mizundastud Posted March 2, 2010 Posted March 2, 2010 My ex was my bestfriend and now that I'm going through a rough time I have no one to turn to. I wanna call so bad but I'm trying desperately to remain NC. He was my friend but I'm still in love and I don't want to call him and let him know how ****ty my life is without him. But I do miss talking to him he said he would always be there for me.
drew86 Posted March 2, 2010 Posted March 2, 2010 You can't be his friend if you're still in love because it will hurt you and cheat you out of the time you need to heal. Definitely don't call him saying you're feeling sh*tty! You won't be satisfied with whatever he says I bet. Stay strong
USMCHokie Posted March 2, 2010 Posted March 2, 2010 My ex was my bestfriend and now that I'm going through a rough time I have no one to turn to. I wanna call so bad but I'm trying desperately to remain NC. He was my friend but I'm still in love and I don't want to call him and let him know how ****ty my life is without him. But I do miss talking to him he said he would always be there for me. Don't call him. He left you and didn't want you to be a part of his life, so don't let him be a part of yours. You have not be strong and not let him "always be there for you." Remain NC, as much as it hurts. Hell, talk to me about it. Or any of the fine folks here on LS. I'll be your gay friend.
rand0m Posted March 2, 2010 Posted March 2, 2010 It's funny how at a time when you're in so much pain, the only person you really want to turn to for support and love is the one person you cannot. It's a terrible, miserable, cruel feeling to realize that that person, your lover, your best friend, your world for the past X amount of time has let go and given up. You can be held and supported by a million people, but your heart still aches. But, strength, independence, dignity, and courage will create a better you, and ultimately, be far healthier than trying to hold on to a friendship with someone you are in love with. Don't hurt yourself more by doing that.
Author mizundastud Posted March 2, 2010 Author Posted March 2, 2010 Who would wanna be apart of this mess I call a life......am ashamed to even tell people about the things im going through. funny part is when we were together going through stuff it was ok because we were together but now I'm going the everything alone I feel like I'm going to sink I miss him being there to have my back.
icyness Posted March 2, 2010 Posted March 2, 2010 I'm so sorry you're hurting. I'm going to go with what others have said and tell you to stay NC. It hurts now, but if he rejects you in any way shape or form, it will only be worse and you'll be wondering why you just had to contact him. There's nothing to be ashamed of no matter what problems you're going through, we're only human and we deal with situations given to us the best way we know how. Keep posting and stay strong. xo
GrayTree Posted March 2, 2010 Posted March 2, 2010 I am right here with you. I feel the EXACT same way. Misery has company. Im so sorry...if you need to talk, Im here. I can give you my aim info or whatever.
leoine Posted March 2, 2010 Posted March 2, 2010 Today was a bad day - i thought I was over it but my emotions are running like tides, coming and going. That's how I ended up feeling today, after having a generally good day. I let out by crying if I have to and don't hold back tears. My ex was also my closest friend. After breaking up he said that "wanted to be friends" and "he'll want to stay in touch" with "rare" emails. Well they are rare because I've not even heard "how are doing?" - a one four word line message. I don't accept his fear he said before we broke up that he's "scared" that I'll not answer/reply or be mean. Well - I don't think that's a good enough excuse. He is currently Overseas and he asks other friends how they are doing. I know this because we have mutual friends on facebook and I sometime stumble upon his posts. It's been 2 mths NC, he's not on my FB but he has my email. There is no excuse. The most saddening thing is that I know that if I break NC and ask him how he is doing - he will reply. I don't plan on replying even if he does send me a "how r u?" - BUT the fact that he did it would mean that at least he was sincere when we were breaking up and it wasn't all BULLSH*T coming out of his mouth. I think I want some indicative effort on his part that he'll try to be friends, as he said he would like to I think that would indicate to me that I did mean more to him. But deep down, I think I already know the answer. It might sound crazy, but I'm already thinking about whether I should even send him a simple "Happy B-day" message, cos his b-day is coming up.
GrayTree Posted March 2, 2010 Posted March 2, 2010 Mine said the same thing. Its only been a month for me...but he said we'd be friends...starting with slowly talking online again. Well I see he's on fb all the time but he never comes on aim. He talks to EVERYONE on fb but me. He clearly hasnt tried to be my friend yet. Its makes me fear he never will try... I just want him to come back one day... I feel your pain.
mmk1 Posted March 2, 2010 Posted March 2, 2010 Amy friendship offered by a ex that dumped you will be the most one-sided friendship of all time. I tried and rejected this offer from my ex after several months where they got what they wanted and my needs went unmet. Move on and spare yourself the pain!
Author mizundastud Posted March 2, 2010 Author Posted March 2, 2010 thanks to all for your support i would appreciate a friend....this whole thing is just so confusing. Sometimes he'll call or send an email after we havent talked for a while then I feel comfortable again then he stops. Why is playing with me. I cant trust him to be there for me anymore because he's not obligated since we're not together and i know anytime i talk to him I'll be left unsatisfied. But it seems no one else feels this void like he does. I just dont f**king get it.
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