GunSlinger4426 Posted March 20, 2010 Posted March 20, 2010 Hello... I am new to this forum. I figure I have nothing to lose, so here it is... My gf broke up with me about a month ago stating that we are at different points in our lives. She has kids from a previous marriage, we got together immediately after her divorce. At first I didn't take the relationship seriously, I thought I was just a rebound. But our love grew, and we were together for 2.5 years. All this time she has been trying to spend as much time with her kids as possible, her ex husband is bitter and resentful. They now have joint custody. In the past 6 months or so, I saw her interest in me decline. She said that she simply cannot fit us all in her life (her kids and me) and that she cannot be a good mother and a good partner at the same time. I started reading "how to get ex back" materials even before the break up. When it happened, I was prepared, I agreed it was the best thing to do (even though inside I wanted to cry). The next day I sent her en email wishing her good luck and she replied saying that she's having second thoughts. Then I went into NC. Sure enough, 17 days later she called “just to hear my voice”. After that we started casually talking/texting, almost daily. In the meantime she has made some changes in her life, she started running (something that I do), and she doesn't seem emotionally drained as before. At one point she told me she missed me. I still kept my guard up. It's been 4 days now since our last contact (longest since she broke NC) and I am going crazy. But I promised myself I would not initiate contact now, because I did it the last 3 times. I feel that she gave me very positive signs, but now nothing for 4 days and counting. I am worried that I’ll have to go thru all this pain once again, just when I thought I was on the right track to get her back? Any advice? How to proceed? Your thoughts would be greatly appreciated. Thanks
bubbles5 Posted March 23, 2010 Posted March 23, 2010 First of all ur she is much in a mess of handling kids n ex things.So its abovious she is going to give first priority to kids.She may have told u she cant afford to b a good partner cos of her past experience n its like she has responsibilty of kids.Then their can b possibilty she does not want to involve u in her mess.She obviously wants her in her life but she has other things also going on with her life i guess i suppose.Wait for her call , if she doesnt call u bak then u try calling up. Dont let ur ego come between u n her n u r guarding ur emotions thats true but u got to take chances or else how would u know?
GrayClouds Posted March 23, 2010 Posted March 23, 2010 Stick to NC. You were her rebound. She never learn to be on her own after the divorce. Now she as indicated she does not have feeling for you but her behavior towards is because she is lonely, do not confuse her loneliness for anything more then that, otherwise next time she does not feel lonely she will walk away again. Take care of yourself.
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