RocknRory Posted March 24, 2010 Posted March 24, 2010 Long story short, girlfriend broke up with me 2nights ago because (weve been dating nearly 2months) after a month she started to be more mean more often, like a new person, and she warned me about it within the first week but I didnt think it would be this bad. Shes very pretty but I love it when shes nice, shes fun to be around and I don't like bitching, I wanted to fix that! Anyway she told me it would be better if we were just friends because then we wouldnt be fighting, after confusion among myself I agreed and acted kind of happy about it. Anyway last night I drove over 30miles to the next town where she lives to hang out with my other friends (I brought a friend with me) and we hung out with Lisa(ex's name) and her brother. We didn't talk much til later, but then it was like I didn't want to be around her because she still had a negative kind of vibe going, but in a weird way. Anyway we went home and my friend found out that night why she broke up with me... and he made the mistake of telling me. Before he told me I felt fine and ready to move on. After he told me that she broke up with me because of the fight we had (I called her a ***** and hungup because i was tired of it.. mistake maybe) but it was because I wasn't strict enough with her about her drug problem and the like. When he told me that on the drive home I become kind of quiet and depressed. All of a sudden I wanted to get back with her because of the good times we used to have and to basically get a "Second Chance". Heres some samples of TXT messeges i sent last night: Me: Hey Lisa Her: hey, whats up? Me: were friends right? Her: of course! Me: Well then if were "friends" why are you acting mean as if we were going out. I thought everything was gonna change if we were friends. Her: I wasnt acting mean wtf Me: as some points it was pretty bad... Me: Im just tired of negative feelings. You were nice for the first month, but it felt like you stopped caring after that. I thought being friends would make it better, but i felt like nothing has changed. Just more negativity. Me: Im not asking you to take me back or whatever, I just want things to be back when I first started hanging out with you, I miss it. how about you? (She didnt reply after 45min so i answered..) Me: So your just gonna ignore me? I guess you dont care at all lisa, not even as a friend.. She called me when i was sleeping an hour later and left a voicemail saying that her and a friend were taking a bath and eating and said I was overreacting and a few over stuff and to call her in the morning. I'm so damn confused. Could I get her back if I tried? Do I want her back? Please help guys n gals...thanks Also, WHAT should I say to her later this morning when I call her back? Should I try to act like Im not bothered, or should I try to find out why we were fighting all the time and what not. I don't want to ask her to take me back, I want her to WANT me back (or just get over it completely..) Should I just try to stop seeing her for a while? She mentioned she would go to my prom in a month still (we had that planned when we were dating)
boogieboy Posted March 24, 2010 Posted March 24, 2010 Dood, she doesnt have a personality disorder, she just isnt attracted to you anymore, so you CANT get her back. Move on to someone new. She agreed to be friends hoping you would leave her alone. Shes ignoring your texts, that means she doesnt want to hear from you, thats why she's being mean. Shes trying to give you a hint that you should go away, but she doesnt want to say it. Leave her alone, go find someone who likes you-before you find out shes seeing someone. Theres no second chance here. Ignore her texts or calls, dont ever talk to her again, theres no friendship here. No use in trying to make anything of it.
txsilkysmoothe Posted March 24, 2010 Posted March 24, 2010 You don't want her back. Did you say drug problem? She was casting you as the bad guy to your friend rather than taking any responsibility for the break-up. That's not nice. And you seem willing to accept a certain level of mistreatment from her. That isn't healthy. You have a month to find a date for the prom. Get busy!
Author RocknRory Posted March 25, 2010 Author Posted March 25, 2010 Thank you txsilkysmoothe (: I've learned from more stuff we have gone through that she has issues and is just bad news. You have to be happy by yourself to be happy with a girl, applies to girls too =) Basically she still wants to be friends now but is acting like a jerk in a way, just less obvious. What should i do?
boogieboy Posted March 25, 2010 Posted March 25, 2010 Thank you txsilkysmoothe (: I've learned from more stuff we have gone through that she has issues and is just bad news. You have to be happy by yourself to be happy with a girl, applies to girls too =) Basically she still wants to be friends now but is acting like a jerk in a way, just less obvious. What should i do? You dont want to be friends with her, you want a gf. SO you CANT be friends. Cut her off entirely, she doesnt deserve your friendship. Go get another girl quick.
txsilkysmoothe Posted March 26, 2010 Posted March 26, 2010 Why would you want a friend who is a jerk? You really shouldn't allow her to take up so much space in your life. I think you should concentrate on meeting a new girl, a nice one.
MalachiX Posted March 26, 2010 Posted March 26, 2010 Basically she still wants to be friends now but is acting like a jerk in a way, just less obvious. What should i do? Why don't you stop worrying about her and worry about yourself? You're broken up now. You're NOT dating anymore. That means you don't have the right to demand she explain her moods to you during texts. That means you don't have the right to criticize her if you think she's in a negative mood. That means you don't have the right to complain if she takes a while to text you back. You claimed to be trying to do the just friends thing but you're not. If a friend is in a negative mood, you don't text them later and demand to know why. You also don't get angry at them if it takes more than 45 minutes to text you back (hell, some of my friends take all day to return a text). You're not acting like a friend. You're acting like a jilted lover. Clearly you're not ready to be friends with her so don't be. Avoid her until you're over her and then maybe you can be friends.
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