ussy Posted March 17, 2010 Posted March 17, 2010 Im having one of those days, i just miss my ex soooo bad.... i cant help it, i feel like ringing her (dont worry, i wont)... im feeling so so depressed today, i thought a few days ago that i was ok but its starting to sink in and what hurts the most is that i think to myself "how the hell can she live without me for 3 months" its just killing me.... I need some support Im on day 17 of NC after 2 months of begging and getting humiliated by her, i just cant forget the memories we shared together, its just hurting so bad
alphamale Posted March 17, 2010 Posted March 17, 2010 you'll feel better ussy, just hang in there (((((ussy)))))
skydiveaddict Posted March 17, 2010 Posted March 17, 2010 Im having one of those days, i just miss my ex soooo bad.... i cant help it, i feel like ringing her (dont worry, i wont)... im feeling so so depressed today, i thought a few days ago that i was ok but its starting to sink in and what hurts the most is that i think to myself "how the hell can she live without me for 3 months" its just killing me.... I need some support Im on day 17 of NC after 2 months of begging and getting humiliated by her, i just cant forget the memories we shared together, its just hurting so bad No more begging ussy. That only makes it hurt worse.
spriggig Posted March 18, 2010 Posted March 18, 2010 i thought a few days ago that i was ok I know what you mean, I used to like roller coasters. Stay strong, 17 days is a solid showing.
LovelyDaze Posted March 18, 2010 Posted March 18, 2010 I know what you mean, I used to like roller coasters. Stay strong, 17 days is a solid showing. That's true. 17 days is a great start! Don't give up. After my October break up my heart felt like it exploded and crumbled in my stomach. I couldn't get out of bed, I lost about 10 pounds not eating, stared at the ceiling, missed work/college classes, cried until I was exhausted myself to sleep. But slowly but surely...I got up,ate, went to work/college and stopped crying. Just put one foot in front of the other everyday. Every night you go to bed without breaking NC, give yourself a great big pat on the back. That's huge! In time, you will smile & laugh with pure and honest joy. Believe it.
Author ussy Posted March 18, 2010 Author Posted March 18, 2010 Thanks to all you guys for the help..... Its just that i try and fool myself to think that "i dont want her back" but deep down i know that i want her so so much. I just still cant get over things, like the reason she left me is because of stuff i did like 2+ years ago, and i know that i changed so much from that and i did so much for her, her sisters and even her mum.... I was so nice to them all and whenever they needed anything i was always there for all of them, how do people forget stuff like that?? Anyway my point is that i cant stop thinking to myself "why did you do them things 2 years ago, thats the reason she left you...." I cant get these thoughts out of my head and they just drive me insanely crazy...... someone please help
spriggig Posted March 18, 2010 Posted March 18, 2010 Its just that i try and fool myself to think that "i dont want her back" but deep down i know that i want her so so much. I just still cant get over things... Yep. In my case I had a lot of regret and guilt I had to get over. I faced the guilt without making excuses and basically cried my ass of until I felt like I could forgive myself. Forgiving yourself and her might help you move on, if that is an issue for you. Exercise helps too.
Author ussy Posted March 18, 2010 Author Posted March 18, 2010 Yep. In my case I had a lot of regret and guilt I had to get over. I faced the guilt without making excuses and basically cried my ass of until I felt like I could forgive myself. Forgiving yourself and her might help you move on, if that is an issue for you. Exercise helps too. You see, thats just something i cant do, because believe me i did some f'd up things. The worst part is that i dont even know the real "reason" she left me because her reason for leaving has always changed since day 1! That drives me even more in to depression not knowing the real reason. Quite frankly i dont believe anything she says, due to the fact that every time i asked why she left she'd always give a different reason...... Or she would give me the same reason she said before but add on a couple of things, I dont get the b**** at all. Plus the worst thing i ever did she never even mentioned! But she was convienently picking out everything else i ever did..... This just makes me think that that was her real reason for leaving me and i would be totally crushed if it was. Is this just me thinking too much?? I feel so broken
spriggig Posted March 18, 2010 Posted March 18, 2010 Plus the worst thing i ever did she never even mentioned! But she was convienently picking out everything else i ever did..... This just makes me think that that was her real reason for leaving me and i would be totally crushed if it was. Is this just me thinking too much?? I feel so broken This is interesting. My wife did something similar but in reverse. She took responsibility for a lot of little, insignificant things but never has shown remorse or guilt over the cheating--she still insists that they are/were "just friends", I have proof it is/was more than that, tho. Unfortunately, I think you may be right, she is avoiding the same issue you are--whatever it was might be the real problem.
Author ussy Posted March 18, 2010 Author Posted March 18, 2010 This is interesting. My wife did something similar but in reverse. She took responsibility for a lot of little, insignificant things but never has shown remorse or guilt over the cheating--she still insists that they are/were "just friends", I have proof it is/was more than that, tho. Unfortunately, I think you may be right, she is avoiding the same issue you are--whatever it was might be the real problem. Like a year and a half after i did that?? Jeez.... you dont know how BAD that feels..... I just feel devastated. How can she possibly not talk about the real reason for the break up if she really loved me and if the relationship meant anything to her? I struggle to understand why she wouldnt tell me, she never ever mentioned this thing since it happened like a year and a half back...... Surely if it ever really bothered her she would at least mention it? At lease once???
cdt76 Posted March 18, 2010 Posted March 18, 2010 I don't want to make things worse but it sounds like she found another man. All the things she is doing is exactly what mine did and it was all because she cheated on me.
Author ussy Posted March 18, 2010 Author Posted March 18, 2010 I don't want to make things worse but it sounds like she found another man. All the things she is doing is exactly what mine did and it was all because she cheated on me. Definitely not the first time someone has said this to me
spriggig Posted March 18, 2010 Posted March 18, 2010 How can she possibly not talk about the real reason for the break up EXACTLY! Let me know if you figure this one out! Sorry I can't help, we're in the same boat. Have an emergency water ration.
Author ussy Posted March 18, 2010 Author Posted March 18, 2010 Maaaaaan...... I feel so low, i can feel my broken heart beating again I dont know why but i just think im going to end up calling her. I seen her today, I was out with my cousan and she had gone to pick up er little sister from school, was the first time we made eye contact in nearly 3 months I want her back, i miss her
Recommended Posts