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Posted

have been seeing a guy for 2 months and at first he was full on - asking me to be his girlfriend introducing me to his family, letting me spend time with his son. He even said he loves me.

 

Then after the weekend he said he wants to slow things down. That I deserve better than him and he wants me in his life in 20 years so he would rather be my friend than have us break up and me end up hating him.

 

But then he said "I'm not full breaking up with you" and he still calls me his girlfriend and we either see each other or speak everyday - and yesterday he was talking about us moving in together. I'm 23 and he is 31 and apart from his babymama I am the only girl he has ever called his girlfriend (he has been a playboy most of his life).

I really feel like there is something there and even his best mate said that I should keep trying and that he is just scared. But I'm scared of getting hurt too?

Should I give him a break and accept that it will take time for him to adjust to having a girlfriend or should I tell him that slowing things down is no good for me and break it off?

Note: I'm 100% sure he isnt using me for sex because he always wants me with him when he has his son or sees his family.

Posted (edited)

I'm shocked at how naive this post is. He's not trying to break up with you. He's trying to keep you around while sleeping with other women. Isn't it obvious? You even said he was player. You said the way he treats you makes you unhappy but want to know if you should stick around?

Edited by Ilovecake
Posted

Ah.

The classic "Mr Commitment-phobe-with-one-foot-jammed-in-the-door" type.

 

Good luck with that.

 

Don't settle for half-measures.

tell him: "We either do this full-on, or we don't. But don't yank my chain, don't play with my emotions, and don't pizz up my leg and tell me it's raining."

Posted

The fact he takes you to see his son and family has nothing to do with it. He doesn't want you as a GF, he wants you as a FWB. Many guys prefer FWB to having a GF. In a FWB, the guy gets all the benefits of having a GF, but with no strings. It is the ultimate win/win situation for him. Many guys will try for a FWB if they can get it, and only settle for having a GF if they can't.

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