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OK women I'll lay it on the line...

alphamale

By alphamale
in General Relationship Discussion

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alphamale Established Member

alphamale

Posted
Posted

Ok women here is the lowdown:

 

  • yes, we know you have a fat bottom if you tie a sweater around your ass, it doesn't hide it
  • if your are ugly and/or fat you shouldn't date out of your league
  • your emotions negate any superior intellect you may have
  • men are better drivers in general
  • you are not as good in the sack as you think you are
  • no, guys are not falling at your feet to ask you out for a date
  • ordering the most expensive item off the menu is bad form
  • most of the men you go out with will not want to marry you
  • accept the fact that you're attracted to the masculine bad boy
  • we know that most of the stuff you talk about with your girlfriends is frivolous baloney
  • no, that new makeup or dress does not make you look different or better
  • equality goes out the door when a spider or small rodent appears
  • you need men, the sooner you admit it the better
  • none of you can keep a secret
  • you know you love the drama, the more the better
  • you won't meet a man at a wine and cheese party or a museum
  • all these dumb tv shows you are watching are a complete waste of time
  • you can take out the garbage just as easily as a man
  • before the time you've left your bf you already have another man (probably one of his friends)
  • yes, female police officers are usually lesbians
  • no, that meatloaf you made last night was not good
  • getting a new hairdo does not make you look better
  • you will not lose 30 lbs on jenny craig in 3 weeks
  • the three cats you own really don't care that much about you
  • the mixed messages you're giving to men is why you're home alone on saturday nite with a tub of ben n jerrys chunky monkey watching reruns of House
  • yes, men do notice your bad taste in shoes or clothes
  • for gods sake clean your privates before an man goes down on you
  • yes you are responsible for the birth control
  • you have no idea what that noise is under your car hood
  • if you can you'll use a man to get what you want
  • its ok, we know you pig out on fast food late at night
  • yes when were on a date and you order just a salad we know you're trying to impress us

Lizzie60 Established Member

Lizzie60

Posted
Posted

  • yes, we know you have a fat bottom if you tie a sweater around your ass, it doesn't hide it

I have a nice aSS and sometimes I tie it around my waist just so I don,t have to carry it..

  • if your are ugly and/or fat you shouldn't date out of your league

How can an ugly/fat date out of her league???

  • your emotions negate any superior intellect you may have

I very much doubt that.. our emotions are a + IMO.. unless it's out of control :p

  • men are better drivers in general

That's probably why the car insurance are much much lower for young female drivers.. :p

  • you are not as good in the sack as you think you are

I know I am...

  • no, guys are not falling at your feet to ask you out for a date

Humm... not sure about that.. :laugh:

  • ordering the most expensive item off the menu is bad form

That I agree..

  • most of the men you go out with will not want to marry you

Most men don't really want to marry.,. they do because they have 'free' sex.. but some are screw*d anyway..

  • accept the fact that you're attracted to the masculine bad boy

I admit it..

  • we know that most of the stuff you talk about with your girlfriends is frivolous baloney

Not at my age..

  • no, that new makeup or dress does not make you look different or better

I have to disagree.. sometimes it does..

  • equality goes out the door when a spider or small rodent appears

I never kill a spider.. I leave them alone.. they are welcome in my home..

  • you need men, the sooner you admit it the better

Nope.. unless I have a 'dirty job' to be done.. (mow the lawn, fix something around the house)..

  • none of you can keep a secret

That I have to agree.. men are better at keeping secrets..

  • you know you love the drama, the more the better

Not for all women..

  • you won't meet a man at a wine and cheese party or a museum

No?? and why not?

  • all these dumb tv shows you are watching are a complete waste of time

I think hockey is also a waste of time..

  • you can take out the garbage just as easily as a man

I do.. each week..

  • before the time you've left your bf you already have another man (probably one of his friends)

Never had..

  • yes, female police officers are usually lesbians

Not sure about that.. don't know any female PO.

  • no, that meatloaf you made last night was not good

I rarely cook.. :p

  • getting a new hairdo does not make you look better

I have to disagree..

  • you will not lose 30 lbs on jenny craig in 3 weeks

I agree.. it wouldn't be healthy

  • the three cats you own really don't care that much about you

I do not own pets..

  • the mixed messages you're giving to men is why you're home alone on saturday nite with a tub of ben n jerrys chunky monkey watching reruns of House

I'm home alone by choice.. trust me on that one.. :laugh:

  • yes, men do notice your bad taste in shoes or clothes

I get compliments all the time.. then they're all liars??? :confused:

  • for gods sake clean your privates before an man goes down on you

I'm squeaky clean all the time.. and I smell good..

  • yes you are responsible for the birth control

Not anymore.. :p

  • you have no idea what that noise is under your car hood

That's why I have a good mechanic..

