend.

[ohwhyme]

So I was the boyfriend that cared more. We got back together and we broke up again. There is no way in hell I will go back to her or have any contact with her. I told her to never talk to me again but I know she's going to talk to me when things go badly. So I'm going to tell her to f* off. Remember the grass is not always greener on the other side.

[EYECANDY000]

 

I really want to try dating other people, but he isn't going to allow that. But at the same time, I almost wanted to meet someone else when I went on vacation. I want the excitement of dating someone new, !

 

 

sounds to me like its over on your end.

[Mimsicles]

I think in your head you already think its over. But please think about it before you end things as you will most prob never have contact with him again. If you can live with that then finish it.

 

I have just been dumped by my boyfriend of 3 years because he similarly to you had met somebody else. He didn't tell me this when he ended things, he just said he didn't think he wanted to be with me anymore.

 

He expects me to hang about and wait for him to decide what he wants. He has no idea i'm aware of his other girl. But now i never want to see him again for the lies, hurt he has put me through. I'm afraid to say that your bf may not want to see you again either. But please be honest with your partner as it's the least he deserves