XKatieX Posted March 14, 2010 Posted March 14, 2010 How can you still love someone..after the endless fights, the names they've called you, the times they've left you and the hurtful things you'll never forget. Is it because we hold on to what they used to be, or what we know they could be? He's made me feel really worthless lately- and basically he told me I was. So why do I still love him as much as I ever did?
That_girl Posted March 15, 2010 Posted March 15, 2010 I don't know. I am in the same position as you....and I still love him too. I wish he would come back. But deep down I know that he won't. And I'm not sure if I REALLY want him too. I don't get it when people say "You're in love with the person he USED to be". I mean, I'm still the same person....and I'm assuming he is too, except that he no longer has feelings for me. I guess there might be some truth to that though. I do know for sure that verbal/ physical abuse takes a LONG time to get over. You think that you really love that person because you are so addicted to the pain. And the Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde routine really confuses a person. You stated that he put you down all the time. My ex did too. That's what stops me from contacting him. You figure "there is something not right here if the person I love can make me feel this low." I am sure that you will get over this in time. You might look back and think "what a loser", or you might look back and think "he was alright, but just not for me." But you WILL survive. Believe me, I feel your pain right now. But it has to get better eventually.
phoenix1 Posted March 15, 2010 Posted March 15, 2010 Yeah, I can relate to this somewhat...things for us though didn't get bad until we broke up and tried to be friends..big mistake. I think it's true, that I know when I think about him in a positive way, it's definitely not who he is today - not a nice person, but who he used to be with me, very sweet and loving. So I remind myself, that person is gone. But if there was one thing I could do, it would be to just stop loving him, I can't seem to get there. I don't want him back, because I know it would never be the same and it would never work, but somehow even knowing this, I still love him.
ashleigh422 Posted March 18, 2010 Posted March 18, 2010 I must tell you.. you could be loving him for all those reasons.. who he was and what you know he could be... My ex and I were together 6 years... we split up three times in the last year, each time I let him come bak.. things are okay for a while then bam.. it happens again.. I kept saying but i love him.. It happened over and over again he never changed so I left.. can't look back.. there is too much to look forward to, life is toooo short to live feeling like **** about yourself becuase someone else needs to feel better about thierself.
LovelyDaze Posted March 18, 2010 Posted March 18, 2010 How can you still love someone..after the endless fights, the names they've called you, the times they've left you and the hurtful things you'll never forget. Is it because we hold on to what they used to be, or what we know they could be? He's made me feel really worthless lately- and basically he told me I was. So why do I still love him as much as I ever did? It's both. You miss the memories of someone that was good to you at the time and you mourn the future you thought you would have with them. Always remember that you are made of love and that doesn't have to stop. You don't have to be with the person you love, especially if they have hurt you deeply. But you can love them enough to let them be who they are...just away from you. Most importantly, Love yourself immensely. You will have your body,mind and soul forever. That is a guarantee. Even if you and your ex get back together...EVEN if you meet a new guy tomorrow and it lasts 40 years...That person can leave you at anytime whether through breaking up or death.You can't walk out on yourself so treat yourself like a million bucks because you are worth that and more.
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