Marek Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 What's with women who see fit to abuse men in public? Example: Today, I was walking to a café after work and I pass these two bitches. As I walked past one says to the other, "God, he looks like a fag". And both proceed to chuckle. I had a good mind to yell out "stupid, ugly wh*res" as I heard their laughter. Alas, I was too weak, once again. This abuse from some women has been happening all too often lately. I guess my question is directed at the women on here. That question is this: How many of you broads actively abuse guys as you don't even know?
Author Marek Posted March 8, 2010 Author Posted March 8, 2010 Ahh, not quite sure what you mean, but if you're implying that I believe it was directed at me when it really wasn't, you're wrong. Me and these two women were the only people in vicinity. So of course it was directed at me.
Bejita463 Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 (edited) Ahh, not quite sure what you mean, but if you're implying that I believe it was directed at me when it really wasn't, you're wrong. Me and these two women were the only people in vicinity. So of course it was directed at me. You're right. They could not possibly have been talking about someone they mutually know. It HAD to have been you. Additionally, everyone knows that validation comes from without, not within. The seeds of confidence must be planted by those who are not us. Seriously, even if they were talking about you, who cares? What do you think about you? The opinions of others, neither positive nor negative, should not have much of an impact on your own feelings of self worth. Edited March 8, 2010 by Bejita463 Missed a word.
ADF Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 Frankly, in my experience, men are FAR more likely to engage in this kind of public abuse than women. Far more likely. Especially when the abuse is homophobic in nature. I think you just ran into a couple of real idiots.
always_searching Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 You're right. They could not possibly have been talking about someone they mutually know. It HAD to have been you. Additionally, everyone knows that validation comes from without, not within. The seeds of confidence must be planted by those who are not us. Seriously, even if they were talking about you, who cares? What do you think about you? The opinions of others, neither positive nor negative, should not have much of an impact on your own feelings of self worth. So, you're telling me if someone walked right past you and said, "He looks like a fag," you wouldn't be the least bit phased? I'm a confident person, but if two guys (or two girls) walked past me and said, "She looks like a(n) (insert your derogatory word of choice here)," I would be taken aback and probably a little hurt. Haha, for about two seconds, and then I would laugh in their faces--being jovial is just the type of person I am! Life's too short to let two idiots tell you who you are or what you look like. Still, no one likes to be spoken ill of. Course, I've been called a dyke and bitch, among many other things--not recently, but we all go through middle school/high school, right? I will admit that I would be less phased by it now than I was then. To the OP's original question: I think that there are mean and negative people (not just women) in this world, and, unfortunately, we have to live with them. Just learn to love yourself and don't worry about what ignorant people have to say about/to you. Screw them! *ahem* I mean, pray for them.
Ross PK Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 You're right. They could not possibly have been talking about someone they mutually know. It HAD to have been you. Additionally, everyone knows that validation comes from without, not within. The seeds of confidence must be planted by those who are not us. Seriously, even if they were talking about you, who cares? What do you think about you? The opinions of others, neither positive nor negative, should not have much of an impact on your own feelings of self worth. Why do you think there's such a good chance it wasn't said at him? I'm sure if you're walking down the street and someone looks at you and comments on how you look then it is about you. It's like you're just trying to turn all of this around onto him as though he's the one who's being stupid or something.
Bejita463 Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 So, you're telling me if someone walked right past you and said, "He looks like a fag," you wouldn't be the least bit phased? That is exactly what I am telling you. I think I'm awesome, and I do not care if someone on the planet disagrees with me. Beyond that, I would have no way of knowing they were even referring to me unless it was either said directly to me, or maybe said while looking at me. I love myself plenty, but I am still aware that when people are speaking in my vicinity that it does not automatically mean that I am the center of their attention. Besides that, people are cowards. It is uncommon for someone to say something that might cause confrontation around someone while they can still hear it.
lino Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 Some people are just like that, both guys and girls. Not too many like that where I'm from luckily... Sydney is a different story, plenty of f*ckwits there! Why do you think there's such a good chance it wasn't said at him? I'm sure if you're walking down the street and someone looks at you and comments on how you look then it is about you. It's like you're just trying to turn all of this around onto him as though he's the one who's being stupid or something. It's called acting like know it all mate... happens pretty often on here He wasn't even there yet he knows all about what went down
Bejita463 Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 I'm sure if you're walking down the street and someone looks at you and comments on how you look then it is about you. I missed the part where he was being looked at when the comment was made. I also missed the part where one's opinion of self worth requires external validation.
phineas Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 i'm an ass. I've made comments to mean women in a bars loudly concerning their make-up & a putty knife. I also got a friend that loves to quote churchill when dealing with women with attitudes in bars. It's hilarious.
Bejita463 Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 I've made comments to mean women in a bars loudly concerning their make-up & a putty knife. What's wrong with too much makeup?
Woggle Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 Just insult them back. If you do not work with them there is nothing they can do about it.
