Author BookerT Posted March 5, 2010 Author Posted March 5, 2010 That's funny. I'm not attracted to players. Please, someone come tell me what I'm attracted to. I have no idea. You represent the entire female population? I didn't say all women are attracted to players. I said players know what women want more than women do, esepcially the ones that fall for players. Read what I wrote carefully. The wording is different from what you implied I said, which is you like players.
threebyfate Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 Ok, my definition for top, as in top in terms of personality, looks, job, etc, ie the overall package. David letterman, Tiger woods, Bill Gates and other similar jerks attract more women, no? I'm talking about numbers, forget individual preferences since we're talking about a population. Forget individuals for a moment, I'm talking about across the entire population. The top 10% of men attract and date 50% of women, women will gravitate to outgoing, fun and successful men, just like men gravitate to beautiful women. The next 50% of men are your average joes, they date normally. The bottom 40% of men rarely get dates.Your stats are nothing but a buy-in to those silly PUA sites, who want the money of guys who don't have a clue. Here's a poll done on LS, with real life examples of what women have HAD in real relationships, rather than the smoke and mirror statistics. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?t=222695 Here's the statistical results of this poll and also, my own conclusions drawn off these statistics: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showpost.php?p=2676467&postcount=43
Author BookerT Posted March 5, 2010 Author Posted March 5, 2010 Your stats are nothing but a buy-in to those silly PUA sites, who want the money of guys who don't have a clue. Here's a poll done on LS, with real life examples of what women have HAD in real relationships, rather than the smoke and mirror statistics. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?t=222695 Here's the statistical results of this poll and also, my own conclusions drawn off these statistics: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showpost.php?p=2676467&postcount=43 No, I made those stats up off the top off my head Right, so top dogs like David Letterman, Tiger Woods, and Bill Gates, do NOT attract WAY MORE women than the average male? In fact a funny, outgoing guy driving a ferrari around is NOT going to attract WAY MORE women than the average male? Oh come on........ Besides this forum is full of people with relationship problems, making any examples inaccurate.
Johnny M Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 But I will throw something out that very few women will agree with. I think players know what women want more than women do, whilst your typical nice guy is totally clueless. That is a spot on observation.
threebyfate Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 No, I made those stats up off the top off my head Right, so top dogs like David Letterman, Tiger Woods, and Bill Gates, do NOT attract WAY MORE women than the average male? In fact a funny, outgoing guy driving a ferrari around is NOT going to attract WAY MORE women than the average male?There are definitely gold-diggers out there, in both genders. What that percentage is for women, I would put serious money on, isn't 50% or more of women. Oh come on........ Besides this forum is full of people with relationship problems, making any examples inaccurate.Oh, so your saying that ALL these women who flock to player types, don't have relationship problems? Guaranteed, they do. For most who flock to player types due to money, it's far more than just simple relationship problems, it's serious emotional problems.
Johnny M Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 The self-professed "nice guy" is nothing but a doormat. Neither man, nor woman, wants a doormat, unless they're control freaks or abusive individuals. Sure, many nice guys are doormats because they let women take advantage of them. But here's the key part: women are still the ones doing the "taking advantage of". In other words, for every nice guy there's a manipulative bitch who's using him as a doormat. To say that no woman wants a doormat type is to imply that every woman is deep down a manipulative bitch.
sweetjasmine Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 Right, so top dogs like David Letterman, Tiger Woods, and Bill Gates, do NOT attract WAY MORE women than the average male? They're 'top dogs' because of their power, status, fame, and influence as well as their wealth. Your average good-looking rich player can't compete with someone like Tiger Woods. The "rules" for the ways powerful, famous people interact with others are different.
sweetjasmine Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 Sure, many nice guys are doormats because they let women take advantage of them. But here's the key part: women are still the ones doing the "taking advantage of". In other words, for every nice guy there's a manipulative bitch who's using him as a doormat. To say that no woman wants a doormat type is to imply that every woman is deep down a manipulative bitch. Actually, even using your twisted scenario, if a woman doesn't want a doormat, then she must not be a manipulative bitch. The logical conclusion would be that if no woman wants a doormat type, then no woman is a manipulative bitch. But don't let that get in the way of your deep hatred for women.
