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Posted

...and I'm back on LS to tell the tale.

In short: After a few months of an affair, I broke it off because it was too painful to see that he was not near separating, stayed NC for a very rough 2 month. He emailed me for New Year, I told him to not recontact me unless he was divorced and I thought it was all over.

I ran into him in the street. We stopped and talked. Then we went for coffee. I didn't like him nearly as much as when I had broken it off the first time, as he minimized the meaning of the affair for both of us, and I thought, this guy is a jerk, I'm glad to realize this now instead of fantasizing over what could have been.

Over, right?

 

Not nearly.

We slept together again the week after. My choice.

And a few times after that.

 

In the meantime, I've dated plenty. After a 2-month relationship that felt promising, I got dumped on Valentine's day, no less.

 

Not all is dark. I've rebuilt a strong social life, go out often, take classes and generally enjoy myself.

 

I can't shake him off, though, although I know he's not for me. Sometimes are harder than others. NC didn;t do that great for me. I think I need to see it through until it dies its natural death.

 

It's not all black and white. Sex is splendid and I enjoy his company when I see him but he will never be my partner. There's sadness in that.

 

And as I'm looking and multiplying chances for romantic encounters, and I'm meeting many, many unsuitable partners, I'm wondering whether I will ever find someone I can feel something for, like I did with him.

 

That's where I am. I guess I'm just...a little hopeless at the monent. Thanks for reading....

Posted

Hi Luckyluss,

 

I am so glad you are taking classes and keeping yourself busy .. It seems that anything we can do to benefit our future during these times - is definitely a step in the right direction.

 

You say you are meeting many unsuitable partners.. How would you like to be married to one of them .. See, things can always be worse.. ha .. You do have something to look forward to in waiting for that special (right) man ..

 

And yes, I believe too - that these wrong relationships must run their course - and into that wonderful state of independence and Indifference .. Stay reading with LS - that can be very beneficial for you ..

 

take care

Posted

You cant see what's in front of you whilst craning your neck and looking at that which is behind you.

 

You go nowhere as long as you do this. Leave him and look straight ahead.

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