supersub Posted March 28, 2010 Posted March 28, 2010 It's been 8 weeks NC. Today is Sunday and its always the hardest day for me. I've stayed busy all weekend. Working out, studying, small projects. Hanging with Friends but in the midst of all that you still feel the void. I know its getting better, but there's always a piece of me wondering about her. How about others on this forum? Which days are the hardest for you? How do you deal with it?
Rearden Metal Posted March 28, 2010 Posted March 28, 2010 Every day has it's challenges. Weekends without plans are very difficult. You're doing really well! I deal with it by setting records for number of posts on LS, playing poker, going to the gym and drawing/reading. All of these are isolated things I.E. I do them alone, but I find myself increasingly comfortable in my own skin again. I'm also pleased that I seem to be becoming a better man. I take pride in that.
Author supersub Posted March 28, 2010 Author Posted March 28, 2010 Every day has it's challenges. Weekends without plans are very difficult. You're doing really well! I deal with it by setting records for number of posts on LS, playing poker, going to the gym and drawing/reading. All of these are isolated things I.E. I do them alone, but I find myself increasingly comfortable in my own skin again. I'm also pleased that I seem to be becoming a better man. I take pride in that. Cheers RM. I've been reading your comments a lot my friend, and you seem to be doing really well too. Staying busy. Keep it up man. I think its not a bad thing to do things in isolation, because you are learning to be comfortable being alone again, which I think a lot of people do not do, and it causes them to bury their feelings rather than deal with them.
Rearden Metal Posted March 28, 2010 Posted March 28, 2010 Agreed. The void the other person leaves is hard to face. That's why people rebound. I'm proud that I haven't rebounded and that I've entered counseling and kept myself occupied and busy while being attentive to my own needs and feelings. People on this site have helped me tremendously. It's a fantastic healing resource.
Always A Lesson Posted March 28, 2010 Posted March 28, 2010 Me too Reardon this site has healing powers. Don't know what I'd do without it. Great pic Reardon.
soyou Posted March 28, 2010 Posted March 28, 2010 Weekends are also the hardest time for. This is a part of my diary this morning when I showered with tears. About 6 weeks ago, I knew the shocking and heart breaking news that my boyfriend of 2.5 year already got a wife and slept with many women while we were in a relationship. I broke it off. He tried to get me back but I refused....Generally, I am doing ok, get myself busy with works, study, paiting, and gyming.... It's the weekend that I often feel so empty and loney and always wonder how he has been doing.... EMPTY (This diary I wrote to myself this morning) It has been a while since I got the news and it has been a while since everything happened. Sometimes, it feels like so easy to let go Sometimes, it feels like I am already over it Sometimes, it feels like I am so brave and strong ..... There are some weak moments that It's still hard for me to hold my tears It's hard for me to feel fulfilled It's hard for me to not feel empty inside .... I just wonder why...... Why me? Why everything turns out to be a white, sad, and cruel lie ..... I am not angry I am not pissed I dont feel bitter I dont even hate you .... I just feel sad, empty, betrayed For all the love I've given you I asked myself of why I was blind for so long .... Nothing could change my decision I've made Nothing could get me back to the same old me before Nothing could be able to make me want you again Still, It's not easy to not feel empty inside ............... To get rid of a habit, it takes you months to let go To get rid of a person, who used to be a huge part of my life It must take time ..... Sometimes, I stand close by my the kitchen's window Stay motionless Watch all the cars coming and going I remember the old me When I used to stay beside that window To wait for you come over and leave ..... All the habits that I've built up with you, and for you I've to give all up Sometimes, I just stand next to that window for hours Just stand still Even Peter (my flatmate) could see and feel my pain Why cant you? .... Many nights I cant sleep Many days I feel empty There is this a big hole in my heart, my soul, and my mind Which I dont know when it will be filled ...... Before, I used to think of a family with you, our kids For whatever I did, I thought for us, not only for me Now, I've to think for myself To go on the path, of only me It just feels so empty .......... Somtimes, I think of you being with your wife And with your kids, maybe....I dont know Do you hear my voice call your name all the time Do you hear me say all the time "Be happy. Live well. Dont hurt anyone anymore" .......... Do you know how hard it is Morning when I'm awake You are still the first one cross my mind Nights before I sleep You are the last one cross my mind I rememer everything about you, just as clear as crystal And it just hurts like hell I see your smiles I see you holding me I see you looking at me I see us drinking acohol and getting drunk together I see us dancing when we were drunk Do you know how hard it is For whatever I see, I hear I still think of you? Do you know how sad it is To know that you mean the world to me But I mean nothing to you Do you know how heart breaking it is To know what I've always loved and thought of you But it never goes the same way with you ......... Saterdays seem unbearable Saterdays used to be your day with me I've to run away from everything, which is related to you... .............. One day, one day, very soon When I read these things again I am sure I will laugh so hard of why I could just not forgot ...... Out of the empty feelings inside I am doing cool.... Goodbye
MrsPeaSoup Posted March 29, 2010 Posted March 29, 2010 Beautiful post Soyou. My diary entries are a bit much the same, only I talk to an unknown reader instead of to my ex And @ Supersub: Weekends are also the hardest for me. It's been my third weekend without him, right now, and it's getting even harder not having him around (we had a LDR, because he left to the other side of the country to university). Also, the real hard times are the nights when you go to bed, because you lie there really alone with your thoughts. And when I start to think about him again, I often can't sleep untill the next morning: 5.30 am. Hope you don't have that, though!
confused and broken Posted March 29, 2010 Posted March 29, 2010 weekends are definitely harder especially Friday and Saturday nights
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