TouchedByViolet Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 Sure, many nice guys are doormats because they let women take advantage of them. But here's the key part: women are still the ones doing the "taking advantage of". In other words, for every nice guy there's a manipulative bitch who's using him as a doormat. To say that no woman wants a doormat type is to imply that every woman is deep down a manipulative bitch. I agree completely. I have been struggling with this issue recently and I am glad someone understands
Johnny M Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 Actually, even using your twisted scenario, if a woman doesn't want a doormat, then she must not be a manipulative bitch. The logical conclusion would be that if no woman wants a doormat type, then no woman is a manipulative bitch. No, your logic is flawed. Manipulative women don't want doormat types because they get bored of manipulating them with such ease. They want someone who is more of a challenge. Decent people who are not in the habit of taking advantage of the kindness of others don't hate the so-called doormat types. If a woman wanted to shower me with gifts, support me financially, and so on, I would simply refuse her offers as it wouldn't make me feel good to use somebody like that (a foreign concept to a lot of people these days, I know). But I wouldn't hold it against her or refuse to date her because she's too nice to me. To do so would be absurd - from a decent person's point of view, anyway.
calizaggy Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 I definitely agree that most women want a tiny % of men. When you read most women's "lists", when they just include a few things like "Well educated, handsome, 6ft tall,professional, good income" that already cuts it down to less than 10% of men. And I am not even including all of the other necessary traits they include. Will someone define a doormat? It seems doing something for someone you are supposed to be in love with is now perceived as weak? Perhaps there would be no true doormats, if not for (as Johny M said ) "manipulative bitches" who take advantage of a mans feelings?
alphamale Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 When you read most women's "lists", when they just include a few things like "Well educated, handsome, 6ft tall,professional, good income" that already cuts it down to less than 10% of men. 10%??? its more like 2%
threebyfate Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 But don't let that get in the way of your deep hatred for women. No kidding... If you don't want a doormat, you're a manipulative bitch. Hmmm...sounds to me like someone's doing a full-on manipulation of reality. Most people don't want doormats. This is fact. IMO, the reason why people don't want doormats is because not only are they boring as hell, they pile the entire relationship responsibility onto their partners, needing their partners to MAKE them happy, to complete them. How the hell do you respect someone like that, someone who's not an ADULT PARTNER?
YourOneAndOnly Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 Ahh this is just like my situation! My ex boyfriend and I were together for 3 years. we broke up around 4 or 5 months ago and we're both finding it really hard to adjust. I started seeing someone new really quickly as a typical re-bound relationship, as my ex seemed to be coping much better than me and i needed, as bad as it sounds, a confidence boost and some attention to make me feel better. The only problem now is that im really stuck in a rut. I have developed feelings for the current man, but they are no where near as strong as how i still feel for my ex. He was really lovely, made some mistakes but always made me feel special and we had a kind of playful way together and a kind of love that i wouldnt even want to find with anyone else. Anyway the current man is into class A drugs, gambling and not much else. We never do anything, he doesnt want to do anything, and he tries to stop me from doing anything. He traps me and ive let him do it for so long that now i cant stand up for myself. At the beginning i made him my whole life, to block out all the pain and the feelings of missing my ex, and now im not allowed to have my own life. Meanwhile my ex has had time to be on his own, go out and have fun, and now hes going away to university and is probably ready to move on. Despite what he says. I have lost all the fun we used to have and all the things we used to do, we were always going places and having a good time, to be sitting around at home with someone who just wants to put all their money in a slot machine or sit in bed and snort coke. Don't let it happen to you! Sorry such a rant!
