dave1983 Posted March 2, 2010 Posted March 2, 2010 I know this isn't a relationship forum, however need your advise guys Long story short been with my partner for about 8 months and live with each other, and for the last couple of weeks have been rocky to a point where were breaking up nearly everyweek. last week we argued and she said that she didn't care anymore and that i could txt other women and she wouldn't care.... after that i couldn't take it and i said that's it's over! afterthat she got my clothes threm all over the hallway ect... she said that i couldn't use the electric or sleep on the chair as it was hers. my partner works as a nurse so the time we do have is not much as she sleeps most of the time, so i rarely get any effort from her, iv'e noticed that one minute she's nice and sweet nxt she's argumentative, pikky and nasty, she likes to manipulate things and make me feel guilty, however im not perfect becuase she didn't show me any affection or interest i began txting other women, and about two weeks ago she new about it and didn't tell me. i owned up to it but promised that i wouldn't do it again, which i haven't! from your point of view would you give your bf/gf another chance, i must of given her about 2-3 already i just don't know how much more i can take for example last weekend i was planning to go out with my firend, she said that she wanted to come, so i said that it would be great for her to come, she then checks my phone ands starts reading through my messages that i sent to my mate, i told her that to stop reading through my txt as we talk about guy things ect... she then saids that she doesn't want to go out no-more and falls asleep, so i get ready just 5 minutes before i leave she said's that she wants to come!, i told my her that she's left it abit late and im going her response is"i had enough of you" after that i flipped and shouted dont ever speak to me like that! i think i went abit over the top, but im always giving in, i planned a romantic night last nite cause she worked late, dinner, candles, petals all over the floor, bath i gave her a massarge for her to fall asleep when i was lying naked in the bed! however everytime she does something romantic im always up for it:mad: need help guys thanks
DustySaltus Posted March 2, 2010 Posted March 2, 2010 It sounds like you were both in the wron at some point. At the end of the day what do YOU really want? I don't understand why she is checking your phone to begin with (even though she found something)? Seems like there are trust issues here coupled with a good amount of drama. Communication and Trust are the two most important things in any relationship. Affection is important as well but that alone cannot overcome everything else. She's obviously hurt by what she found. It's going to take hard work on both sides to get things back to the way they used to be which brings up another question.....why do you have other girls #'s on your phone? Is it because of the lack of affection? How long has this been going on?
Author dave1983 Posted March 2, 2010 Author Posted March 2, 2010 (edited) It was the lack of affection, and the arguements all the time. she would work late come home, go to sleep. i wouldn't say anything at all as i knew she was tired, however when we did get round to spend time together she would either be asleep or argue. the thing is the ammount of stuff i do for her seems to equal to nothing. without me she would of been stuffed so many times. Over christmas she was struggling with money so being a caring BF i paid most off the bills, i had to extend My Overdraft so that we could survive in the flat, then Jan came and again she struggle so i helped her out again. then february came and she agreed to pay the food and electric for that month which she did try and do, however did not paid the council tax and didn't tell me, untill i saw a letter from the council demanding paymentm. luckly my gifted parents paid it. Now this month she couldn't afford to pay the MOT, she needs the car for work otherwise we would not be financially stable. so i paid it cause she was in tears ect.... being part of a couple is working together through issues like money, communication, but how is her actions justifies as being a caring and loving GF!, the problem is that she knows how i boil and pushes me to the edge, by saying "i dont care anymore" do what you want". so we end up breaking nearly every week which sickens me to the stomach, she said's its the only way to get attention! iv'e tried talking to her about the underlying issues due to her bad past, which is her ex who cheated on her when she was pregnant, so she had an abortion!? seems to me like she thinks like every bloke is the same so if she act like she doesn't care i wont get hurt. Edited March 2, 2010 by dave1983
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