Author Marek Posted March 8, 2010 Author Posted March 8, 2010 Yes, it was directed toward me. Bejita, these two women were looking at me as I passed them, and there was nobody else within vicinity. I (or anyone) would have to be incredibly náive not to conclude it was directed at me. As for seeking validation from others, I know it's wrong. But when this happens FREQUENTLY it DOES erode your self-esteem. I suppose what pisses me off the most is that I just walked by without saying ANYTHING back. I just walked on thinking, "Did these bitches just call me a fag?!" And then when they were out of ear-shot it was too late to say, "stupid, ugly wh*res". People like this really ought to be hanged like some of Hitler's assassanation conspirators were: dangling slowly from piano wire...
Leia Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 That is exactly what I am telling you. I think I'm awesome, and I do not care if someone on the planet disagrees with me. Beyond that, I would have no way of knowing they were even referring to me unless it was either said directly to me, or maybe said while looking at me. I love myself plenty, but I am still aware that when people are speaking in my vicinity that it does not automatically mean that I am the center of their attention. Besides that, people are cowards. It is uncommon for someone to say something that might cause confrontation around someone while they can still hear it. Barney Stinson would have said ... I am AWESOME!
Author Marek Posted March 8, 2010 Author Posted March 8, 2010 That is exactly what I am telling you. I think I'm awesome, and I do not care if someone on the planet disagrees with me. Beyond that, I would have no way of knowing they were even referring to me unless it was either said directly to me, or maybe said while looking at me. I love myself plenty, but I am still aware that when people are speaking in my vicinity that it does not automatically mean that I am the center of their attention. Besides that, people are cowards. It is uncommon for someone to say something that might cause confrontation around someone while they can still hear it. By the way, they were looking at me. And imagine being abused EVERY day and then come back and tell me how you still feel you're "awesome".
Bejita463 Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 By the way, they were looking at me. And imagine being abused EVERY day and then come back and tell me how you still feel you're "awesome". I received far worse treatment than name calling (though it was inlcuded) when I was in the military, and I did continue to believe I was awesome, actually. People acting that way are saying more about themselves than they are anyone else. It's all about how you choose to react to the situation. I just think you are giving more credit to the words than they deserve, whether they are directed at you or not.
Author Marek Posted March 8, 2010 Author Posted March 8, 2010 I received far worse treatment than name calling (though it was inlcuded) when I was in the military, and I did continue to believe I was awesome, actually. People acting that way are saying more about themselves than they are anyone else. It's all about how you choose to react to the situation. I just think you are giving more credit to the words than they deserve, whether they are directed at you or not. I'm 26 years old. I've endured such malicious harrassment throughout my these 26 years. Imagine going to work, being out in public, EVERY DAY and having people, both men and women, utter words such as "c*cksucker", "dog", "faggot", "retard", etc., under their breath -- every day. I'm only posting one particular incident, however it happens EVERY day. Tell me how it still makes you feel "confident" and "awesome". THIS IS A LIFE-LONG issue for me. I'm not in high school anymore (yet people have not matured).
Ross PK Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 I think I'm awesome... I love myself plenty... So you're not vain?
stillafool Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 What's with women who see fit to abuse men in public? Example: Today, I was walking to a café after work and I pass these two bitches. As I walked past one says to the other, "God, he looks like a fag". And both proceed to chuckle. I had a good mind to yell out "stupid, ugly wh*res" as I heard their laughter. Alas, I was too weak, once again. This abuse from some women has been happening all too often lately. I guess my question is directed at the women on here. That question is this: How many of you broads actively abuse guys as you don't even know? Why are you too weak to defend yourself? If those women didn't show you respect you certainly don't owe them any. I would never be that rude to either a man or woman.
Ross PK Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 It's called acting like know it all mate... happens pretty often on here He wasn't even there yet he knows all about what went down Lol, exactly.
Ross PK Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 I missed the part where he was being looked at when the comment was made. I also missed the part where one's opinion of self worth requires external validation. I don't really think it needed to be explained. If someone says they were being made fun of, it's most likely that they were.
Author Marek Posted March 8, 2010 Author Posted March 8, 2010 Why are you too weak to defend yourself? If those women didn't show you respect you certainly don't owe them any. I would never be that rude to either a man or woman. Because I was in shock and disbelief as to what I heard (which is surprising, since I hear it all the time). Had I grabbed my balls and responded tit for tat, I wouldn't be on here posting about it, as I would have felt vindicated.
Ross PK Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 Because I was in shock and disbelief as to what I heard (which is surprising, since I hear it all the time). Had I grabbed my balls and responded tit for tat, I wouldn't be on here posting about it, as I would have felt vindicated. I'm sorry that you're going through the crap that you're having to go through. I can understand how if this happens all the time that it would erode anyone's self esteem. It could be more about how you carry yourself. If you're unconfident and have low self esteem it'll show in your body language and arseholes are more likely going to pick on you.
Ross PK Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 Also if it's any consolation, most people have been bullied at least once in their lives.
txsilkysmoothe Posted March 8, 2010 Posted March 8, 2010 Their behavior was not acceptable..... What age were they? I'm just wondering if it is behavior of certain age groups because I don't know anyone, male or female, who would be openly mean like that. What city, if I may ask? I think there are so many regional differences across this country - there are places where people are still nice.
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