USMCHokie Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 I'm tired of going out and being left wondering what the hell the mass douchebaggery has that I don't. I'm tired of going up to the dance floor and having girls look at me in disgust and leave because I showed up. I'm tired of wasting girls' time talking to them. I'm tired of consuming a few drinks, then actually thinking a girl would be interested, then realizing how stupid I was for thinking a girl would be interested, and then spending the rest of the evening pissed off at the world for dealing me such a sh*tty hand. I'm beginning to feel that my ex is the only girl that was stupid enough to date me...it was a fluke...and that was my one taste of a relationship... So I pledge that from this moment on, I will not place myself in any sort of social situation that involves a female. That is all. Have a good evening.
JaneDoe35 Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 I can't comprehend that women are looking at you in disgust. I had a peek at your photo's and you appear to be an attractive and approachable looking man. How old are you and where do you go out?
JaneDoe35 Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 I probably should clarify that I am asking what your age bracket is and the type of place you go out to!!!!
DollWelch Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 Oh, don't be so hard on yourself, USMHokie. You're just going through some turbulent times in your dating/love life, and sooner (rather than later) you'll be up on your feet again. Don't let those negative thoughts get to you! Look on the bright side, if you at least go out and make an effort to converse with women at local venues such as the grocery store, or market, you'll eventually befriend someone -and that may eventually lead to romance. Are your standards too high? Do you fake it, or do you project yourself as who you are? Have patience, and smile! You'll find someone. Just food for thought.
BobSacamento Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 Unfortunately, women will not magically appear at your door. You could do a cost benefit analysis of a mail order bride but I think it's more fun to roll with the punches and hit the bars. Sometimes it is good to spend time on yourself too. I almost look at it as building a portfolio of reasons of why you're a catch. Granted I don't go out there advertising it but it helps brush off the petty BS for some reason. It's helped me avoid self pity and look at being blown off as a mistake on their part and I almost pity them. I guess that's the rationalization/justification I strive for.
counterman Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 Yeah, don't be so down on yourself. You seem like a pretty cool guy, just hang in there.
phineas Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 how old are you? in most clubs you only see younger 20's women on the dance floor.
BobSacamento Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 how old are you? in most clubs you only see younger 20's women on the dance floor. Can you say jackpot?
Author USMCHokie Posted March 13, 2010 Author Posted March 13, 2010 I'm 26. Normally go out to bars...some of which have dance floors, others which don't...I'm not a big fan of clubs, but I've only been to a club twice in my life... Dollwetch, I'm not socially awkward, and I'm always friendly with everyone in public. I approach everyone with a smile and a greeting, whether it's a cashier at Target, or just someone running by at the local running route. I don't think I have standards that are too high...heck, I'm not sure I even have standards anymore... Bob, getting a mail order bride has been considered before...
make me believe Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 What types of bars are you going to? I recommend going somewhere laid back and casual, not a dancey/club type of place. Approaching women on a dance floor is NEVER going to work. They immediately think that all you want is a piece of ass, and they are probably being approached by different guys all night long. Don't take it personally!!
BeTrue Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 I just looked at your photo. You are very attractive. I'm 26 and can say girls at the bar with their girls are going to act retarded. It's just how it is If even one of their friends say's something they are not going to give you a chance. Dumb but true. Maybe you should try talking to and meeting girls outside of the bar, if you meet someone your attracted to at the coffee shop or laundry mat don't be afraid to approach her. Just be casual. Girls are attracted to confidence. How long was your relationship? When did it end?
CarrieT Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 Why are you trying to find girls in bars? Consider the Meetup.com groups -- find girls with similar interests who aren't hell-bent on just getting intoxicated.
Ruby Slippers Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 Why are you trying to find girls in bars? Consider the Meetup.com groups -- find girls with similar interests who aren't hell-bent on just getting intoxicated. Exactly what I was going to say. Get involved in activities you enjoy, and meet people in more natural, less alcohol-fueled environments.
