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Post break-up Idealizing


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Posted

We all idealize the dumper and I'm no different. But the woman I idealized was ACTUALLY your text book girl. Perfect. Patient, obedient, loyal, loving, caring, witty. I just sometimes think I'll never get a girl like her again. What should I do? (No winning her back. I need to solve my own mental deamons)

Posted

taking the long hard road to realizing she isn't as perfect as you think she is now... we're all flawed, because we're all human. When I hear the word textbook, I immediately think of boring, unoriginal, and dim witted. She was flawed, but it will take some time for you to realize this.

Posted
But the woman I idealized was ACTUALLY your text book girl. Perfect. Patient, obedient, loyal, loving, caring, witty. I just sometimes think I'll never get a girl like her again.

 

Stop dating text books and start dating adventure novels. Life is too short to get hung up on anything or anyone. Write your own story and start living life for the adventure it is. She had her flaws and the only reason you don't see them so clearly is because you idolized her to a point of impenetrable perfection.

Posted

Obedience is one of the things you look for in a woman?!?:sick:

Posted

My ex is by no means perfect and I am sure most wouldn't put up with her issues but the simple fact is out of all the women I have got to know since her she still meets more of my "checklist" than any of them and flaws and all, she is still "the one" so far.

 

I could simply try ignore that since it doesn't make my life any better but it is the simple truth. I also think many probably have dealt with the same situation but just can't accept someone from their past was truly the best fit for them (remember, not all break ups have logic behind them and end for silly reasons, usually because of stubborness/laziness and immaturity to work things out) and then end up in bad relationship after bad relationship because they try and settle for less and it doesn't satisfy them.

 

Me personally, I am all about not getting involved with others if I know right off the bat they don't fill more of my checklist than my ex back then did and that it'll mean i either just date them for the company (basically using them) and that eventually things will end. I have no desire to settle just to with someone.

 

I am all for someone better coming along but I have all but lost faith that is going to happen.

Posted

You just make it sound as though you haven't gotten laid in a long time.

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