ms.ac Posted March 22, 2010 Posted March 22, 2010 kinda long but.... so our breakup was pretty messy as i was really hurt.. he came back and started to reconcile while he was seeing someone else at the same time.. long story short,, he "picked" the other girl ( 5 years older, divorced, with kid, lives with parents.. possibly into drugs.. real catch) and ended our 4 and a half year relationship, well after 2 months of no contact and me knowing he was with her and went on vaca with her he contacts me.. i dont answer,, he calls me 2 more times the next month.. i finally talk to him this month when he contacts me again.. it was a good convo.. i didnt know if he was regretting or feeling guilty.. so i talk to him again.. anther great convo.. talking about good times we had.. talking about things we loved together.. making jokes about us... i had seen him driving with a girl which i assumed was his very unattractive new girl.. he didnt confirm it but rather made excuses like he hangs out with girls now.. just as friends and made comments like he was single... so a week passes.. and we tlak... and he tells me he lost his job.. but in his personality tries to act like he has it better than me cuz he gets the summer off.. and tells me his girl quit her job too.. which i was like girl?? u acted like you were single.. well long story short.. he was saying bad things about her.. shes a bad mother,, its all about the money cuz her parents are rich.. that he wasnt ready to get married thats why he left me... that he doesnt love her.. that it isnt serious.. blah blah blah.. well he tells me to go to his house see his parents and hang out iwth him.. i thought this was strange.. he says his parents still havent met her.. even tho she is always there so its not a big deal becasue we are just friends.. i didnt expect to get so upset seeing some of her stuff there but i did.. and as a result he was throwing things in my face about stuff he bought her... now he was changing all the stuff he said about her and acting like he cared about her..but at the same time still saying the difference between me and her was that im someone to marry.. shes not.. and that hes too young for that.. now when he got with her while he was still kinda with me.. we thought i was pregnant and he told me she didnt care.. i would be alone if i was and they would be together and it would suck for me... i know this is b*tchy.. but they didnt care how i felt then.. so long story short.. he pretty much cheated on her with me that night... and after he freaked out .. said he couldnt believe he did that.. that he's not an a**hole.. he cares about her.. and wants to be with her.. that he doesnt care about me anymore.. that he can look at me and tell me that he doesnt have any feelings towards me anymore.. of course this hurt me because he has been with her for 4 months.. i was with him for 4.5 years.. im just confused.. im happy because i can see he hasnt changed.. but now im hurting because it seems he no longer cares about me at all... im confused.. i dont know what to believe.. and i know that i shouldnt have done wat i did.. and i know i shouldnt have even talked to him.. its so hard when you love someone.. this world just doesnt make sense.. i know he is bad for me.. he even said.. you are good for me but i am bad for you.. which is completely true.. someone give me advice.. im hurting... he needs to grow up.. and i need to move on.. what am i thinking!! im so embarrassed...
Rearden Metal Posted March 22, 2010 Posted March 22, 2010 He sounds like a huge loser. You're way better off without him!
Author ms.ac Posted March 22, 2010 Author Posted March 22, 2010 i know im just so confused... does he really not care about me at all.. he told me the reason he was contacting me was because he had gotten to a point where it didn't matter to him anymore so when he saw me or something that reminded him of me he could just call to see how i was doing... this is weird.. after 2 months ... i dont know.. and he also tried to say his gf knew he talks to me and that we are friends.. and shes ok with it.. im going to take a wild guess that she doesnt and wouldnt be ok with him talking to his ex.. recent ex of almost 5 years.. last week when i talked to him he even said that he thought he made a mistake but there was nothing he could do about it.. now his whole story changes.. and i know he thinks he could just get me back adn thats what aggrivates me the most.. he even said if i wanted you back i could have you rightnow.... but i dont want you.. i said no you couldnt.. and he just laughed.. i wish i knew a way to make him realize he really cant and he lost... i know.. not talking to him at all...
LovelyDaze Posted March 22, 2010 Posted March 22, 2010 he even said if i wanted you back i could have you rightnow.... but i dont want you.. i said no you couldnt.. and he just laughed.. i wish i knew a way to make him realize he really cant and he lost... i know.. not talking to him at all... THAT even made ME upset...and he's not even my ex! Definitely show him that you mean business by never accepting another call, text or e-mail again. NEVER! When he laughed, he thought about how you let him back in after the breakup so he truly believes you are weak enough to keep letting him back in your life with no real effort on his part to fix what broke in your relationship. Delete his number,messages, and e-mails when you receive them. He also laughed because he is enjoying the game of it all. How sick is that? Go NC on this loser for good. You deserve a man who will treat you beautifully, not like a fool.
worlybear Posted March 22, 2010 Posted March 22, 2010 He sounds just like my ex. He's probably got undiagnosed bi-polar disorder too! Try and stand back from him.
Author ms.ac Posted March 22, 2010 Author Posted March 22, 2010 He sounds just like my ex. He's probably got undiagnosed bi-polar disorder too! Try and stand back from him. so you feel my pain, because I am almost positive he has some sort of disorder, his mom is a psychologist and believes he does as well... he is so hot and cold.. feels one way one week, another way another week, he would even go into periods of depression... the biggest problem is.. that i love him.. ughh wouldn't it be great if there was a switch that you could just flip off..
Tamia78 Posted March 22, 2010 Posted March 22, 2010 I know you can't flip a switch, but NC is a GREAT start with this idiot. I know you want to hear from him and all............but you don't need him. At all. He's a loser, an idiot, an *********.....I could go on. What nerve of him to just use you like that, and make you feel like crap all for his ego! Ugh! Use all of the willpower you have (I'll give you some, if that's what it's gonna take , and go NC on his a$$. Don't answer any calls, texts, ever. Period. Wow...I can't believe how upset reading that has made me. Can I kick his butt for you? :-) --T
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