LitoJ Posted February 24, 2010 Posted February 24, 2010 (edited) I met my gf back in mid 2007, while I was into the scene of competitive gaming and such. Before this, I had no intentions in finding anyone, I was fine the way I was, but still not exactly perfect, but it was all right, but it all changed till the day I met her. I was asked to do some silly voice over for a friend of mine's movie, and then he invited her. I've talked to girls over mic before that but I don't know why or what was so different about her but, I definitely felt something but in the beginning I denied my inner feelings for her. I always told myself she was just a friend and that I should respect her and I've always have, except the friend part. I remember months later of getting to know her, eventually I asked for her phone number since we liked talking to each other so much. We texted at first, until the day I told her I wanted to hear her since it was long since we talked over mic in the game I used to play. I still remember, ever since that, we would always spend 6 hours daily talking to each other, we've never got bored and it seemed that time easily flowed by. Now, I don't exactly remember what happened after that, but she was mad at me, don't remember what I did to be honest. This is the first time I felt like the world was going to end. She told me she didn't want to talk to me anymore, but all it took was to reveal my true feelings for her that made our bond stronger. It was awkward to her at first, but eventually she realized she liked me as much as I did her. We were still friends, and she was the kind of girl who was too nice, pretty and popular because of her cuteness and personality, so this led to her having a lot of boyfriends, even though they were meaningless relationships to her, she told me she couldn't say no to someone and hurt their feelings even though she preferred me over anyone and everyone. Regardless if we weren't really together, over time we did nothing but treat each other like bf and gf, and she always wondered why we were never officially together. I was scared and didn't want to ruin the friendship we had. Our friendship was so strong. We made promises day and night to each other, made each other feel special and would always love to wake up to the feeling of being in each other's company, it was truly magical. She always wanted me to make a promise book and list all of our promises... I think if we did and we had such a book to this day, I think I would be crying in looking at it to be honest... But anyway, I was really afraid to mess up things between me and her if we got together because I heard before that many relationships failed and specially long-distance ones and eventually the bond is broken between those two people who had something really special before and during the relationship. I told her I would ask her the day I came to live near her that she would be mine...but, something in me told me that it was too far away to imagine. I had a feeling my subconscious was trying to say something one day. We were just messing around like we always would but then, I decide in telling her what if I pretended to "ask her out" and practice it. She was giggly about it as was I, she was adorable. As I did "practice", something didn't feel right...after the second practice, I took a big step with little fear and told her, I'm going to stop that "practice" and ask her for real. And I did, first time I felt like I was truly happy and I had no regrets. It's now 2009 of February, I'm about to have my first ever true valentine's day and first valentine's, and all it took was to look forward to spend time with her that Saturday. This is the day our first break up happens and everything I've worked for, in gaining her trust, her first real "in love" relationship which she said that she could never love a guy but me, and our promises seemed to go down the drain. She broke up because she told me she met another guy, and it filled her void because I was never there to physically comfort her. 3 months later after my first real sufferings, she's finally back with me because she realized(from what she told me) that there's no one in the world like me. I was so betrayed still for what she did with that guy, but I forgave her. During her relationship with that guy, she told me he would always say I love you, but she told me she didn't love him like I she always has me. Everything finally seemed to be ok for once again, but...history has its ways to repeat itself. It was just this weekend that our second break up happened, I was really torn... I understood why she did though, she was too busy for almost two weeks partying with her friends left and right and told me she met some new guy who seemed to understand her pains in life. So did I...so did I, she just never cared to be home to talk to me, that's why she's lost the love for me for good as she said, but she said that last year as well, so this made me very confused. We always promised to be each others' first in everything, if you get where I'm getting at here, but because we meant a lot to each other through out 3 years. Now, it seems she actually loves this guy like she used to love me from what she told me...and today...I think she may have been the new guy's first...it just really tears me that it may have happened...I'm not sure, but how could she do that? Even after being broken up, when I webcamed her on MSN, she picked up the phone to the new guy and started giggling and laughing and telling him stuff that she would ordinarily tell me because our relationship was so strong and special. I spent 3 years with her, and for him i just took a few days because she told me she really got to know him. I'm really...just confused, depressed, and disappointed. I could be extremely angry but I feel hopeless living in this crappy state on the other side of the country from her. She lives in California and I live in Florida, and the only time I visited her was for two days, two damn days. Personally I blame myself for this whole mess and I would have known exactly how to stop it...if only I knew ahead of time. I don't know why she bothers to ask if I'm ok over text messages. I'm not ok. Edited February 24, 2010 by LitoJ
Gcm Posted February 24, 2010 Posted February 24, 2010 I met my gf back in mid 2007, while I was into the scene of competitive gaming and such She lives in California and I live in Florida, and the only time I visited her was for two days, two damn days. That answers a lot! I did read the whole post, and correct me if I'm wrong, but what I gathered was that you've been with this girl for 3 years and seen her twice?! Why did you not make an effort to see her more or vice versa? I'm actually rather surprised that you both managed to continue your "phone relationship" for that whole time. I tip my hat to those that can continue with long distance relationship. Especially over the period of 3 years with little to pretty much no physical contact with their partners. Seriously though, keep your head up. There aren't many guys out there who can keep a girl involved for so long without actually seeing them. That gift you have, use it on the next girl that comes into your life, one that doesn't live 2000 miles away (not from the U.S so I actually had to google the distance ) and I'm sure you'll make her one happy gal. In relation to your last line: She asks because she obviously cares about you. Most of us dumpees lose the confidence we once had whilst with our partners. We tend to think the worst and our perception of that person does a 180. She easily could've hidden this other guy from you, it wouldn't have been hard at all due to the distance. This girl was honest and upfront, she's still making contact to see if you're okay. I obviously don't know the history between the both of you in the last three years, but from what i've read, this girl hasn't done much wrong. That's not to say you have no reason to feel hurt. You obviously shared a lot with this girl. She took up much of your time and you evolved into great friends. Build your confidence back up and share that great personality that you obviously have with a girl who lives much closer. Notice how I didn't say "and one that's also into you"? I honestly believe that this girl was/is into you, probably as much as you were/are into her. There are people out there who can do without the physical attachment, then there are those that simply can't. Again, I credit you both for continuing what you had for three years. All the best mate
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