  • if you can you'll use a man to get what you want

Of course.. I do all the time.. why not.. it's not just the men that can do that.. :p

  • its ok, we know you pig out on fast food late at night

Nope.. only on weekends.. but never late at night.. my liver wouldn't stand it.. :sick:

  • yes when were on a date and you order just a salad we know you're trying to impress us

I hate salads..

  • Author
alphamale Established Member

alphamale

Posted
  • Author
Posted

hahahahaha

MizzBella Member

MizzBella

Posted
Posted

I love you alphamale. Wanna marry me?

 

Ok women here is the lowdown:

 

  • yes, we know you have a fat bottom if you tie a sweater around your ass, it doesn't hide it - nope, I have a tiny butt...butt men must hate me
  • if your are ugly and/or fat you shouldn't date out of your league - really? I know a lot of fat/ugly gals married to hot men
  • your emotions negate any superior intellect you may have - totally agree
  • men are better drivers in general - agree
  • you are not as good in the sack as you think you are - I'm great in the sack, really. My fav activity ever.
  • no, guys are not falling at your feet to ask you out for a date - actually, they are...many except my bf, that is. lol.
  • ordering the most expensive item off the menu is bad form - I eat salads
  • most of the men you go out with will not want to marry you - most of the men I go out with I wouldn't marry.
  • accept the fact that you're attracted to the masculine bad boy - nope. not at all.
  • we know that most of the stuff you talk about with your girlfriends is frivolous baloney - totally true.
  • no, that new makeup or dress does not make you look different or better - you sure?
  • equality goes out the door when a spider or small rodent appears - I like traditional roles. :)
  • you need men, the sooner you admit it the better - yep...it's true.
  • none of you can keep a secret - not true.
  • you know you love the drama, the more the better - not at all true.
  • you won't meet a man at a wine and cheese party or a museum - not unless he is married or gay!
  • all these dumb tv shows you are watching are a complete waste of time - don't have a TV
  • you can take out the garbage just as easily as a man - but I prefer a man to do it
  • before the time you've left your bf you already have another man (probably one of his friends) - hmmm...maybe
  • yes, female police officers are usually lesbians - really?
  • no, that meatloaf you made last night was not good - I don't cook
  • getting a new hairdo does not make you look better - at least I'm not bald
  • you will not lose 30 lbs on jenny craig in 3 weeks - heehee
  • the three cats you own really don't care that much about you - cats stink
  • the mixed messages you're giving to men is why you're home alone on saturday nite with a tub of ben n jerrys chunky monkey watching reruns of House - I don't give mixed messages
  • yes, men do notice your bad taste in shoes or clothes - and I notice theirs
  • for gods sake clean your privates before an man goes down on you - oh, definitely!
  • yes you are responsible for the birth control - no kidding!
  • you have no idea what that noise is under your car hood - can you fix it?
  • if you can you'll use a man to get what you want - and if you can, you'll use a woman to get what you want, no?
  • its ok, we know you pig out on fast food late at night - love love love food
  • yes when were on a date and you order just a salad we know you're trying to impress us - I actually love salad

whichwayisup Established Member

whichwayisup

Posted
Posted
yes, female police officers are usually lesbians

 

And most male cops are narcissists.

 

men are better drivers in general - agree

 

True. Though you haven't seen me drive. I can parallel park like there's no tomorrow! :laugh:

 

yes when were on a date and you order just a salad we know you're trying to impress us - I actually love salad

 

I ordered a salad or two during the first bunch of dates with my now H. It was because I was nervous, had butterflies in my tummy and I COULDN'T eat! I wanted to but no go..

 

I like this thread.

2sure Established Member

2sure

Posted
Posted

I think you might be onto something with the cat thing. Ive suspected this for some time now to tell you the truth.

tissue_bear New Member

tissue_bear

Posted
Posted (edited)

Some of what you wrote is true as generalizations, a lot isn't but what I take particular opposition to is the notion of shallow and frivolous female friendship. I mean the following: "we know that most of the stuff you talk about with your girlfriends is frivolous baloney", "none of you can keep a secret" and other references to women's preoccupation with clothing and such. The media portrays this position as well and I just don't get it. Its as though its an acceptable notion in today's world that women are "bitches" and shallow to each other and that there is no such thing as true female friendship. That only men create trustworthy human bonds.

 

Is this your view as well? Or other readers of this thread?

 

My girl friends are the best friends I could ever imagine. I would give a lung, a kidney, my money and travel across the world for them if need be. I have done the money part and was about to to do the travel part until the friend's need was eliminated at the last minute (never mind the specifics). So its not just talk. ANY time I have needed them or vice versa, they have been there.

 

Personally I feel the depth and richness of female friendship can far exceed that of male "camaraderie". I know my friends, inside and out. They can open up to me and I to them. Why is that worth so much less than silently sitting next to each other and punching on the shoulder, knowing each other's worth as a "brother". Its about being there for the other person when they really need you, isn't it? I just don't see why women are viewed so poorly in this regard.

