befreckled Posted March 18, 2010 Posted March 18, 2010 I have been actively dating for the last three months or so. Literally putting myself out there - meeting new people in social settings, online dating websites etc. I have been single for a good part of 4 years after 10 years of being in relationships so I felt I was ready to go back into the dating world. I am not certain what it is but, I find myself analysing every single detail of every date. Fussing about every call, what I do in reaction to that call, how not to be so available. I honestly don't remember things ever being so neurotic in my early twenties (last time I was in a relationship/dating) Does anyone else feel that way? I wish I could just put down my guard and say what I feel, call someone and not worry about being too available, coming across as too eager, too much,...you know just too much.. I am not sure I subscribe to the whole "Gotta be mean to keep em keen". Shoulda woulda coulda, I guess. Tell me I am not alone in this. The last three months has been about the most tiring for me mentally and, I'm not even close to dating someone regularly.
DustySaltus Posted March 18, 2010 Posted March 18, 2010 I believe that we all have to pay our dues in the dating game. The most important thing is to learn as much as you can. Dating is not just about finding someone else, it's about finding yourself. If I went back a few years and saw myself then compared to now I would laugh at some of the mistakes I made. You continue to try and make yourself a better person so that when that woman comes into your life that you are looking for, you are ready to deal with it. Analyzation is fine sometimes but just remember that there are certain things that just cannot be explained. You may go out with a girl a few times, seems like everything is going great and then she just falls of the face of the earth. You're left scratching your head and thinking about what you should and shouldn't have done. I just try and have a sense of humor about this. When you meet the woman you are SUPPOSED to be with you will be nothing but yourself and be so caught up in the moment you won't have time to analyze anything. It will just come natural. Just keep at it. Good luck.
SincereOnlineGuy Posted March 19, 2010 Posted March 19, 2010 I have been actively dating for the last three months or so. Literally putting myself out there - meeting new people in social settings, online dating websites etc. I have been single for a good part of 4 years after 10 years of being in relationships so I felt I was ready to go back into the dating world. I am not certain what it is but, I find myself analysing every single detail of every date. Fussing about every call, what I do in reaction to that call, how not to be so available. I honestly don't remember things ever being so neurotic in my early twenties (last time I was in a relationship/dating) Does anyone else feel that way? I wish I could just put down my guard and say what I feel, call someone and not worry about being too available, coming across as too eager, too much,...you know just too much.. I am not sure I subscribe to the whole "Gotta be mean to keep em keen". Shoulda woulda coulda, I guess. Tell me I am not alone in this. The last three months has been about the most tiring for me mentally and, I'm not even close to dating someone regularly. Wouldn't it be great to simply live in a world where women could be SAFE everywhere? Wouldn't it be awesome if women could ask the questions to which they REALLY want to know the answers (of dates and potential dates)? And wouldn't it be grand if women could answer completely and without needing to play-down any sexual attraction they might have (in part because that can just prove dangerous)?? You gave yourself plenty of time before leaping back in... I think you're pretty normal.
Author befreckled Posted March 19, 2010 Author Posted March 19, 2010 When you meet the woman you are SUPPOSED to be with you will be nothing but yourself and be so caught up in the moment you won't have time to analyze anything. It will just come natural. Just keep at it. Good luck. That is what I hope right? Well, in my case a man. SincereOnlineGuy: It would be utopia as well. I am fine to a degree with rejection, that's why there are dates but the games I can't handle. Must make myself within reach but not too available. I am at a place where I am absolutely great with myself alone but of course, life is better shared. So, we'll see. I'm still hanging in there.
craw Posted March 19, 2010 Posted March 19, 2010 ya I'm feeling like that right now, my sibling keeps telling me to take it easy and enjoy it - stop worrying so much.
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