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Exes With Children


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Posted

My ex has a child. My exes' ex came to visit (we were helping each other deal with the crazy, and came to care for each other a great deal), and she thought of me...she wanted me to spend one last afternoon with the child. My exes' ex understands that our time of contact needs to end for me to heal in a healthy way. She's been down a similar path before me.

 

Knowing it had to end at some point, I'm grateful I got a chance to see the child one last time.

 

The exes' ex moved further away from the ex. This is a good thing, but the child was so clingy as a result.

 

It's so hard. It's heartbreaking when you come to love someone's child, and they love you but you know you can no longer see them.

Posted
It's so hard. It's heartbreaking when you come to love someone's child, and they love you but you know you can no longer see them.

well thats life deux ex machina - what can you do?

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Posted
well thats life deux ex machina - what can you do?

 

I know, alpha. I knew it was coming, too. I've been looking at it in a pretty philosophical way, similar to what you've written, really.

 

It just hurts right now.

Posted
It just hurts right now.

hugs and kisses (((((deux ex machina)))))

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Posted
hugs and kisses (((((deux ex machina)))))

 

:love: Thank you.

Posted

I totally understand where you are coming from. I was prepared to love my ex's kids like they were my own, and they actually admitted to my ex that they liked me the best (out of ALL my ex's exes :) ), so it really does hurt to know that I won't get to hang out with them anymore. They were great kiddos. And this is coming from someone who never really was comfortable around kids until I met them. I hope they're okay, and that my ex doesn't mess them up too badly.

  • Author
Posted (edited)
I totally understand where you are coming from. I was prepared to love my ex's kids like they were my own, and they actually admitted to my ex that they liked me the best (out of ALL my ex's exes :) ), so it really does hurt to know that I won't get to hang out with them anymore. They were great kiddos. And this is coming from someone who never really was comfortable around kids until I met them. I hope they're okay, and that my ex doesn't mess them up too badly.

 

I'm so sorry ((Tamia)). I totally relate to the worrying/wondering, hoping for the best.

 

You were such a great influence on those kids. Thank you for posting. I don't feel so alone in feeling what I do.

Edited by deux ex machina
Posted

yeah.... that is the problem with dating someone who has children, if/when it ends you lose more than just your partner... you lose the little ones too...

 

ive dated a couple girls with kids... sometimes i missed the child more than i missed the mother :o

  • Author
Posted
yeah.... that is the problem with dating someone who has children, if/when it ends you lose more than just your partner... you lose the little ones too...

 

ive dated a couple girls with kids... sometimes i missed the child more than i missed the mother :o

 

Yes, I hear you there! I don't miss the guy much, because he comes with a whole boatload of pain...but I do miss the kid.

 

I understand "that's life", and thankfully with enough time in between it wasn't an emotional scene. In a way, it felt right...it's just a shame. I don't know -- guess I feel quiet right now.

 

On another level, in regard to the ex - it's not grief at this point, I'm past that - but acceptance. That final little filament that kept me connected is now gone.

 

Thank you.

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