 

What do women do when they meet? TALK. Sometimes its about clothing, depends on the women I suppose. About our lives and what's going on in them, the challenges of either work, study or home. Most of the time in my experience, its about relationships and people. I don't mean gossiping though don't get me started on that, men are the WORST gossipers. Its about us, each other, our relationships, our feelings, our opinions on things. We try to learn and grow from each other. Why is that considered frivolous? I truly don't get how talking about emotions is so much more frivolous than talking about video games, computers or sports.

Edited by tissue_bear
carhill Established Member

carhill

Posted
Posted

I would rather know more about my marital business than my wife's girlfriends do. Thanks :)

tissue_bear New Member

tissue_bear

Posted
Posted
I would rather know more about my marital business than my wife's girlfriends do. Thanks :)

 

I'm not contending that. You are 100% right and there are things that should stay between the couple and only the couple.

 

That isn't to say that sharing emotions is frivolous. When sharing stories negatively affects a marriage or relationship, it isn't frivolous its harmful. Its good for couples to set boundaries - what is or rather isn't ok to share with friends.

carhill Established Member

carhill

Posted
Posted

I was just adding to the list. No prejudice intended. Happy to hear opinion :)

 

Related in other threads, I've been on the receiving end of this dynamic recently (someone sharing her marital business) and it makes me uncomfortable. I'm unclear if women perceive things similarly but wanted to share my boundary.

sally4sara Established Member

sally4sara

Posted
Posted

  • if your are ugly and/or fat you shouldn't date out of your league

 

One would hope all advise given can be followed by the one extending the advise rather than the belief that purchasing a meal should make you exempt to the advise.

annxxdisaster Established Member

annxxdisaster

Posted
Posted

  • yes you are responsible for the birth control

 

If it's the pill form of BC, I agree. However, if it's just condoms BOTH parties should be prepared for that--it shouldn't be expected that one person always has to buy it.

 

Otherwise I'll see you in court regarding the child support payments. ;)

Pyro Established Member

Pyro

Posted
Posted

Alpha has made it very clear on why he is 44 and still single.:laugh:

  • Like 1
allina Established Member

allina

Posted
Posted

WTF alpha?! My cats absolutely care about me and they don't stink :rolleyes::mad:

Tayla Established Member

Tayla

Posted
Posted

SInce this post was meant to create the ever existing wedge of gender differences I will say this. The only difference is us ladies, dont need to downcast the other gender to feel confident in our skills and shortcomings. The proof is in the pudding.

sweetjasmine Established Member

sweetjasmine

Posted
Posted

OP, that was really deep, meaningful, and insightful.

 

Did you get it from Maxim or was it askmen.com?

 

 

 

:lmao:

Taramere Established Member

Taramere

Posted
Posted
SInce this post was meant to create the ever existing wedge of gender differences I will say this. The only difference is us ladies, dont need to downcast the other gender to feel confident in our skills and shortcomings. The proof is in the pudding.

 

Yep. I mean one can argue that things like this are just a joke that shouldn't be taken seriously. I'm fine with that if the insults are satirical in nature. This isn't anything close to satire though. It's just a list of very pedestrian and quite hostile insults towards women, along the lines of "most of you are pathetic, stupid and ugly."

Crazy Magnet Established Member

Crazy Magnet

Posted
Posted

I've managed to narrow down the source of that "funny" engine noise. It's whatever that belt thingie is that makes the air conditioner/heater work. It's not an exceptionally scientific or mechanical description, but by god I can point out the car part! lol

 

My BF freely admits to falling head over heels for me the moment I ordered on our first date and was open in my disdain for all things which resemble rabbit food. :D Who knew scarfing down dessert made a man swoon! lol

carhill Established Member

carhill

Posted
Posted
I've managed to narrow down the source of that "funny" engine noise. It's whatever that belt thingie is that makes the air conditioner/heater work.

 

Serpentine belt. If the belt is otherwise good, it might be dried out a bit from winter or one of the idler/tensioner pulley bearings is going south. Usually blue collar guys with mechanical smarts want sex and will fix such things if the perceive they will get that opportunity. I'm not one of them ;)

terra Established Member

terra

Posted
Posted

How would ordering a salad impress a guy? I would think it would do the opposite -salads aren't fun - they are the most boring thing on the menu.

Stung Established Member

Stung

Posted
Posted
How would ordering a salad impress a guy? I would think it would do the opposite -salads aren't fun - they are the most boring thing on the menu.

 

 

Right? I always figured guys were impressed when I could drink them under the table. ;)

Jeff1962 Established Member

Jeff1962

Posted
Posted

I would like to add my 2 cents to this.

 

 

 

I like beer and Tequila. Enough said.

TwilightSky Established Member

TwilightSky

Posted
Posted (edited)

..........

Edited by TwilightSky
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