AD1980 Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 You seem like a good looking dude you shouldnt have problems at all.. Just be thankful you dont have my ugly mug..I have a valid reason why i never approach women..
tami-chan Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 UGGGGHHHHH, hokie!!!!!! stop...you are driving me crazy!!!!! How about going to church? you might find jesus there and jesus will lead you to your ...er...'soulmate"....? or something...!
homersheineken Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 UGGGGHHHHH, hokie!!!!!! stop...you are driving me crazy!!!!! How about going to church? you might find jesus there and jesus will lead you to your ...er...'soulmate"....? or something...! Or maybe a nice little alter boy that the priest is done with :bunny:
tami-chan Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 Or maybe a nice little alter boy that the priest is done with :bunny: uhm...I am pretty sure Hokie is not disgusting as you appear to be....what's wrong with you?
amerikajin Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 I'm 26. Normally go out to bars...some of which have dance floors, others which don't...I'm not a big fan of clubs, but I've only been to a club twice in my life... Dollwetch, I'm not socially awkward, and I'm always friendly with everyone in public. I approach everyone with a smile and a greeting, whether it's a cashier at Target, or just someone running by at the local running route. I don't think I have standards that are too high...heck, I'm not sure I even have standards anymore... Bob, getting a mail order bride has been considered before... It's a slump, Hokey. Even attractive people - men and women - have them. I think the slump analogy is fitting, because they say that when a hitter thinks about what he's doing too much, that's when he starts whiffing at pitches. It's when you can relax and just do what you set out to do that you break out of the slump. The other part of the problem may be that you're trying to start up a romance in a way that really doesn't seem natural to you. Surely you can relate to the analogy of choosing your own battlefield, eh? I think the same applies in dating. There are some people who function well in bars and noisy chatty environments; others, myself included, do not. Find a place that allows you to be you. It's all in your head, man. Trust me. It's hard to see that now, but that's what it is.
homersheineken Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 uhm...I am pretty sure Hokie is not disgusting as you appear to be....what's wrong with you? Do you really need an education in humor? Are you that far removed from reality that this has been a topic of jokes for some time now - esp as more and more sexual scandal stories come out of this sacred place of worship?
LovelyDaze Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 Hokie, Don't do that to yourself. I had times where I wondered what the hell is wrong with me that some guys always start off pursuing me relentlessly and then drop me like a hot potato. Just the other day at work, a cute little 4 year old was with his mom and he says to her, "Mama...she is so beautiful!"....Oh , I had to go to the break room and cry. My co-worker asked what happened and I told him how much that simple expression from a little toddler made my day. Thing is, I should believe that I AM beautiful on my own. You need to know that you ARE lovable and there is a woman out there who is waiting for you because you are everything she has ever dreamed of. Don't stop being YOU, that's what I've learned. And definitely don't quit. If you quit, you will NEVER find anyone at all.
tami-chan Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 Do you really need an education in humor? Are you that far removed from reality that this has been a topic of jokes for some time now - esp as more and more sexual scandal stories come out of this sacred place of worship? Sorry but what you find humorous is not humorous to me...go fly a kite
mixwell Posted March 13, 2010 Posted March 13, 2010 Going out to a club to meet a girls is going to be harder than a normal environment. Girls at clubs have a huge douche bag radar and it is because they are used to the same guys coming up to them all night and acting desperate. While you may not be like these other guys they automatically put you in that category so you already have a negative chance. Think of it as the other douche bags that screw it up for you at clubs.. Especially since you say you've only been to the club 2 times in your life ? I used to go out to clubs all the time and witnessed the douche bags every time I went.. I use to get annoyed that when I was genuine about going and talking to the girl I automatically got the defensive wall. The more you go out to clubs and experience this you can actually start to read women more and by viewing the douche bags you will see why they may act the way they do with all guys..
stepka Posted March 14, 2010 Posted March 14, 2010 Uh, I hate clubs and the ones in DC would have to be some of the most superficial ones in the world. Sorry, I don't mean to slight your city, but I think other activities would yield more nicer girls.
Author USMCHokie Posted March 14, 2010 Author Posted March 14, 2010 UGGGGHHHHH, hokie!!!!!! stop...you are driving me crazy!!!!! Sorry...I can't help it...
Author USMCHokie Posted March 14, 2010 Author Posted March 14, 2010 I just looked at your photo. You are very attractive. I'm 26 and can say girls at the bar with their girls are going to act retarded. It's just how it is If even one of their friends say's something they are not going to give you a chance. Dumb but true. Maybe you should try talking to and meeting girls outside of the bar, if you meet someone your attracted to at the coffee shop or laundry mat don't be afraid to approach her. Just be casual. Girls are attracted to confidence. How long was your relationship? When did it end? Thanks...and I have to agree, what I'm looking for, I won't find in a bar...but it's frustrating nevertheless that I can't even find what I'm not looking for in a bar... The relationship lasted about 6 and a half months...ended near the end of last July...so it's been a while now...
Recommended Posts