mrt336 Posted March 19, 2010 Posted March 19, 2010 I like cuddling. Sleep though? I need my space. More than once I woke up and realized I was drooling in my ex-girlfriends hair. I like sleeping close!
Author Els Posted March 19, 2010 Author Posted March 19, 2010 I admire your attempt to try to understand something. I'd say that my strongest vibe here is that the initiation of the cuddling is inspired by true relaxation and comfort. And that relaxed and comfortable place can SOMETIMES inspire arousal. I don't believe it to be a choreographed ploy to get your goodies every time. The close contact and the warmth tend to inspire his blood to move around, and when blood moves around there is always the possibility that... When he holds you after sex... I'm sure some of it is in direct response to all that we read and hear about women needing and gaining from that connection. (which is fine) At this point, when he is somewhat 'spent', the same positioning just doesn't have the full realm of immediate possibilities as was the case a short while earlier. I think what you are feeling, in the first situation, is his sincerity flowing within him. Nothing you've said is cause for concern on your part. Your curiosity and interest are nice. Thanks, that was a very enlightening explanation. Seldom do we get such detailed analysis of emotions from men, and you and carhill are delightful exceptions.
ADF Posted March 19, 2010 Posted March 19, 2010 I think that for most men, there is no clear dividing line between sexual and nonsexual touching. This is especially true with women with whom men are intimate. With them, pretty much all touching is sexual to some degree.
Author Els Posted March 19, 2010 Author Posted March 19, 2010 Yeah, I was guessing that from my observations, ADF. However, a few (not all) guys here have mentioned that it is not so for them?
Ruby Slippers Posted March 19, 2010 Posted March 19, 2010 What a sweet thread. I like cuddling. Sleep though? I need my space. Rationally, I want my space. But emotionally, I want to cuddle all night long. It used to melt my heart in a MAJOR way that my ex, who was not so verbose with expressing feelings, would cuddle me (GOOD) all night long and wake up with the arm my head was resting on numb. I'd say, "Honey, you don't have to hurt yourself cuddling me all night!" haha But he looked so proud of himself and happy to deal with a few minutes of stabbing arm tingles to put that big grin on my face in the morning. Awww.
Vertex Posted March 19, 2010 Posted March 19, 2010 What a sweet thread. Rationally, I want my space. But emotionally, I want to cuddle all night long. It used to melt my heart in a MAJOR way that my ex, who was not so verbose with expressing feelings, would cuddle me (GOOD) all night long and wake up with the arm my head was resting on numb. I'd say, "Honey, you don't have to hurt yourself cuddling me all night!" haha But he looked so proud of himself and happy to deal with a few minutes of stabbing arm tingles to put that big grin on my face in the morning. Awww. Heh, this. 100%. Although I genuinely enjoy cuddling, actually. It's another level of intimacy, I'd say. There's definitely overlap with that type of intimacy and sex, hence the occasional "physical reaction" on an operant level.
Mary3 Posted March 19, 2010 Posted March 19, 2010 I read that after a man Orgasms he feels an outpouring of love and bonding with you like 500 fold...
marsle85 Posted March 19, 2010 Posted March 19, 2010 I read that after a man Orgasms he feels an outpouring of love and bonding with you like 500 fold... That's Vasopressin, considered the "bonding hormone" released after orgasm. Oxytocin employs a similar action in women.
alphamale Posted March 19, 2010 Posted March 19, 2010 I'm just curious, what goes through men's heads when they're cuddling with a loved one, or just holding them? thuoughts of football, power tools and cold beer, and maybe pizza
Mary3 Posted March 20, 2010 Posted March 20, 2010 thuoughts of football, power tools and cold beer, and maybe pizza LOL .....Hey this brings to mind... I asked this guy who was newly married ( after he told me how much he loved his new wife ) what did he think about while he was making love to her ? He said " How good it feels " I said " Yeah, I know that ..but did you feel how much you loved her " He said " Nah not really because I was too busy noticing how good my ______ felt "
Mary3 Posted March 20, 2010 Posted March 20, 2010 That's Vasopressin, considered the "bonding hormone" released after orgasm. Oxytocin employs a similar action in women. That Vasopressin is awesome
alphamale Posted March 20, 2010 Posted March 20, 2010 Men, could you please share how it's like for you? meh its something we're obligated to do, like taking out the garbage
Mary3 Posted March 20, 2010 Posted March 20, 2010 meh its something we're obligated to do, like taking out the garbage I don't know about that Alpha... There are guys here that do love to cuddle...
alphamale Posted March 20, 2010 Posted March 20, 2010 I don't know about that Alpha... There are guys here that do love to cuddle... i like to cuddle...up to a point
Mary3 Posted March 20, 2010 Posted March 20, 2010 i like to cuddle...up to a point Alpha have you ever been in love ?
marsle85 Posted March 20, 2010 Posted March 20, 2010 I'm with Alpha. I'd like to cuddle for maybe 10-15 mins max post sex. Or even ever in bed. Then comes a nice goodnight kiss and squeeze and i'm rolling over to my side of the bed.
Mary3 Posted March 22, 2010 Posted March 22, 2010 I'm with Alpha. I'd like to cuddle for maybe 10-15 mins max post sex. Or even ever in bed. Then comes a nice goodnight kiss and squeeze and i'm rolling over to my side of the bed. I used to not want to be held when I was sleeping. My ex did. After that marraige , one of my new bf's held me and I actually fell asleep in his arms. Now I am capable of doing that. I can go either way now...
Recommended Posts