calizaggy Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 (edited) I never encountered this silly "doormat" idea when dating foreign women.. So you meet a woman, fall in love, then have to go out of your way NOT to do things to make them happy, so you will not be a doormat? But then when you do what you feel like (Watch sports, relax, are not their personal entertainer) then you are boring.. The above is why I stick to more traditional foreign women. They demand more attention, demand to be treated better, but atleast what they want makes logical sense. I really cannot imagine this.. "My girlfriend is too good to me and way to agreeable. What a doormat! I want someone that treats me like crap sometimes" Edited March 5, 2010 by calizaggy
Ruby Slippers Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 I know. But when I hear women go, hey it's because I've "grown up" I think it's giving herself more credit than she deserves when the reality is, she was searching for the Prince in shining armour (but was a good partner as well), couldn't find him, so you know...............settled for Shrek! =P Works both ways. Guys are looking for the hottie with the body, but they claim to "grow up" when they settle for the nice girl who will be a good mother and loyal partner -- while many of them continue to whack off to the women they really want, and troll adult "friend" web sites looking for booty on the side. This is just human behavior.
Ruby Slippers Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 Sure, many nice guys are doormats because they let women take advantage of them. But here's the key part: women are still the ones doing the "taking advantage of". In other words, for every nice guy there's a manipulative bitch who's using him as a doormat. To say that no woman wants a doormat type is to imply that every woman is deep down a manipulative bitch. Yeah, and for every fat/nice/homely girl, there's a jerk using her for great head, free rides, whatever. Whose fault is that? These men don't WANT the fat/nice/homely girls -- they're just using them till they land the fox they really want. No one can use you without you giving them permission. Sweet dreams are made of this. Who am I to disagree? I travel the world and the seven seas. Everybody's looking for something. Some of them want to use you. Some of them want to get used by you. I dated a "nice guy" a few months ago. And though I was trying to let him down easy, this man was BEGGING me to use him. I wouldn't -- but I bet a lot of girls would.
Johnny M Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 I definitely agree that most women want a tiny % of men. When you read most women's "lists", when they just include a few things like "Well educated, handsome, 6ft tall,professional, good income" that already cuts it down to less than 10% of men. And I am not even including all of the other necessary traits they include. 10%??? its more like 2% Women who think they can get that kind of man are delusional unless they are themselves at the top of the food chain. I don't know if it's 10%, 2% or whatever, and I'm not trying to toot my own horn here, but I fit calizaggy's description above pretty easily. I'm in my late 20s, 6'2, workout regularly and am in great shape, attractive facial features, well groomed, two university degrees, professional with good income (lawyer), etc etc. And naturally, I have absolutely no interest in dating the average girl next door. I don't even notice such women; it's like they are invisible to me. Do you know why? Because I know, from experience, that I can do much better than that, so I aim for the best I can get. But of course, I am settling too. There are girls out there who are clearly out of my league and I have no illusion about that. The concept of leagues is actually quite helpful. In the end, we all settle to some extent. Think of your ideal man or woman for a second. Now come down to earth and ask yourself: can such person even exist? The answer is no, of course, which means that even the #1 most attractive man and woman in the world had to settle. People who have unrealistic expectations are destined to be unhappy and miserable for the rest of their lives.
Johnny M Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 Yeah, and for every fat/nice/homely girl, there's a jerk using her for great head... Yikes Thanks for the gross mental image... These men don't WANT the fat/nice/homely girls -- they're just using them till they land the fox they really want. Okay, so what's your point? That some men are scum and take advantage of women? Sure, no argument there. No one can use you without you giving them permission. Agreed. But that doesn't excuse the "user's" actions. I dated a "nice guy" a few months ago. And though I was trying to let him down easy, this man was BEGGING me to use him. He wasn't begging you to use him. He just wanted you to like him and be with him and he erroneously believed that being super nice to you would help him accomplish that. I wouldn't -- but I bet a lot of girls would. And those girls are scum.
