Using a pickup line. Does a woman already know when you are using one?

[pdq]

There are many suggestions on how men can start a converation with a woman by using a pickup line. The problem I have is, don't women already know you are using a pickup line? I would have to imagine that if I use a pickup line on a woman in today's dating society, she would have to be naive to not know this.

 

Here is a scenario: I complement a woman about her clothing. Does she already know I am "hitting" on her? If she knows this and continues the conversation, do I assume she is interested?

Edited April 3, 2010 by pdq

[LucreziaBorgia]

It depends really. The difference between really liking something you are wearing and a pickup line are clear. Girls are generally aware by your body language and how you say things whether you are picking her up or not.

 

If she was completely not interested, she'd probably just say 'thanks' and go about her business. Beware though - even low interest levels can lead to conversations and simply stop there.

[pdq]

If you are saying that a woman can detect when a man is sincere or not I get that; however, I would think that most of the time men are not really sincere, but they are just using something to strick up a conversation. How many men strick up a conversation with a female stranger if it is not to pickup? So regardless if I am sincere or not I would have to imagine that a woman would assume that I am using a pickup line. No?

[jthorne]

What is it you're really asking? How to pick up a girl for a ONS, or how to start an actual conversation with a girl? Or are you asking how to be smooth without being caught?

[EYECANDY000]

Im able to accept a compliment and just take it as that.. but if its a ovious pick up line, then i dont give them the time of day. Why waste your time on pick up lines , just be yourself.

[pdq]

@jthorne

Not looking fot a ONS, but interested in getting to know her. What I am trying to say is this: Do men typically compliment female strangers other than to "hit" on them?

 

@EYECANDY000

 

EYECANDY000, for example, a guy - complete stranger - compliments you on your clothing. Maybe he says something nice about your shoes and he could totally be legit and sincere. Even if he is just being friendly, is there any indication in your mind that he is actually "hitting" on you? What other reason would there be for a guy to compliment a woman who is a complete stranger, just to be friendly?

 

You get what I am saying?

 

My problem is that I "psych" myself out of starting a conversation with a complete stranger even if it is to pay a compliment, because I assume the woman puts up her defenses with the mind set that she knows she is being hit on. Quite frankly she would be right. What other reason would there be? Because I am interested in her shoes as if I would like to own a pair myself??? That is the whole point of pickup lines and self help guides on using them. Begs the question, do pickup lines actually work? are they already expected by women and assumed when a man starts a conversation?

Edited April 4, 2010 by pdq

[norajane]

Yes, if you compliment a woman's shoes, she thinks it's either a pick-up line or you are gay.

 

To start a conversation, say something like, "Hi, I'm Mike. You have such a beautiful/friendly/pretty smile. What's your name?"

 

At that point, she'll either be sending out stay away from me signals, or she'll smile and you'll not only see the pretty smile, but you'll have her feeling good and you won't be talking about her stupid shoes which you don't give a damn about anyway and she knows it.

 

The fact is, if you're walking up to a strange woman to talk to her, she already knows you're there to try to chat her up no matter what you specifically say to her. So, you're better off keeping it simple and saying something sweet about her smile than about her shoes.

[pdq]

The fact is, if you're walking up to a strange woman to talk to her, she already knows you're there to try to chat her up no matter what you specifically say to her. So, you're better off keeping it simple and saying something sweet about her smile than about her shoes.

 

That's what I thought. If she sticks around to converse, I guess she is interested.

[Sevenscars]

From personal experience, women ALWAYS know when you are picking them up. Sometimes women even think you're trying to pick them up when you're really not! So yes, when you are using a "pickup line," and even when you are not, women do know. So just be genuine.

 

If you do try to pick up a woman and she continues the conversation, that does not mean she is interested. It's just a conversation. Some women continue conversation with a stranger, even if they already know they are going to deny them from the moment they walk up (that was a rough lesson to learn!) You'll have to look for clues, for instance her body language (whether she is pointing towards you, playing with her hair, etc), eye contact (more means she likes looking at you! as do dilated pupils), how much she smiles/laughs and if she seems to be enjoying herself, general things that are easy to distinguish and tell you that someone is interested in you! Listen to your intuition, if it seems like she is bored, she probably is!

[Sevenscars]

From personal experience, women ALWAYS know when you are picking them up. Sometimes women even think you're trying to pick them up when you're really not! So yes, when you are using a "pickup line," and even when you are not, women do know. So just be genuine.

 

If you do try to pick up a woman and she continues the conversation, that does not mean she is interested. It's just a conversation. Some women continue conversation with a stranger, even if they already know they are going to deny them from the moment they walk up (that was a rough lesson to learn!) You'll have to look for clues, for instance her body language (whether she is pointing towards you, playing with her hair, etc), eye contact (more means she likes looking at you! as do dilated pupils), how much she smiles/laughs and if she seems to be enjoying herself, general things that are easy to distinguish and tell you that someone is interested in you! Listen to your intuition, if it seems like she is bored, she probably is!

[Engadget]

Pickup lines are silly, just say hello, I noticed you from over there and wanted to introduce myself or something of the like.

[bac]

It is fine to use pick-up lines. Yes, girls know that men might want to pick them up even without pick-up lines. When a man just looks at me a little bit longer, I know what he wants.

There is no secret of what actually men want. All men are the same about what they want. Generally, if you do not want to have sex with a female, there is something very wrong with you.

Unfortunately, most often men are afraid of rejection and they will do nothing.

So, if you are brave enough to say a few words to a girl, that is all great because it really does not matter what you say.

[sally4sara]

Yeah, they know when its a line. I certainly knew.

 

Best bet is to be obvious but funny about it. Even if they are not available or interested, you might get a laugh. And it goes a long way to making you seem like it wasn't a big deal if you get shot down.

[bac]

You'll have to look for clues, for instance her body language (whether she is pointing towards you, playing with her hair, etc), eye contact (more means she likes looking at you! as do dilated pupils), how much she smiles/laughs and if she seems to be enjoying herself, general things that are easy to distinguish and tell you that someone is interested in you! Listen to your intuition, if it seems like she is bored, she probably is!

 

As a female, I would say that it is 50/50, especially for younger girls.