GrayTree Posted February 24, 2010 Posted February 24, 2010 Does anyone have any expierence with being dumped suddenly and out of nowhere? My bf did this one month ago to me...with completey no warning or warning signs. It devestated me. He says he still loves me though and it "trying to get passed it". And no, there IS NO other woman. Just trust me on this one, please. What are the chances in these types of scenarios of them coming back?
2sunny Posted February 24, 2010 Posted February 24, 2010 the chances of them coming back? HUGE the chances of me taking them back - none.
Abril Posted February 26, 2010 Posted February 26, 2010 :bunny:well my boyfriend dumped me suddenly, one day before he still loved me, and well he never said he dont love me in act indirectly he say he loves me, adn he miss me and ften he keep in touch in msn or emails the reason he cant handdle the relation right nw becuase he have many work with his doctorate and he finish in june he rold me after he finish everyhting will be clearly so be brave and patience maybe he is confused
BserBuff Posted February 26, 2010 Posted February 26, 2010 the chances of them coming back? HUGE the chances of me taking them back - none. Wow impressive, it sounds like ur good at this getting up breaking up thing. Seems to me that uv never been in love. is that true?
LucreziaBorgia Posted February 26, 2010 Posted February 26, 2010 I haven't been dumped suddenly, but I have dumped others and let me tell you - it is never, ever 'suddenly'. I was with a guy in college. We dated all four years. He 'pinned' me (fraternity thing), and we planned to get engaged/married/move in together in his home town. He was going to work on base, I would teach school and happily ever after. Unfortunately, the last year or so I was checking out. I didn't let on that I was because I still wanted to be in the relationship, wanted so badly for it to work for a variety of reasons. Right up to the end even when things were nearly done in my heart, I did not let on. Finally, it reached rock bottom and I decided that I couldn't do it anymore. I didn't want that 'happily ever after'. Couldn't even fathom spending the rest of my life like that. There seemed to be so much more out there at 21 than settling down and that would be the rest of my life. I found someone else, and a week after that I broke up with my long term boyfriend. For him, it was inexplicable - seemed to literally be out of the blue with no warning. For him it was the beginning of the breakup. For me it was the final stage. I would wager your boyfriend was checking out for a while. Finding that the future he thought he wanted with you, was not the one he wanted after all. There were likely plenty of reasons to stay, and as time went by those reasons ran out one by one until he just couldn't be with you anymore. As long as there was ONE reason, he would not act any different. It is an internal thing, this 'falling out of love' process. You don't even see it coming usually until it is already too late. Why did he not give you warning? Because he likely was not wanting to leave when there was reasons to stay, and also because when you are checking out you don't want to invest on 'fixing' something that it might turn out that you don't want fixed. Is there a chance he could come back? There is always a chance, I guess - but from your posts it looks like he was on the way out for a while and is just done. What do you do? I can tell you this - when my boyfriend tried to 'win' me back, it didn't do anything but aggravate me and anger me because of the guilt I was feeling. Eventually I blew up at him and told him to leave me alone, period. Don't let it get to that point. Walk away. If he wants you back, he will come back for you regardless of what you do or do not do.
2sunny Posted February 27, 2010 Posted February 27, 2010 Wow impressive, it sounds like ur good at this getting up breaking up thing. Seems to me that uv never been in love. is that true? yes, i've been in love. i have a boundary and would never go back when a guy decided i wasn't for him the first chance around. when i'm done - i move forward... not back.
aerogurl87 Posted February 27, 2010 Posted February 27, 2010 Yes, my ex told me he loved me and I was the one the same morning he broke up with me. Two hours later I got a text saying he deserved better and was moving on. Next day I found out via facebook that he had a new girlfriend. Chances of them coming back are pretty high IME. My ex left me, then 2 days later he called me drunk and told me he still loved me, wanted me back, but that we couldn't be right now, etc. Skip ahead 6 months later and the a**hole is still in love with me and cares about me. Would I take someone back like that? Not unless they begged for my forgiveness and did everything in their power to win me back, and even then I'd be a little skeptic.
Golfilla Posted February 27, 2010 Posted February 27, 2010 Wow impressive, it sounds like ur good at this getting up breaking up thing. Seems to me that uv never been in love. is that true? It's not a matter of love, it's a matter of self-respect (look it up in a dictionary). If someone suddenly dumps you because someone else caught their eye, they're likely to do it again if given a second chance. Why would you want to be in someone's bullpen until they find someone better?
threebyfate Posted February 27, 2010 Posted February 27, 2010 Yup, exes come back when they can't find someone better. So why would you ever take them back, when they can't appreciate you when they have you?
Abril Posted February 27, 2010 Posted February 27, 2010 me, my ex loved me one day before he dumped me, becuase he feelt overhelmed from the medical school and doctorate and hospital, and because HE FELT PUSHED BY ME i wasnt pushing him he was the one that start the commitment and talked about, and he told me becuase i still talked about my ex boyfriend and he is very jelousy and he cant handle that, so i finally understan he is COMMITMENT PHOBIC so i set him free and startyed no contact from 1 week ago, the same time that takes me email or text him is the same that take to him doing in first and if he really lvoed me as he said before he gonna come back:o
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