Ruby Slippers Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 Yikes Thanks for the gross mental image... No problem! Okay, so what's your point? That some men are scum and take advantage of women? Sure, no argument there. That preying upon the weak is something people do, not that just women or men do. He wasn't begging you to use him. He just wanted you to like him and be with him and he erroneously believed that being super nice to you would help him accomplish that. Well, he asked me to let him do things for me, for nothing in return, just so he could be near me and please me. And he assured me this was OK with him, and even enjoyable to him. I actually struggled with the ethics of the matter, in trying to figure out if I should let him do nice things for me when I knew I didn't see long-term potential. He was voluntarily offering favors, expressing full understanding that our involvement would be temporary and I would meet "a better man" (his words) eventually. I ended it because I didn't feel right with the situation. But there was no attempt to manipulate him on my part. He offered himself up to be used freely and willingly. All I could do was encourage him to respect himself more than that.
Author BookerT Posted March 5, 2010 Author Posted March 5, 2010 Works both ways. Guys are looking for the hottie with the body, but they claim to "grow up" when they settle for the nice girl who will be a good mother and loyal partner -- while many of them continue to whack off to the women they really want, and troll adult "friend" web sites looking for booty on the side. This is just human behavior. haha, that's absolutely true. I don't deny that's true. what I have an issue with are the women that try and distort the real reason they're doing what they're doing. It's not like what they wanted shifted, it's just that they're settling for less.
Author BookerT Posted March 5, 2010 Author Posted March 5, 2010 They're 'top dogs' because of their power, status, fame, and influence as well as their wealth. Your average good-looking rich player can't compete with someone like Tiger Woods. The "rules" for the ways powerful, famous people interact with others are different. It's the same principle...... More $, more power = more women. Your average good looking rich player has less $ and power than Tiger Woods, but more than the average man.......
sweetjasmine Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 No kidding... If you don't want a doormat, you're a manipulative bitch. Hmmm...sounds to me like someone's doing a full-on manipulation of reality. Most people don't want doormats. This is fact. IMO, the reason why people don't want doormats is because not only are they boring as hell, they pile the entire relationship responsibility onto their partners, needing their partners to MAKE them happy, to complete them. How the hell do you respect someone like that, someone who's not an ADULT PARTNER? Absolutely. I want a relationship with an adult, not a child who needs me to validate their existence every minute of every day and who is incapable of having his own opinion and disagreeing with me. I don't want to be the center of my partner's universe and have him feel like he can't live without me. No, thanks. Works both ways. Guys are looking for the hottie with the body, but they claim to "grow up" when they settle for the nice girl who will be a good mother and loyal partner -- while many of them continue to whack off to the women they really want, and troll adult "friend" web sites looking for booty on the side. This is just human behavior. Yep, of course it's just human behavior not limited to either gender. But as with every discussion on this board, it's always distorted into "women do X! men do Y!" when it's really about "some kind of people do X, and other kinds of people do Y." It wouldn't be LS if people thought in terms of personality types instead of gender.
Author BookerT Posted March 5, 2010 Author Posted March 5, 2010 There are definitely gold-diggers out there, in both genders. What that percentage is for women, I would put serious money on, isn't 50% or more of women. Oh, so your saying that ALL these women who flock to player types, don't have relationship problems? Guaranteed, they do. For most who flock to player types due to money, it's far more than just simple relationship problems, it's serious emotional problems. Even women that are not gold diggers are drawn to successful men. The women in the OP I was talking about was a successful partner in a law firm. She's just not attracted to men that are not successful. It's even truer for successful women, they're even more likely to want successful men, men their own level rather than settle for less. It's not about $, it's about the natural female instinct of finding successful men, in order to help her and the offspring survive. The more successful and powerful, the more attractive (generally). Don't give humans too much credit. Men and women follow primal instincts more than they would like to admit.
sweetjasmine Posted March 5, 2010 Posted March 5, 2010 It's the same principle...... More $, more power = more women. More $, more power = more partners. Power and status aren't the same thing as "oh he acts like such a bad boy! he cheats on me, but he's so much fun, so I guess I"ll stay." There are men and women with power, status, wealth, and fame who don't act that way, and they still have people chasing them.
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