MrsPeaSoup Posted March 24, 2010 Posted March 24, 2010 (edited) Hello everyone, I've read several threads on this forum after founding this site when I was searching for the right answer in google. You all sound so supportive and friendly in here, it is really touching, even when it is not my problem that i'm reading on the forum, but someone elses. I want to ask you all what I should do. Here's my story, and I'm sorry it's so long.. I'll put a summary in the end (just skip to that if you don't want to read the long version): 2 years of perfect happines, perfect love. This was the real deal: what all the poets and writers and philosophers couldn't describe with words; I felt it. We felt it. Often I felt so filled with this deep love that I thought I was drowning in it, that my heart couldn't take any more of this love and it poured right down out of my eyes; tears would fell down because of the perfectness of the whole thing. He was the one who allways said it to me: we were meant for each other. This was meant to be and meant to last. Now, I had some troubles letting him take over my whole heart, but he just kept going and going and making me feel special and perfect that after 1,5 years I lost my heart to him. I felt so blessed, because everything was just as it should be and the best thing was that he felt exactly the same way! Now, 2 years later, he says he doesn't have that 'magical' feeling anymore, he hasn't got the butterflies any more and he told me he doesn't love me any more. How did that come around? After 1,5 years we both started college (studies?) in different part of the country. I live in Holland, the distances are relatively small, but still it took 3.5 h with the train to get to him. From that point things started to get bad. Everything was still perfect if we were together, but when we were apart we couldn't communicate. MSN was a real relationship killer and texting also increasingly became a killer. We just interpreted everything the other said in a wrong way and only got mad at each other. Almost each time we saw each other (that was almost every weekend in the beginning, in the end even less than that) we had to overcome that barrier of negative energy before we could be happy with each other again. This resulted in even worser and foolisher fights and in the end, I think he just couldn't take it any more. He broke up with me. And now, I'm left all alone, or so it feels. A deep feeling of emptiness is left inside of me. It also feels as if he died or amputated me or something. Some info of his personality (which could be relevant for you): - he's 20 years now (I'm 19) - he is a real Beta person: there's only black and white, almost no grey. 0's and 1's: these are the only two things that matter: no 0,5's. - he can't communicate and talk about his feelings that well. - it is really too hard for him to understand that other people think different than he does: with me he didn't really want to understand WHY I thought differently than he did on certain matters. - I get the feeling that if he's made a decision, he weighed the pros and cons in his head real quick, but thouroughly, and only let you know the answer, not the reasoning behind it and if he's made a decision it's really hard to get him off of it. - he has wonderfull aspects as well, but that would make it too long a list I really love him, still, and I think he is perfect for me. And I am convinced I am perfect for him as well. I want to get him back. How and when should I try this? Or should I just leave him and try to continue with my life? Please, help me, I don't know what to do and I'm too afraid to do the wrong thing that will scare him off even more which will never bring him back to me. ============================================= SUMMARY: - 2 years of perfect happines: we were (ARE!!) perfect for each other: it's meant to be - beginning of the schoolyear we both started college in different towns: 3.5 h of travelling between us - lots of problems because of this: communication was bad - he did everything there he could do, except school: like a young puppy trying everything out. - too much tears and sorrow when we were apart: everytime need to overcome barrier of negative energy - I was his first girlfriend ever; not used having contact with girls that closely. - I really want him back: lost my heart on him - Can't imagine a life without him. - Want's advice on what to do: win him back y/n? How long should I wait before taking action and How Should I proceed? =============================================== Phew, that was a long post. Sorry again for the longitude. Hope you have some good advice for me! PS: I am a big big BIG believer in real love and that you should fight for it. Edited March 24, 2010 by MrsPeaSoup
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