Kris30 Posted March 24, 2010 Posted March 24, 2010 A little background. I've been on a couple dates with a real sweet guy, and while I hadn't been sure about him (not sure he's my type & also he's 40 & I'm 28), I've been thinking of him more & more lately. Last date I didn't let him kiss me & I barely hugged him, but I'm thinking next date I wanna kiss him. He seems interested. He sent me really pretty flowers after our first date (sweet!). He has also already asked for another date for next week. Last night he called and we spoke briefly b/c I was baby-sitting. He called back later, but I couldn't get to my phone and he left a message saying he would try to get in touch w/me today. He didn't call. I'm a bit disappointed as I was looking forward to talking to him. So when a guy doesn't call is it an indicator that he's not interested? Or just maybe busy? What are you all's thoughts??
D-Lish Posted March 24, 2010 Posted March 24, 2010 Well he did call back... You didn't answer, or call him back. I mean, that's okay- but if he's been doing all the flower-sending and calling and asking out, and you haven't kissed him yet- he may have come to the conclusion that you aren't interested enough since he isn't getting much reciprocation. The way you ended it is that he called back and you didn't call him back. It's great to set up the chase, but be careful not to shoot yourself in the foot by being too aloof.
Chicago_Guy Posted March 24, 2010 Posted March 24, 2010 A little background. I've been on a couple dates with a real sweet guy, and while I hadn't been sure about him (not sure he's my type & also he's 40 & I'm 28), I've been thinking of him more & more lately. Last date I didn't let him kiss me & I barely hugged him, but I'm thinking next date I wanna kiss him. He seems interested. He sent me really pretty flowers after our first date (sweet!). He has also already asked for another date for next week. Last night he called and we spoke briefly b/c I was baby-sitting. He called back later, but I couldn't get to my phone and he left a message saying he would try to get in touch w/me today. He didn't call. I'm a bit disappointed as I was looking forward to talking to him. So when a guy doesn't call is it an indicator that he's not interested? Or just maybe busy? What are you all's thoughts?? This guy almost certainly assumes that you are not interested if you have been on two dates and you haven't kissed him and have only barely hugged him.
Author Kris30 Posted March 24, 2010 Author Posted March 24, 2010 At first I wasn't sure if I was interested... Now I am. So how can I let him know I am? Maybe send him a text tomorrow while he's at work saying I hope he's having a good day??
D-Lish Posted March 24, 2010 Posted March 24, 2010 At first I wasn't sure if I was interested... Now I am. So how can I let him know I am? Maybe send him a text tomorrow while he's at work saying I hope he's having a good day?? I think that would be a good idea since he might need some sort of encouargement.
Author Kris30 Posted March 24, 2010 Author Posted March 24, 2010 K thanks. Should I let him know I'm thinking of him or just say I hope he's having a good day? Sorry I haven't dated in a while...
D-Lish Posted March 24, 2010 Posted March 24, 2010 K thanks. Should I let him know I'm thinking of him or just say I hope he's having a good day? Sorry I haven't dated in a while... I'd just say " hey, hoping your day is going well". Leave it at that. Just remember, you still don't know him well- so keep it light. He may just need that green light that in his opinion he hasn't witnessed as of yet. If he doesn't respond to that- don't pursue him further.
boogieboy Posted March 24, 2010 Posted March 24, 2010 K thanks. Should I let him know I'm thinking of him or just say I hope he's having a good day? Sorry I haven't dated in a while... Make sure if he responds to this you tell him youre looking forward to seeing him, because right now he thinks youre not interested. You will have to convince him that youre still interested.
Austen Posted March 24, 2010 Posted March 24, 2010 He's gonna move on to someone else if you don't start showing some interest. Texting him is a great idea. Something like: Sorry I missed your call. I hope you're having a great day
tincanman99 Posted March 24, 2010 Posted March 24, 2010 Speaking as a guy, if I contacted you and you didnt respond or you were being lukewarm as not kissing/touching I would back off. My rule of thumb is 2 contacts (be it voice, txt or email) and you dont respond and I am gone. Lack of response = no interest on your part. I wont pursue women indefinitely hoping they will change their mind, I am not there to convince anybody of anything. If you dont like me, thats fine, I move on. Modern technology is extremely reliable so the excuse that you didnt get it really doesnt work. One contact and you not getting the message is ok but two messages, no way. I would txt him to just say hi or ask him how his day is. Thats loose and casual and you are not putting him or yourself on the spot. By doing this it indicates you are still interested.
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